And if he does, it will be out of obligation, not because he wants to start a family with someone who’s only nineteen.
My head beings to spin, forcing me to sit down as I bury it between my legs.
“I can go get it for you. We can do it together.”
I throw my hands up in the air, my chest tightening. “I don’t want to know just yet… I can’t do this anymore, Liesel. I can continue to lie to my parents, fail college, and be in love with a man in which we don’t have a future together. It’s against all odds.”
At that very moment, my phone begins to vibrate with Mom’s caller ID on the screen. I hit reject, unable to speak to her.
“It’s hard. I get it.”
“No, Liesel, it’s almost impossible to keep going. And now what, I’m supposedly pregnant too? This is so fucked up.”
My breathing begins to falter as I fall sideways, curling up into a fetal position as if it’ll protect me. Liesel lies beside me, holding onto me tight. “You need to talk to him. You can’t go through this alone.”
I shake my head. “And what? Freak him out, too. Never in his wildest dreams will he think to have a child with a nineteen-year-old. You don’t understand, Will has all these amazing things happening for him. Everything he has worked for his whole life is coming to fruition. I can’t be the one to ruin this for him because I was lazy in taking my pill at the same time each day.”
“Yeah, but I’m sure, never in his wildest dreams did he expect to fall in love with someone who has been there all along. Will isn’t a man you picked up on the street. He’s family. That type of connection runs deep. He won’t hurt you, Millie. Besides, he’s old enough to be able to take care of you. Imagine if it were Austin? You’d both be screwed.”
Maybe Liesel has a point, and maybe she doesn’t. But for now, I feel alone.
And perhaps this is the trouble with love. At the best of times, it’s wondrous and core-shaking. Yet, at the worst of times, it can make you feel like the loneliest person in the world.
“Millie,” Liesel murmurs beside me. “You can’t pretend this isn’t happening. Let’s get this over and done with, and chances are, we’re both overreacting.”
An hour later, while I continued to lay on the sofa completely numb, Liesel returns with the test. I beg her to stay with me in the bathroom, and with shaky hands, I grab the stick from her and follow her directions. I nervously pee, then hand the stick back to her as she places it on the vanity.
I flush the toilet and step away, unable to look or even breathe.
Every second that passes is painfully slow.
“Millie,” Liesel breathes uneven and shaky.
Clenching my fists while hyperventilating in the small bathroom, my body tremors to the point I think I’ve stopped breathing.
Liesel holds up the stick, and my eyes scan to see one blue line.
That means not pregnant, right?
But there, beneath the one line I thought would be my saving grace, is another very faint blue line.
So faint but unavoidable.
“You’re pregnant.”
Twenty-Eight
Will
Lex insists I travel to London for three days to meet with shareholders.
It was the last thing I wanted to do, given that I haven’t slept in my bed for close to two weeks. The pursuit to dominate the European market isn’t without its challenges. The pressure is mounting, my attention being pulled in every direction, and sleep becoming an afterthought with insomnia setting in once again.
I dread breaking the news to Amelia, but surprisingly, she takes it well. We didn’t fight or argue, and she simply said she’s busy with assignments since she’s taking extra credits. Her tone is off, yet I don’t interrogate her given that she’s still recovering from the flu. The guilt of not seeing her while she was sick weighs heavily on my mind, but it’s impossible to get a single moment away from work with everything going on.
Lex is more demanding of late, assuming I’m at his beck and call with every goddamn emergency. I sense he has his concerns, many of them with Amelia. Yet, unlike before, he doesn’t mention it to me, and therefore, I don’t ask any questions, careful not to raise suspicions.
I’m given a tour of the potential London office, all of which becomes this added stress. The topic is always part of our discussions in our executive meetings, yet I’m still unable to find a solution that allows me to stay in the States.