My reason to breathe.
And for as long as she is by my side, I will become strong again.
There is no longer a choice in the matter.
22
AMELIA
The doctors reassured us of the baby being in stable enough condition for us to get some rest.
At only twenty-nine weeks, the baby weighed in at only three pounds. His vital organs are much more developed than those of babies born earlier. However, the doctors were adamant he would need to stay in the NICU for weeks, closer to what would have been his due date. On the stipulation if there are no health concerns or complications.
“How about I find a hotel for you to get some rest?” I suggest, placing my hand on Will’s arm.
Since the moment he found out, he hasn’t slept a wink. That was two days ago. His eyes are ringed
in dark circles. The white surrounding his pupils turned bloodshot. Nikki is in no better condition, extreme fatigue aging her usually flawless skin.
He releases a heavy sigh, simply nodding his head.
“You too, Nikki,” Mom tells her softly.
They both agree without an argument. Just like the doctors told us, there isn’t much we can do right now. The baby is stable and progressing at the expected rate for how small he is.
Next to the hospital, there are a few hotel chains in which we can stay. I quickly hop on my phone, booking three rooms—one for Nikki, another for Will, then one for Mom and me to share if needed.
Much like Mom and me, Will and Nikki flew in empty-handed without a spare change of clothes, let alone a toothbrush. I send Ava a text, asking her for help to organize clothes, toiletries, and anything Nikki and Will may need in their rooms. Only to remember Mom and me. I send another text, asking to add that onto the list as well. When it comes to emergencies, Ava is the person to go to. Always with a solution and able to remove herself from the situation in order to complete a task.
Ava: I’m on it. Hope you’re okay, Millie xx
With Will distracted with everything going on, I pass the information to Nikki. She embraces me with a grateful smile, then takes her son to get some much-needed rest.
Once they are gone, I sit beside Mom on the plastic chair.
“I know this is a lot for you,” Mom softly says. “But I want to tell you that you’re doing amazing.”
I rest my head on her shoulder. “It’s almost like with Will. I don’t even think. I just act. It’s always been that way with us, even when I was a kid.”
“I know, honey,” she concurs with a knowing simper. “I’ve seen it.”
“Is that the same with you and Dad?” I ask, pondering life while medical staff walks past us with a sympathetic smile. “I meant to ask, was it always just this force with you? Like nothing makes sense but also makes perfect sense at the same time?”
A smile graces Mom’s face as a sigh escapes her lips. “Yes, it’s quite something, isn’t it?”
We both grow heavy, tired from the rollercoaster we’ve found ourselves in over the last few days. In my wildest of dreams, I would never have predicted this to happen. It’s something you watch on a soap opera or read in some angsty romance novel. How this has become my reality, I will never understand. Though, there is no point dwelling on what cannot be changed. Not when there is a small baby lying inside the room across from us, needing all the love in the world right now.
“Mom, what happens next?”
“As the doctor mentioned, it’ll be weeks before the baby can go home. Then, there is the question of custody of the child.”
“Since Will is the father, will he be given custody?”
“It’s a little more complicated. There is the matter of the paternity.”
I raise my brows. “Paternity?”
“The fact is, Ashley Stone was the custodial parent of this child. According to her parents, Will is the father. However, Will won’t be granted custody until that’s proven in a court of law.”