“I’m not a child.”
“Then why you act like one? Stay here. Don’t go into woods. Don’t follow me.”
And then he was out the door, pulling it shut behind him. I made it to the window in time to see him hit the ground on four paws, hurtling toward the tree line. The last I saw of him was his tail, and then he was gone.
leave us behind/slow drumbeat
He didn’t come back that night.
I waited, watching through the window as the shadows lengthened and snow started to fall, but he never came. Twice I went outside to get more firewood, listening to the sounds of the forest around me, but there was nothing.
I gave a brief thought that maybe he’d followed through with his threat and left, but it didn’t feel right. That off feeling about the woods was still as strong as ever, like it’d been infected with something rotten.
I almost locked the door.
I didn’t in case he came back.
And since I wasn’t stupid, no matter what he said, I didn’t go into the woods, even if the itch to do so was maddening.
I went back through the cabin. I remembered something Robbie had told us about how he’d had a hidden cubbyhole in his house in Caswell where he’d kept his secrets. I told myself that Gavin could have done the same, and though I didn’t know what he’d keep hidden, I hoped it would give me something, anything—an insight to who he was as a man.
But the walls were sturdy and hadn’t been altered.
There was nothing under the bed.
I eyed the fireplace, wondering if I should douse it and check the brick in the back.
Kelly said, “What do you think you’re going to find?”
He was sitting on the bed. He wore the same hoodie I had worn, the one I’d stolen from his room before I left Green Creek. He watched me with a curious expression, and though I tried not to look directly at him, it was almost impossible not to.
“Carter?”
“I don’t know.”
He nodded. The bed squeaked as he slid on it back against the wall, legs crossed in front of him. He tugged at the sleeves of the hoodie, something he did when he was nervous or tired. He looked around the cabin. “Doesn’t seem like much, huh?”
“No.”
“He doesn’t have anything.”
I looked around the cabin. “It’s like he’s….”
“Stagnant. Stuck.”
“Yeah. Maybe.”
“You found him, though.”
“I…. He doesn’t want me here.”
Kelly snorted. “I could have told you that a long time ago. Come on, man. You had to know that’s what he was going to say. And there’s probably some truth to it too, though I think it has less to do with you and more to do with his father. What’s the plan here, Carter? You’ve had a year to come up with something. You can’t have thought he was going to listen to you. You left us all to find him. Guess what? He’s here. You’re here. What happens now?”
“I don’t know.”
Kelly shrugged. “Did you ever?”
“I thought so.”