Rock My World

“Three dates.” I try to ignore the racing of my pulse. “That’s a bit overwhelming.”

“You don’t have to do them all together. Ask Hayley to spread them out. She will, she’s there to work for you, that’s what you’re paying her for. Don’t worry too much about it.”

I nod slowly. Since I made Luci delete that status almost as soon as she posted it, I don’t think anyone saw it which also takes the pressure off a bit. I don’t want anyone to know what I’m doing, for me, it’s really personal. I’m not particularly concerned about my parents. Since they’ve retired, they are always on some cruise or another with barely any phone signal, nevermind Internet connection. They are cut off from the world and that’s how they like it. It’s everyone else that I don’t want to know about what I’m up to.

No, it’s just me, Luci, Hayley, and whatever guys I date, and since they’re in it too I’m sure they will want to keep it to themselves. This is purely an anonymous way to expand my horizons.

“So, what do I do now?” I ask while looking at the pictures of the three guys I’ve chosen. Thankfully, none of them share any of the qualities that a certain lead guitarist and singer from a certain band had. It’ll be fine.

“Send an email to Hayley. See what happens from there.”

Luci eyes me expectantly which makes me send the email right away. It’s good really, I don’t want to give myself any time to talk myself out of it. I word the email carefully, letting Hayley know that I don’t want to be overloaded with dates, but that I would like to go out with Harrison, Max, and Bradley if they are up for it.

Moments later, I get a reply.

“Oh, Luci, she’s going to contact the guys, see if they want to go out with me, then let me know when she can set something up. She’s also invited me to something called a singles mixer, should I go?”

“No way!” Luci shakes her head hard. “You aren’t ready for a mixer. Let’s just do the dates first.”

“What’s a mixer?” I can’t help but be curious. “And why am I not ready?”

“It’s like a party but only single people are invited. As I’m sure you can imagine, it quickly turns in to a meat market where people are all about hooking up. I just don’t think that’s what you want.”

I shudder and fire off a response, thanking Hayley for her work on the dates but turning down the mixer. Luci is right about that one, I’m not ready. I need to learn to trust her more. Her intuition is always spot on.

“Okay, done.” A horrible thought strikes me hard. “What if all the guys say no? What if they don’t like me?”

“So what?” Luci shrugs, all blasé. “Does it matter? Not everyone is everyone else’s cup of tea.”

“No, I know, but…” She’s right, again. “But it will be a confidence knock.”

Luci rests a hand on my shoulder. “Honey, dating is all about getting your confidence knocked. Especially in this day and age, but don’t worry, you’ll soon learn to pick yourself back up again.”

If my past is anything to go on then I’m not too sure I will easily pick myself up, but I suppose I have to start somewhere, so why not here and now? I don’t have much to lose and I could gain a lot.

“Okay.” I breathe deep and try to steady myself. “Yeah, I can do this. It’s going to be fine.”

“Exactly.” Luci squeezes my hand reassuringly and smiles. “I’ll be there for you; you don’t need to worry.”

“L uci, I am worried,” I hiss while raking my fingers through my hair. “And it isn’t going to be fine.”

“Why are you whispering?” she giggles back, her voice crackling a little through the phone.

“Because I’m at work and I don’t want anyone to hear me. This is already crazy enough.?

??

“Addison, you are dating. You’re making it sound like you’re becoming a hooker.”

A heat creeps right the way up through my body. All the way from my toes to my head. I’m probably a frightening shade of red by now. Thank goodness my office door is locked and no one can come in. It’s a shame the same couldn’t be said for the moment I received the dreaded email from Hayley. I was in a meeting with Luke talking about how well Sandra is doing when it arrived and I squealed like a mad person.

I don’t know if Luke will ever view me as a professional again after my stupid stuttering excuse.

“So, you have a date tonight with Harrison…”

“Max,” I correct her.

“Okay, Max then, it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter.”