Like I’d come there to see him, not Griff.
The way he’d shaken a baggie of pills at me…how his friendly face had turned red and petulant when I turned down his invitation to party.
The way he coldly explained the situation to me. “I lost a lot of money on that bet, and Griff always gives me his leftovers.”
Like I was his consolation prize. His due.
“Did he try to…” Griff’s voice brings me back to the present.
I can’t look at him. If I look at him, I’ll cry. So I turn my head away to answer, “Yes.”
Then I’m back in that hallway with ugly realization after ugly realization sinking in. I thought I was falling in love, but Griff was only mind-gaming me this entire time.
The hallway was empty. It was just me and Rowdy—who was now standing between me and the front door. And Griff wasn’t going to help me. In fact, he had only invited me here after he was done with me so that this exact scenario could pop off.
I realized all of that, and then Rowdy reached out and grabbed me.
“I fought him,” I whisper to Griff in the present. “I fought him with everything I had, and I still only barely got away….”
I’m trying to hold them back, but the tears leak anyway. “Afterward, I felt so stupid. I hate-read all these once-and-done articles about you. And I blamed you for lying to me. I let myself believe it was all a lie—that you really were the kind of monster who gave girls to your Reaper friends. But now, I can see you had no idea any of this happened. There’s nobody to blame but me. I’m the one who put myself in that position—I’m the one who was so desperately trying to be someone other than Boring Bernice.”
All the regret, all the memories I’ve been trying to dam up for years…they come crashing down once the barrier of blaming Griff falls. And then there’s no stopping the tears.
“I’m sorry I blamed you. I’m sorry I assumed you were a monster without stopping to give you the benefit of the doubt.”
“No! No! Don’t you apologize to me,” he answers, his voice low and harsh. “You let me have the real you for those two weeks, just like I let you have the real me. You figured out I was lying to you, and you had the courage to come to confront me. None of this is your fault. None of it. The only people to blame are that piece of shit, Rowdy, and me for being such a fucked-up bastard that I wasn’t there when you needed me most.”
Griff pulls me into his chest and crushes me in his arms. “I’m sorry, baby. I’m sorry I didn’t protect you. And I can’t believe you were able to forgive me enough to try to make this marriage work, even thinking I did what I did. This is my fault for being too chickenshit to ask you straight up why you never showed up on New Year’s Eve. I don’t blame you for anything.…”
His absolution washes over me, salve for wounds I thought I’d carry forever. I’ve been doubting myself for years. Wondering if anything I felt in the cabin was real. Now I know, it was.
But, I pull back from his embrace. “You lied to me. You asked me to trust you. We’ve been talking non-stop for weeks. But the whole time you continued to keep things from me. Important things. I didn’t truly trust that you weren’t the monster I thought you were on New Year’s Eve. And you didn’t trust me to know we didn’t absolutely have to get married in order for you to get that CEO job. How is this going to work? It can’t.”
"Red…Bernice…” he starts to says.
“No, let me finish.” I step back, my heart trembling with all this new information. “You get it now. You understand the bond between parent and child. Will you take O2 away from me if I refuse to marry you?”
He stills. And I hold my breath to see who will show up. The man or the monster.
But in the end, he says, “No. I’ll never use her again. She’s my daughter too. And I only want the best for her. Even if that means you don’t want to be with me now that you know you don’t have to.”
I let out a small sigh of relief.
“So now I guess it’s time for me to finally ask you the question I should have asked on New Year’s Eve morning.” He takes me by the chin. Tips my face up to look him directly in his blue gaze. “Do you want me forever like I want you? Will you marry me, and make me the happiest man on Earth?”