Placing my phone back in my pocket, I stretch my arms over my head and catch Ellie watching me.
“What?” I ask.
“I love listening to you talk to your brothers.”
“Why is that?”
She shrugs. “You feel so . . . safe with them, I guess. Like it seems like you can say whatever you want and you know if you called him back right now, no matter how mad he is at you, he’d help you.”
“True,” I state. “He would. Any of them would. Well, maybe not Lincoln right now, but he has an excuse.”
She disappears in a closet and returns in a purple and white robe. I hate her body being covered and away from my sight. It feels like a barrier, a way to keep me out.
“Want to meet up for lunch?” I offer, feeling her out.
“I have a meeting, actually.”
“Dinner? Or we could go fishing.”
“I haven’t been fishing in forever,” she admits. “Probably not since I left for school.”
“Let’s do it then.”
“Maybe some other time.”
“I’m sorry. Did I miss something here?”
She crosses her arms over her chest. “What do you mean?”
I mimic her posture. “I thought we were passed this whole thing.”
“I can have dinner and an orgasm and not lose my mind, Ford.”
“Seeing me again is losing your mind?” I ask in disbelief. “You’re going to have to explain that one, El.”
There’s no attempt to explain, no words thrown my way to demonstrate why she’s now pushing back a little. She just stands there and watches me in that adorable little robe I want to rip off her damn body.
“Fine,” I sigh, stuffing my wallet in my pocket.
“Fine what?”
“I’ll just keep thinking of ways to win you over.”
Her arms drop to her sides. “Stop trying. Just let things be.”
“And risk losing you? Risk letting you think I don’t care? Sorry, babe. Not happening.”
“Listen, I love being with you . . .”
“And I love being with you. So what’s the issue?”
“The issue is just because we had sex doesn’t mean things have somehow changed between us.”
“Babe. Everything has changed.”
The air changes, everything now heavier than it was moments ago. Her eyes are filled with an uncertainty that I want to kiss away.
“I’m not going to lie and pretend I don’t feel something different with you than I’ve felt with anyone else.”