For the first time, I see an ocean of hope in his eyes when he gazes at me. He wants this. He wants this just as badly as I do.
Then suddenly: “You slept on that old thing?”
“Yes. I have the back aches to prove it.”
He takes a breath, then lets it all out. “You know, I feared that taking you for myself would keep you from something, that we’d come to regret it someday. But …” His face softens. “Maybe I had it backwards. Maybe … Maybe I’d regret it if I let a man like you slip through my fingers.”
“You would,” I agree with total sincerity. “I mean, I’m a pretty damned good man. And hot as fuck, too. Not to mention—”
He kisses me, shutting me the hell up. I melt against his body, energy coursing through me at the touch of his lips I so missed.
The tiniest creak of wood causes us to pull apart and turn. At the foot of the deck stands Lance, who has appeared. He smiles at us like a proud father. “Now that’s a sight for sore eyes,” he sings.
Harrison gives me a look. “I guess if we’re gonna do this, we’d better go all the way, then.”
I lift my eyebrows. “How do you mean?”
He takes my hand—and then I understand. My heart races as together, we join Lance, hand-in-hand, and ascend the steps back onto the deck to return to the party—as one.
Chapter 25
Harrison
At first, it’s the most terrifying experience of my life.
All eyes on us.
Everyone notices right away.
Some conversations stop completely. Someone stops chewing their hotdog simply to stare at us. Someone else drops their beer.
It’s like a vacuum just opened up in the air and sucked out all the sound and breath, leaving us with nothing but shock, awe, and complete disbelief.
A tidal wave, held in suspension.
Then it crashes, all the sound of the party returns, and no one seems to pay us mind at all. I wonder if the moment of shock even happened in the first place or if it was all in my head.
“It definitely wasn’t in your head,” says Hoyt later on when we’re getting food together from Billy’s buffet spread inside. “I felt the eyes. I felt the thoughts.”
I’m almost giddy when I chuckle, slapping more sliced meat on my sandwich. “I can’t believe we’re doing this. I feel weightless.”
“Me too.”
It’s almost difficult to conceive, how easy it happened. A mere moment ago, no one knew. Now, everyone at the party does. And that’s enough people to ensure all of Spruce will know by morning. Hell, I’d even give it by the time the sun goes down.
I’ve never felt relief this sweet before.
And—a bit unrelated—I’ve never tasted a sandwich this sweet before. “Damn, this is amazing,” I cry through my mouthful when we’re gathered with all of the others on the deck, holding my plate under my mouth as I serve myself bite after bite. “Billy, what am I tasting in this meat??”
“What I put in all of my meat,” Billy insists. “Love.”
He’s met with a bunch of groans and eye rolls.
Billy frowns at them. “Fine. Bourbon.”
It’s a special experience, lounging around with Hoyt next to me, the pair of us relaxed and unafraid. I can imagine this exact same outcome at the farm, had this happened in a different set of circumstances. I could easily hear Emmalea’s laughter at a joke Hoyt tells, except he’s sitting right next to me on the couch, his arm thrown around my back. I could imagine Turtle singing some corny song about us. There would be no need to hide anymore. No more heart-pounding, fear-infused visits to the horse barn late at night; we could just relax in the comfort of my cabin, in a soft bed, just like that last night we stayed there.
Before everything went sideways.
Now the world feels right again.
But more than right: it feels new. I can’t even compare how I’m feeling right now to any other time in my life. It’s almost like an out-of-body experience. I’m an outsider looking in, marveling at how relaxed we appear, comfortably sharing a wooden lounger together on Tanner and Billy’s deck overlooking the pond and enjoying a summer evening among friends. We’re totally at peace. I’d daresay we’re the happiest we’ve ever been.
Whether I’m an outsider looking at myself or not, one thing is pretty damned clear: I am one lucky fellow.
Trey and Cody take off early, since apparently they have plans with Trey’s dad back home. Before leaving, however, Hoyt makes it a point to speak to the young reverend. “About your big sermon last year, the one about cages and keys, when Lance’s husband came out, uh, I … I just wanted to say thanks for that. And also for giving me the key to, uh, let me out of my own cage or whatever.”