Priceless

The light bulb turns on. Trudy wants to hear a romance story. I lift up my hand and point to the wedding ring that my sister was mocking earlier. “Which is why I’m here. My sister told me about this place and how everything here is made from the heart. I want to give this to my wife as a token of how much I adore her and worship the very ground her tiny feet walk on.” The saccharine words almost make me want to vomit, but Trudy seems to like it. Her dour look is growing sweeter by the second.

She reaches below the counter and lays a couple of breathtakingly beautiful pieces on the velvet mat. Julia is right. Mom will love this. “The necklace didn’t feel right for you but maybe we have something else. What’s your wife’s name?”

My brain goes blank. No one ever asks me her name. They ask me my name. They ask me how big my bank account is. They ask me my dick size but no woman has ever asked about my wife’s name. I draw a hand over my jaw. “Her name. Right. Sadie. Sadie Jones.”

Trudy’s eyes narrow. “You hesitated. When I asked for your wife’s name, you didn’t answer right away.” She whisks the jewelry away. “You can go now. There’s nothing here for you.” She directs a look over my shoulder. “George, this man is done.”

A hulking bodyguard ambles over to me. He’s got about thirty pounds on me but I could probably take him. I have my sweater sleeve shoved halfway up my left forearm before common sense sets in. I’m in the middle of Brooklyn in a jewelry store. I don’t need to get in a fight here. I’m Major Bennington. I flick down the sweater, nod my head at the bodyguard and turn back to Trudy.

“Where’s the owner?”

“T-T-he owner?” Trudy stutters.

“Yeah. The woman who makes this shit?”

There’s a chorus of outraged gasps. “Did you just call Maple London’s work shit?” Trudy cries. “This is art. Maple’s work is art.”

God save me from artistic types. I swear to God, they’re as temperamental as horses and not even close to being as useful. There’s a velvet curtained doorway just behind Trudy and to the right. Above it a discreet red light flashes, indicating a security camera. I brush by the lady in the chair, stride past a shocked Trudy who is yelling, “Sir, sir” and the bodyguard who is hurrying to catch me. I give him a stiff arm that sends him reeling backward into the curtain while I keep going forward until a vision, a literal fucking vision, stops me in my tracks.

“What are you doing?” snaps the beauty in front of me.

“Falling in love,” I grin, giving her the full wattage.

“Get out,” she replies, apparently immune to the smile.

So this is what love is like, I think. A lightning bolt to the heart. I slap a hand over my chest and laugh. Whew. Who knew? My blood starts to race through my veins. My heart thunders. My dick grows two sizes too big for the stupid baggy pants my sister sent over.

“Sorry, Maple, I’ll get rid of him,” mumbles the bodyguard.

I throw up a hand. “Dude, don’t get in the way of true love here. I’m about to propose to Maple and I don’t need an audience for when she turns me down.” I slap one of the big bills from my wallet into his hand. “Thanks for the brotherly solidarity.”

He’s dumbfounded into silence, which makes it easy to slam the door in his face. I lean against it, cross my arms, and stare at my future wife. “So, Maple, what’s your favorite rock?”

“What?” Her small face is covered in confusion.

“Your favorite stone. Diamond? Emerald? Ruby? I need to know so I can get the right engagement ring for you. Although you are a jeweler so maybe you want to make it yourself? I don’t really know how that works. I guess I could call my sister.”

“Sir. You can’t marry me. You are already married.”

It takes me a moment before I recall that I have the wedding ring on my finger. I raise my hand. “Are you talking about this? I just wear it so that the hungry ladies down on Wall Street target some other poor sap.”

“You must think marriage is a mockery to pretend that you’re married and then waltz in here and propose to a woman you don’t even know!”

“Babe, this is my first interaction with the whole love at first sight thing. I don’t know how the rules work.” I spread my hands. “I just know that you’re mine.”

“It’ll be a cold day in hell before I belong to anyone, particularly you.”

“Good thing I’m rich enough to buy you a fur coat.”

Chapter 4

Maple

I stare up at what may be one of the most handsome faces that I’ve ever laid eyes upon. Too bad he’s a big jerk. He is the stereotypical Wall Street businessman who thinks everything’s his for the taking. I’m not sure whether to laugh at his arrogance or call the cops. The one thing I’m not willing to do is sell him anything in my store or waste any more of my precious time listening to his love at first sight nonsense. He must think I was born yesterday if he for one second believes I’m buying anything that comes from his mouth. He was willing to try any angle to get what he wanted.