A Day of Ruin

Chapter 16

Harlow

Thedingofthe little metal bell on the door was chiming quickly as people moved in and out of the glass entrance. I wrinkled my nose, staring at the sign above the door, hesitant and trying to pump myself up to go inside.

“Come on, Harlow. You’re being a drama llama.”

I threw an exasperated glare at Lily as she stood to the side, arms crossed watching me with amusement.

“What?” she exclaimed, a smirk on her face. “It’s just a coffee shop. You like coffee. Honestly, this should be easy. It’s either this or cemetery attendant.”

I gasped as I was shoved to the side by a middle aged woman with ginormous bed hair and ripped pantyhose. She grumbled as she burst inside the shop, the bell causing my face to twitch.

“People aren’t going to want me to make their coffee. See!” I said, dramatically gesturing my hand towards the now closed door.

Lily rolled her eyes. “Harlow, she just wanted coffee. I sincerely doubted she even knew who you were right now. Babe looked like she has had a rough night and just needs a big fuck-off cup of caffeine. In fact, I’d say by providing coffee you probably have a good chance at mending some of the animosity people have towards you.”

My face flattened as I stared at her. “It’s not animosity, Lily. It’s blind hate. Literal fucking hate.”

“Regardless,” Lily pressed on, a smile on her face, “... money. And free coffee. Seriously, are you contemplating cemetery attendant?”

I rubbed my temple awkwardly. “A little bit... at least it would be quiet.”

“Yeah, dead quiet.”

“Lily!”

“What? Do you even know how to fight off zombies if there’s an apocalypse? I bet not.”

Ding ding.

Stomping my feet towards the door, I threw my hands up in defeat. “Fine! I’ll do the stupid job interview. But only because there might be coffee.”

I returned home after the interview, nerves fried as I waited anxiously to hear if I had the job or not.

It had been awhile since I had done an interview, but I was always quite good at them. But it’s hard to be confident when there’s a biased view of you before you’ve even tried to sell yourself. Lucky for me, the coffee shop was a franchise of a bigger company, and the manager that interviewed me was younger than I am. In fact, he seemed bored and unfazed all together about who I was. This had to be the first time minimum wage had actually helped someone.

My stomach grumbled with hunger but I pushed the thought of food aside, too stressed to eat. The pain of hunger was starting to become a comfort and as the days passed, I felt my clothes getting looser. I hated to think that something like starvation was making me feel better – but if anything, it made me feel like I was in control. And with everything else spiralling down, I was grasping at anything I could control.

My Spotify playlist was on in the background as I laid on my bed, staring at the ceiling. It was surprisingly quiet, even the city below more still than usual.

I was just contemplating a nap when a knock sounded on my bedroom door. I immediately sat up, confused because as far as I knew, Dex wasn’t home. We had, once again, gone back to ignoring each other. Though this time the lingering feelings were confusion, as opposed to disdain. I struggled to look at the couch whenever I walked past it and my mind was a clusterfuck of mixed emotions as I tried to figure out what all this meant.

Did I like him? Did he like me? The foundation of our fornication was hatred.... or was it?

Pushing up, I hesitantly walked to the door, swinging it open slowly. My eyes widened in surprise and shock as I found Finn standing there.

“Finn?”

His caramel eyes blinked at me in reply, as if he also couldn’t believe he was seeing me. I mean, despite the fact he had knocked on my bedroom door.

“Harlow, hey...” he said, shifting in the door frame. “I was just dropping in to see Dex to go over some business shit and wanted to see how you were doing.”

Movement behind him caught my attention and I fought back the urge to blush as I spotted Dex on the couch looking suspiciously at the wall. He wouldn’t meet my gaze and I quickly looked back at Finn to avoid looking guilty. Or drawing attention to the couch.

“I’m doing fine. Like I said, was just a bit hungry and tired that day.”

Finn pursed his lips, his frame tensing as he looked me over. “No offence ...” he started, “but you look like you’ve lost more weight.”

I nodded. “Yes, I started a new diet.”

“Oh, what is it?”

I crossed my arms. “The Nunya diet.”

Finn’s eyes narrowed. “The what?”

“Nunya business, Finn. Seriously, is that all?”

I jumped as Finn growled and slammed his hand on the door frame, my sarcastic composure instantly diminishing.

“What the hell is your deal, Har? Why are you being such a goddamn bitch to me?”

Behind him, I caught sight of Dex looking over, the sudden tempo of emotions bringing him out of his wall fascination.

“I...” I stuttered, caught off guard, my eyes meeting Dex’s concerned ones.

Finn stared at me, eyebrows raised as he waited for an answer. My heart started to race as guilt reared its head as I met his eyes.

I could still see it. The boy I fell in love with.

Except he wasn’t a boy anymore. He was a man. And physically – fucking hell, what a man.

But somewhere along the way my heart had been smashed by everyone and anything, and while it wasn’t his fault he had to leave me, he was the first person to ever break my heart. And with all the trust issues and hate that was thrown my way, I couldn’t help but feel defensive like he had ulterior motives. Or that I would let him in, and he’d leave me again... just like everyone else.

Just like he did before.

Not to mention he was a bloody personal trainer. His bulging arms and thick thighs commanded attention and it was bad enough having Dex’s somewhat decent looking body in my face. Another one was too much. It was causing my brain to malfunction and short-circuit.

He could never be interested in me anyway. He probably liked fit girls – the ones who could deadlift properly without bending their knees too far and wore booty shorts and crop tops.

I was lucky to find a crop top that kept my damn boobs in check. They were likely to swing out and cause injury.

“Harlow.”