H is for Hawk (Men of ALPHAbet Mountain)

“You’re welcome. I’m glad I was able to help and make you feel a little bit better about taking care of her.”

“You made me feel a lot more than a little bit better,” he said.

He paused, realizing how strange that sentence sounded. We looked at each other and laughed.

“I get it,” I said.

We headed toward the door and paused just in front of it. I could feel a tug between us, something that made me wish the moment could continue on, that we wouldn’t have to say good night quite yet.

“I know you came over to help me get the hang of taking care of Rose, but I really enjoyed spending time with you,” Hawk said. “It was great seeing you again after all this time.”

I really hoped he didn’t notice the flush that went across my cheeks when he said that. I nodded.

“It was,” I said.

“Maybe we could spend some more time together,” he said. He seemed to catch what he said and quickly chased the words. “I mean, since I’m going to be taking care of Rose for… well, for as long as I’m going to be taking care of her. And I’m sure there will be more things I need to know.”

I let out a short laugh and nodded. “There may be another thing or two you should learn about taking care of babies. I can help you with them.” And then it happened. I didn’t mean it to. I didn’t even realize the words were going through my mind until I heard them come out of my mouth. “You should come with me to Malia and Gerry’s wedding.”

I couldn’t even believe I just said that. Where did that come from? I hadn’t even been thinking about the wedding. And I definitely wasn’t thinking about asking Hawk out. Yet, there it was. It just popped out of my mouth before I had a chance to stop it, and there was no way for me to scoop the words out of the air and stuff them back down before they got to Hawk’s ears.

“Your sister’s wedding?” he asked.

I couldn’t really decipher what emotion was in that reaction, but I was already stammering trying to figure out how to gracefully get myself out of this awkward moment. Leave it to me to have a really nice time with this guy and then fall directly on my face in the last thirty seconds I was at his house for the evening.

“You know, because you’re raising a baby now, so you should have all the fun of finding childcare and worrying about her while you are out at an event,” I said, hoping to play it off like I was just joking.

Hawk was smiling at me, and I couldn’t tell if he was smiling because he thought I was ridiculous for asking or because I sounded like so much of an idiot trying to stumble over covering up the spontaneous invitation.

“I’d love to,” he said.

I paused, sure I hadn’t heard him correctly. “What?”

“To go to the wedding with you,” Hawk said. “I’d love to.”

“You would?”

He nodded. “Absolutely. I think it will be a lot of fun.”

That fierce blush came to my cheeks again, and I glanced away before smiling at him.

“Alright. We’ll go together.”

“Great. I’m looking forward to it,” Hawk said.

I needed to get out of there before things got more complicated. I said good night and got out to my car as fast as I could without breaking into a run. He was standing at the door watching me, so I couldn’t just sit there behind the wheel trying to get myself together the way I wanted to. Instead, I kept smiling and waved at him.

I went straight home and took a long shower before climbing into bed. I was so tired I thought I would just drop right off to sleep, but I couldn’t. Instead, I just lay there staring up at the ceiling, thinking over the day.

When I’d gotten to work that morning, I’d had no idea what was ahead of me. It wouldn’t have even crossed my mind that my day would stretch on this long and would include spending hours with Hawk teaching him to take care of an abandoned newborn. It was so much to pack into a day, it felt like the time must have been stretched out over far longer than that.

Then, I’d gone and asked Hawk out. The man who had dominated my thoughts throughout high school, then broke my heart. I just came right out and asked him to go to my sister’s wedding with me.

And he said yes. That was the kicker. He actually sounded excited by the chance. I was supposed to be focusing on my career and getting my life off the ground. Definitely not adding any more stress or responsibility to my life.