Kiara rolls her eyes at our other bestie. “I’m not saying that she isn’t pretty, Sarah. But it’s time to show Darrius what he’s been missing all this time. You’ll admit that every single one of Darrius’ girlfriends so far isn’t the girl next-door type. He likes flashy and a little slutty. Little cardigans and matching headbands don’t attract his attention.”
Kiara has a point. “Maybe you’re right. He always goes for the popular types.” My friend is emboldened by my admission and charges on. “Duh! And you have to be braver when you’re with him, Len. You need to make your move, or he’ll never know how you feel about him.”
We’ve had this conversations a million times and we never agree. “There’s too much at stake, Kiara,” I complain. “Darrius has been my best friend since we were kids and our fathers flew together. Kyle was so devastated when Papà died that he quitted skydiving the next day. But he’s never stopped Darrius from pursuing his passion and from being a part of the Angels ever since he was old enough to jump. Darrius has grown up in my house more than in his own, he calls my mom ‘Mom’. If he doesn’t feel the same way I do, I won’t just lose him as a friend, I’ll put Papà’s team at risk. Mom keeps saying that Darrius is the most talented skydiver she’s ever seen since Papà. If he doesn’t love me the same way I do, he might find being an Angel too much.”
Sarah shakes her head. “That’s ridiculous, Lenley. It’s true that if he doesn’t love you the way you want, things might be awkward, but I don’t think Darrius is stupid enough to destroy a lifelong friendship.”
Kiara nods. “Sarah’s right. Plus, the Cove Angels are the most prestigious team on this side of the pond. Where else would Darrius go?”
Sarah shrugs. “Well, there’s that new team in town that moved here from Texas. The Cove Devils.”
Kiara laughs. “Right, whatever! Those guys talk a big game but what have they ever won? Last time I checked, they came third in their State championship last year and didn’t even make it to Nationals. I don’t think coming here to compete with the Angels is a smart move.”
We can all agree on that. “True. Despite never winning another World Championship since Papà, the Angels have always placed well at Nationals. Mom has worked so hard to keep Dad’s legacy alive and Patrick De Laurent is still a huge name in the skydiving and BASE jumping world.”
Kiara folds her arms over her chest. “You’re damn right. That’s why, even if things don’t work out between the two of you romantically, I’m sure that Darrius wouldn’t leave the Angels. So stop being a pussy, if you want to get him in your pussy!”
Sarah pushes her with a horrified giggle. “Ew! Do you have to always be so gross? Maybe let’s start with getting a birthday kiss. You have to learn how to walk before you start running.”
Kiara stands up, grabbing my biceps and pinning me in place with her dark brown gaze. “That’s exactly the problem, Len. He’ll never see you as a potential girlfriend if he doesn’t know you’re interested. And he won’t know you’re interested if you don’t make a move.”
I feel butterflies fluttering their wings in the pit of my stomach at the idea of kissing him. I’ve been waiting for that my entire life. “Maybe you’re right,” I concede. “I’ve been saving myself for him. I’ve never even kissed anyone because I can’t bear the thought of being with anyone else.”
Kiara tightens her hold on my arms, shaking me a little. “And I’ve been telling you that that’s really dumb. Look, I get it, you’re in love with him. I mean, I don’t even blame you, he’s one of the hottest guys in town. But that’s exactly the problem, Len. You’re always there, watching him date one girl after the other and stepping right in when he dumps his flavor of the month and he’s bored. You get your hopes up that each time is the time he’ll look at you and really see you, but he never does. And he forgets about you the moment he has a new piece of ass to chase.”
Her words hurt because they are partially true. “But he cares about me, Kiara. We spend time together; we talk about everything. He calls me every night to wish me sweet dreams.”
Kiara snorts, looking straight into my eyes, her face so close to mine that the tips of our noses are almost touching. “That’s where you totally fuck up, dude! He gets his dick wet wherever he wants, fucking the dozens of groupies who hang around him and then he gets the ‘girlfriend non-sexual side of the experience’ from you. You have to admit that he gets to have his cake and eat it too and that you’re allowing him to do that, even if it hurts you.”
I hate to hear Kiara’s words but she isn’t wrong. “But what am I supposed to do? Telling him no when he wants to hang out? I care about him,” I protest.
Kiara nods. “That’s exactly what you’re supposed to do. You need to show him how important you are to him; even if by making him miss you.”
She has a point but I’m not sure I can do that. “What if he moves on if I’m not there for him and I lose him as a friend too?” Just the idea makes tears burn behind my eyelids.
Kiara throws her hands in the air in a frustrated huff, I should’ve expected it. “Then he wasn’t your fucking friend to begin with, Len! As it is, he’s ‘breadcrumbing’ you, so I don’t think you have a lot to lose.”
Sarah looks at Kiara with the same confusion I’m feeling. “Bread-what?”
Kiara sighs again. “Breadcrumbing you. He keeps you interested and hooked on him by giving up small amounts of time here and there and putting minimum effort into your relationship. Just enough to make you think he cares and keep you from telling him to fuck off. But you aren’t one of his priorities. You’re there whenever he needs you or when he’s bored, but his team, his girls, his other friends, even his fucking car are more important than you.”
Fuck.