Me:
I’m sorry. There, is that better?
Colby:
Yes, I was especially touched when you asked if it was better. Thank you, I could feel you meant those words. Consider yourself forgiven.
I nearly threw my phone in frustration.
Me:
Sarcasm? How rare coming from you. Even in text form you just can’t seem to help yourself, can you?
Colby:
Not when it comes to you, no. Wanna know what your name is on my phone?
Me:
I’m dying with curiosity.
Colby:
Ah sarcasm, coming from Ripped Pants, that’s your name in my phone. Every night I go to sleep and imagine taking scissors to your closet. It’s soothing.
Me:
Sorry, all I caught was that every night when you go to sleep you imagine me…
Colby:
Stabbing you, or wait, your clothes, sorry, finger slipped…
Me:
And we’re back to the…
Colby:
I think my point was made.
Me:
If you say so…
Colby:
AHHHHHH
Me:
What’s for dinner?
Colby:
I’d hide the knives, fair warning.
Me: