After I got in, I pulled the covers up over both of us and lay on my side so I could see her. She started to turn to me, but then stopped and cussed under her breath.
“What?”
“I hate lying on my back. I’m normally a side sleeper.”
“Me too.” As I faced her, I could feel the heat from her skin. It hadn’t been quite light enough to see what she was wearing, but I suspected it was one of the new dresses that she’d gotten. They worked well for someone with a full leg cast, and I believed she’d been using them as both a dress and a nightgown and then getting the kids to throw them in the hamper when they needed it. It was clever, but I had to admit I missed helping her get dressed. “Can’t you sleep on your side with the bad leg on top?”
Belatedly, the phrase on top sounded dirty to me, especially since I was under the covers with a beautiful young woman for the first time in a very long time.
“I’ve tried,” she said. “But the heaviness of the cast throws me off balance. As soon as I start to drift off, I lose my balance and start to roll forward or backwards. That makes me wake up feeling like I’m about to fall off a cliff or something.”
I’d had dreams that ended with that feeling—it wasn’t fun. “Can you sleep on your stomach?”
“No, I’ve never been able to do that. And that position somehow puts more pressure on the cast than being on my back. I’m not sure of the physics of it, but it is what it is.”
My heart went out to her. She’d been through so much, and everything was harder when you couldn’t sleep. I wanted to take her hand, like I had that day after our exercise session, but in the dark, I couldn’t be quite sure what I’d be grabbing. “Is there anything I can do to help?”
She angled her head toward me, and I caught the scent of citrus from her shampoo. “Could we talk a bit until I get sleepy?”
That made me chuckle. “Are you saying I’m boring?”
“It might help me sleep if you were,” she said solemnly before giggling.
I grinned. It was nice, talking with someone in the dark. Feeling the heat from their body. Noticing the way the covers shifted when they moved. “Why don’t you tell me about your job? That should be boring enough. Not everyone has two cool jobs like me.”
She chuckled lightly, but then stilled. “I’m not sure I know enough to talk about it.”
“You’ll catch up.”
“I’m not sure. Sometimes, I sit in on video meetings, and each time, I’m less certain of what’s going on than the last. It’s like they’re all going forward and I’m standing still.” She was silent for a few beats. “I guess I literally am.”
“Well, then, it’ll be like you’re new when you go back there. You were new on your first day and that wasn’t so bad, was it?” I winced after I said it, hoping she wouldn’t dwell on the part where she’d ended up in the hospital at the end of that day.
“True, but I wasn’t the only newbie. There were five of us, and now the others will seem like seasoned pros by the time I get back.”
“You’ll only be a month or two behind.” I didn’t want to downplay her concern, but I hated the idea that her amazingly selfless act had hurt her career.
“I know, but I’ll be the only one starting out at the beginning again.”
“True.” Dammit, I wished there was something I could do. “Can I hold your hand?”
Alyssa seemed surprised, but then she nodded, sliding her hand across the mattress. “You really take the concept of consent seriously.”
That made me chuckle. “I had to ask so that I would know where to find it.” My fingers grasped hers, and somehow, it felt right.
Alyssa was silent for a while, her hand firmly in mine. I wondered if she was finally getting sleepy, but when she spoke, her voice was strong and alert. “It’s not just falling behind,” she said. “I mean, it’s not just about not knowing what’s going on at work. It also feels like the other four are friends now, and I’m the odd woman out.”
“I’m sorry, cher.” I cradled her hand in both of mine and tried to convey my empathy.
“They go to bars after work and eat lunch together. And during the video chats, there are inside jokes and nicknames and references that I’ve missed out on.” She hesitated. “I guess that sounds dumb, like a high schooler left out of the in-group.”
“It doesn’t sound dumb at all. It sounds like a very normal reaction.”
Alyssa sighed. “They’re taking a trip, the four of them. A long weekend in New Orleans.”