Awakened (House of Night 8)

Zoey

I didn't have to look hard to find her. Neferet was standing on the steps of Nyx's Temple, off to my left.

As everyone turned to whisper and stare at her, I felt Stark move to my side, so that it would only take one quick motion for him to come between Neferet and me. I was also aware of Stevie Rae. Suddenly she was there on my other side, and from the corners of my vision I could see the Twins and even Damien. My circle of friends surrounded me, letting me know wordlessly that they had my back.

When Neferet began to walk toward me I automatically began centering myself. I thought, She must have gone totally, utterly insane to ask me to perform the funeral and then attack me in front of the entire school. But sane or insane, it really didn't matter. She was evil and dangerous and coming against me, and I Was Not Going To Run. So her next words shocked me almost as much as what she began to do.

"Hear me, Zoey Redbird, Fledgling High Priestess, and bear witness. I have wronged Nyx and you and this House of Night."

Her voice was strong and clear and beautiful, and it seemed to make music in the air around her. In the tempo she was creating, Neferet began to take her clothes off.

It should have been embarrassing or uncomfortable or erotic, but it wasn't any of those things. It was simply beautiful.

"I have lied to you and to my Goddess." Her shirt came off, fluttering behind her like a petal falling from a rose. "I have deceived you and my Goddess about my intentions." She unwrapped the black silk skirt she was wearing and stepped out of it as if it were a pool of dark water. Completely naked, she walked directly up to me. The purple and yellow flames of Jack's pyre flickered against her flesh, making her look like she, too, burned, only without being consumed. When she reached me she dropped to her knees, threw back her head, and opened her arms, saying, "Worst of all, I allowed a man to seduce me away from the love of my Goddess and her Path. Now here, bared to you, our House of Night, and to Nyx, I ask to be forgiven for my wrongdoings, for I find that I cannot live this terrible lie another moment." As she finished speaking she lowered her head and her arms and then formally, respectfully, deeply, Neferet bowed to me.

In the complete silence that followed her pronouncement my mind whirred in a cacophony of conflicting thoughts: She's pretending--I wish she wasn't--it's because of her that Heath and Jack are dead--She's a master manipulator. Trying to figure out what I should say--what I should do--I looked around, helplessly, for some clue. The Twins and Damien were staring openmouthed at Neferet, totally shocked. I glanced at Aphrodite. She was staring at Neferet, too, but the look on her face was open disgust. Stevie Rae and Stark were both looking at me. Ever so slightly, without saying a word, Stark shook his head once, no. I looked from him to Stevie Rae, who mouthed two words to me: she lies. Hardly breathing, I glanced around the circle made by the House of Night. Some were looking at me questioningly, expectantly, but most of them were gawking at Neferet in awe, openly sobbing with what was obviously a mixture of happiness and relief.

At that moment, one thought crystallized and sliced daggerlike through all of the others in my mind: If I don't accept her apology the school will turn against me. I'll look like a vindictive brat, and that is exactly what Neferet wants.

I had no choice. All I could do was react and hope my friends trusted me enough to know that I could tell the difference between truth and manipulation.

"Stark, give me your shirt," I said quickly. He didn't hesitate. He unbuttoned it and handed it to me.

Being sure my voice still carried the power of spirit with it I said to her, "Neferet, for myself I forgive you. I never wanted to be your enemy." She looked up at me; her green eyes were absolutely guileless.

"Zoey, I--," she began.

I spoke over her, cutting off the sweet sound of her voice. "But I can only speak for myself. You'll have to seek the Goddess for her forgiveness. Nyx knows your heart and your soul, so it's there that you'll find her answer."

"Then I already have it, and it fills my heart and soul with joy. Thank you, Zoey Redbird, and thank you, House of Night!"

There were murmurs all around the circle of "Thank the Goddess!" and "Blessed be!" I made myself smile as I bent and wrapped Stark's shirt around her shoulders. "Please, get up. You shouldn't be on your knees in front of me."

Neferet stood gracefully, and put on Stark's shirt, buttoning it carefully. Then she turned to Damien. "Merry meet, Damien. May I have your permission to send my personal prayer for Jack's spirit up to the Goddess?" Damien didn't speak. He just nodded, and I couldn't tell through the sadness and grief on his face whether he believed Neferet's show or not. She continued to act her part perfectly.

"Thank you." Neferet stepped closer to Jack's fiery pyre, put her head back, and lifted her arms. Unlike me, she didn't amplify her voice. Instead she spoke so softly that none of us could hear her. Her face was tilted just right so that I had a perfect view of it. Her expression was serene and sincere, and I wondered how it was possible that something I was sure was so rotten inside could have such a gorgeous outside.

I think it was because I was staring at her so hard, trying to find the chink in her armor, that I saw all of what happened next.

Neferet's expression changed. Her face was still tilted up, but it was obvious, at least to me, that she'd seen something above us. Then I heard it. It was a kinda familiar sound. I didn't recognize it right away, even though it made the hairs on my arms rise. I didn't look up, though. I kept watching Neferet. Whatever she was looking at was annoying and worrying her. She didn't change her posture or stop speaking her "prayer," but her eyes did dart around as if she was checking to see if anyone else had noticed what she'd seen. I snapped my eyelids shut and hoped that I looked like I was praying, meditating, concentrating--anything but watching her. I gave it a couple of seconds, then slowly opened my eyes.

Neferet definitely wasn't looking at me. She was staring at Stevie Rae, but my BFF wasn't aware of it. Stevie Rae was too busy gawking straight up, too. Only her expression wasn't annoyed or worried--it was radiant, as if she was looking at something that filled her with utter happiness, utter love. Confused, I looked back at Neferet. She was still watching Stevie Rae, and her expression had shifted again. I saw her eyes widen, as if in realization, and then her face was suffused with pleasure, like what she'd just figured out had made her super happy.

I couldn't seem to take my eyes off Neferet, but I was reaching for Stark's hand automatically, as if I knew my world was getting ready to explode when Dragon Lankford's voice was a clarion call that changed everything.

"Raven Mocker above! Professors, get the fledglings under cover! Warriors, to me!" Time started to move in fast-forward then. Stark pushed me behind him while he stared upward. I heard him curse, and I knew it had to be because he didn't have his bow with him.

"I want you to get into Nyx's Temple!" Stark shouted above the sound exploding around us, already moving me in that direction.

Over his shoulder I could see the pandemonium that had broken out. Some of the kids were screaming; professors were calling to their students and trying to reassure them; Sons of Erebus Warriors had weapons drawn, ready for the coming battle.

Everyone was moving except Neferet and Stevie Rae. Neferet was still standing beside Jack's burning pyre--still staring at Stevie Rae and smiling. Stevie Rae looked like she'd been rooted to her spot. She was gazing upward, shaking her head back and forth, back and forth, and she was sobbing.

"No, wait," I told Stark, moving around him so he quit pushing me toward the temple. "I can't go. Stevie Rae is--"

"FALL FROM THE SKY, FOUL BEAST!"

Neferet's shout cut me off. She'd flung her arms up, fingers outstretched like she was trying to grab something out of the air.

"Can you see that?" Stark asked me urgently, staring up at the sky.

"What? See what?"

"Black, sticky, threads of Darkness." He grimaced in horror. "She's using them. And that means she was lying her ass off about asking for forgiveness," he said grimly. "She's definitely still allied with Darkness."

Then there wasn't time to say any more because, with a terrible scream, an enormous Raven Mocker fell from the sky, landing in a heap in the middle of the school grounds. I recognized him right away. It was Rephaim, Kalona's favored son.

"Kill it!" Neferet commanded.

Dragon Lankford didn't need the order. He was already moving. Blade flashing in the firelight, he descended on the Raven Mocker like an avenging god.

"No! Don't hurt him!" Stevie Rae screamed and hurled herself between Dragon and the fallen creature. Her arms were raised, palms outward, and she was glowing green, like her body had suddenly grown iridescent moss. Dragon hit the glowy green barrier and bounced off it like he'd smacked into a giant rubber ball. It was creepy and cool at the same time.

"Ah, hell," I murmured, already moving toward Stevie Rae. I had a bad feeling about what was going on. A really, really bad feeling.

Stark didn't try to stop me. He just said, "Stay close to me and out of that damn bird's reach."

"Why are you protecting this creature, Stevie Rae? Are you in league with it?" Neferet was standing beside Dragon, who had gotten back on his feet and was literally trembling with the effort it took not to rush against Stevie Rae again. Neferet sounded baffled, but her eyes flashed fiercely, like she was a cat and Stevie Rae was her trapped mouse.

Stevie Rae ignored Neferet. She looked at Dragon and said, "He's not here to hurt anyone. I promise."

"Free me, Red One." The Raven Mocker spoke as I finally reached Dragon and Neferet. He, too, had gotten to his feet, which surprised me because it seemed that the fall should have killed him. Actually, the only evidence I could see of him being hurt at all was a gash in his disturbingly human- looking bicep that was just beginning to weep blood. He was backing slowly away from Stevie Rae, but a weird green bubble had formed around them, and it wouldn't let him get very far from her.

"It's no good, Rephaim. I'm not gonna lie and pretend anymore." Stevie Rae glanced at Neferet and at the crowd of fledglings and professors who had stopped running away and instead were watching her, shock and horror clear on their faces.

Then, setting her jaw and lifting her chin, Stevie Rae looked back at the Raven Mocker. "I'm not that good of an actress. I don't ever want to be that good of an actress."

"Do not do this."

The Raven Mocker's voice shocked me. It wasn't because he sounded human. I'd heard him speak before and knew that, if he wasn't hissing in anger, he could talk like a guy. What shocked me was the tone of his voice. He sounded scared and very, very sad.

"It's already done," Stevie Rae told him.

And that's when I finally found my voice. "What in the hell is going on, Stevie Rae?"

"I'm sorry, Z. I wanted to tell you. I really, really wanted to. I just didn't know how." Stevie Rae's eyes pleaded with me to understand.

"Didn't know how to tell me what?"

Then it hit me--the smell of the Raven Mocker's blood. With a rush of horror, I knew the scent of it. It had been on Stevie Rae before, and I realized what she was talking about, what she'd been trying to tell me.

"You've Imprinted with that creature." I was thinking the words, but Neferet was the one who said them out loud.

"Oh, Goddess, no, Stevie Rae," I said, my lips feeling cold and numb. Disbelieving, I kept shaking my head back and forth like denial could make this whole nightmare go away.

"How?" The words sounded ripped from Dragon.

"It was not her fault," the Raven Mocker said. "I am responsible." "Do not speak to me, monster." Dragon sounded deadly.

The Raven Mocker's red-tinged gaze moved from the Sword Master to me. "Do not blame her, Zoey Redbird."

"Why are you talking to me?" I yelled at it. Still shaking my head I looked at Stevie Rae. "How could you have let this happen?" I asked, and then clamped my mouth shut as I realized how much I suddenly sounded like my mother.

"Holy shit. I knew something freaky was going on with you, Stevie Rae, but I had no clue about a weirdness of this degree," Aphrodite said, coming up beside me.

"I shoulda said somethin'," Kramisha said from several feet away where she was standing beside the Twins and Damien, who were all staring disbelievingly back and forth from Stevie Rae to the Raven Mocker. "I knew them poems 'bout a beast and you and such was bad. I just didn't know they was literal."

"Because of the alliance between these two, Darkness has already tainted the school," Neferet said solemnly. "This creature must be responsible for Jack's death."

"That's a bunch of hogwash!" Stevie Rae said.

"You killed Jack as a sacrifice to Darkness 'cause it gave you control of Kalona's soul. You know it. I know it. And Rephaim knows it. That's why he was up there watching you from a distance. He wanted to be sure you didn't do anything too terrible tonight."

I watched Stevie Rae stand up to Neferet and recognized the strength and the hopelessness I saw in my BFF, because I'd felt both things the times I'd stood up to Neferet, too--especially back when it was just me against her and an entire school full of vamps and fledglings had no clue that she was anything less than perfect.

"He has utterly twisted her," Neferet said, speaking to the regathering crowd. "They should both be destroyed at once." My gut lurched and, with a certainty I felt only when I was being Goddess- led, I knew I had to do something.

"Okay, that's enough." With Stark moving restlessly at my side and keeping his gaze trained on the birdguy, I moved closer to Stevie Rae. "You gotta know how bad this looks."

"Yeah, I do."

"And you really are Imprinted with him?"

"Yeah, I am," she said firmly.

"Did he attack you or something?" I asked, trying to make some sense of it.

"No, Z, the opposite. He saved my life. Twice."

"Of course he did. You're in league with the creature and allied with Darkness!" Neferet turned to face the watching fledglings and vampyres.

The green glow surrounding Stevie Rae intensified as did her voice. "Rephaim saved me from Darkness. He was why I survived accidentally invoking the white bull. And just because most of these folks can't see what you're doing, don't ever forget that I can. I see the threads of Darkness that follow your command."

"You sound very familiar with that subject," Neferet said.

" 'Course I am," Stevie Rae said angrily. "Before Aphrodite's sacrifice I was filled with Darkness. I'll always recognize it; just like I'll always choose Light over it." "Really?" Neferet's smile was smug. "And that's what you're doing when you choose this creature? Choosing Light? Raven Mockers were created in anger and violence and hatred. They live for death and destruction. This one killed Anastasia Lankford. How can that be mistaken for Light and the Path of the Goddess?"

"It was wrong." Rephaim wasn't speaking to Neferet. He was looking directly at Stevie Rae. "What I was before I knew you was wrong. Then you found me and pulled me from a dark place." I held my breath as the Raven Mocker slowly, gently, touched Stevie Rae's cheek, wiping a tear away.

"You showed me kindness and for a little while I glimpsed happiness. That is enough for me. Release me, Stevie Rae, my Red One. Let them exact their vengeance upon me. Perhaps Nyx will take pity on my spirit and allow me to enter her realm where someday I will see you again."

Stevie Rae shook her head. "No. I can't. I won't. If I'm yours then you're mine, too. I'm not gonna let you go without a fight."

"Does that mean you'll fight your friends for him?" I shouted at her, feeling like everything was spinning out of control.

Calmly, Stevie Rae looked at me. I saw the answer in her eyes before she spoke in a sad butfirm voice. "If I have to, I will." And then she said the one thing--the only thing--that finally made sense of the whole crazy mess, and it changed everything for me. "Zoey, you would have fought anyone to protect me when I was filled with Darkness, even when you didn't know for sure if I'd ever be myself again. He's already Changed, Z. He's turned from Darkness. How can I do any less for him?"

"That thing killed my mate!" Dragon bellowed.

"For that, as well as for a multitude of other offenses, he must die," Neferet said. "Stevie Rae, if you choose to stand with the creature, then you choose to stand against the House of Night, and you will deserve to perish with him."

"Okay, no. Hang on," I said. "Sometimes things aren't just black and white, and there's more than one right answer. Dragon, I know this is terrible for you, but let's all just take a breath and step back for a second. You can't really be talking about killing Stevie Rae."

"If she stands with Darkness she deserves the same fate as the creature," Neferet said.

"Oh, please. You just admitted that you stood with Darkness, and Zoey forgave you for it," Aphrodite said. "I'm not saying that I'm cool with this whole birdboy/Stevie Rae weirdness, but how can it be okay for you to get forgiveness, but not okay for those two?"

"Because I no longer am under the influence of Darkness, which was personified by this creature's father," Neferet said smoothly. "I am not allied with him anymore. Let's ask the creature if he can say the same." She looked at the Raven Mocker. "Rephaim, will you swear that you are no longer your father's son? That you no longer are allied with him?" This time Rephaim did answer Neferet directly.

"Only my father can free me from his service." I could see the smugness in Neferet's face. "And have you asked Kalona to free you from him?"

"I have not." Rephaim looked from Neferet to Stevie Rae. "Please understand."

"I do. I promise you I do," she told him. Then she shouted at Neferet. "He hasn't asked Kalona to free him because he doesn't want to betray his daddy!"

"His reasons for choosing Darkness are not important," Neferet said.

"Actually, I think they are," I said. "And another thing, we're talking about Kalona like he's here. Isn't he supposed to have been banished from your side?"

Neferet turned her cold green eyes on me. "The immortal is no longer at my side."

"But it's sounding like he's here in Tulsa. If he's banished, what is he doing here? Uh, Rephaim," I tripped over his name. It was super weird to be talking to the scary creature like he was an ordinary guy. "Is your dad in Tulsa?"

"I-I cannot speak of my father," the Raven Mocker said haltingly.

"I'm not asking you to say anything bad or even tell us where exactly he is," I said. I was surprised to be able to see the anguish in his red-tinged eyes.

"I am sorry. I cannot." "See! He will not speak against Kalona; he will not stand against Kalona," Neferet's voice shot out. "And because the Raven Mocker is here, we know that Kalona is either in Tulsa already, or on his way. So when he attacks this school, as he surely will, you will, again, be by his side fighting against us."

Rephaim turned his scarlet gaze to Stevie Rae. In a voice filled with despair he said, "I will not harm you, but he is my father and I--"

Neferet cut in, "Dragon Lankford, as High Priestess of this House of Night I command you to protect it. Kill this vile Raven Mocker and anyone who would stand with him."

I saw Neferet raise her hand and flick her wrist toward Stevie Rae. The green glowy bubble that had been surrounding her and the Raven Mocker shivered, and Stevie Rae groaned. Her face went real white, and she put her hand to her stomach like she was going to be sick.

"Stevie Rae?" I started to go to her, but Stark grabbed my hand, holding me back.

"Neferet's using Darkness," he said. "You can't get between her and Stevie Rae--it'll cut you down."

"Darkness?" Neferet's voice sounded swollen with power. "I'm not using Darkness. I'm using the righteous vengeance of a goddess. Only that could let me break this barrier. Now, Dragon! Show this creature the consequence for standing against my House of Night!"

Stevie Rae groaned again, and dropped to her knees. The green glow vanished. Rephaim was bending over Stevie Rae, so his back was completely exposed and vulnerable to Dragon's sword. I raised the hand Stark wasn't clutching, but what was I going to do? Attack Dragon? To save the Raven Mocker who had killed his mate?

I was frozen. I wouldn't let Dragon hurt Stevie Rae, but he wasn't attacking her--he was attacking our enemy, an enemy my BFF had Imprinted with. It was like watching one of those slasher movies and waiting for the throat- cutting, dismembering, totally gross carnage to start, only this was for real. There was a great whooshing sound, like a controlled gale, and Kalona dropped from the sky, landing between his son and Dragon. He had that terrible black spear in his hand, the one he'd materialized in the Otherworld, and with it he deflected the Sword Master's blow with such force that he knocked Dragon to his knees.

The Sons of Erebus leaped into action. More than a dozen of them rushed to defend their Sword Master. Kalona was a deadly blur, but even he was struggling to handle so many Warriors at once.

"Rephaim! Son!" Kalona called to him. "To me! Defend me!"