Shame Me Not

By the time I’d dragged my kisses up her neck, she was panting. I had to swallow a lump when I reached the redness around her neck. Had to stop and get the harsh tightness in my lungs under control as I stared at the trail of blood that had trickled and dried.

“Kevin,” she whispered desperately. “I’m fine. But I won’t be if you don’t stop torturing me.”

I leaned down, trailing my tongue over the dried blood wondering if it freaked her out, but all I felt was the puffs of her heavy breathing along my forehead. Biting her bottom lip, I stared in her eyes and lined myself up with her opening. I dragged the head through her wetness, teasing both of us with what was to come.

“Please,” she begged against my lips.

Taking in the comfort pouring from her blue eyes, I eased in, an agonizing inch at a time, savoring the way her wet heat enveloped me, welcomed me inside her. Easing in and out of her, I set a slow pace, watching her face always for any pain. I was scared and it was impossible to hide. Ana grew impatient at my pace and dug her nails into my shoulders, using the heels of her feet to urge me on. “Kevin,” she growled in my neck. “You won’t hurt me.” I wanted to believe her. I truly did, but every time I closed my eyes, I saw her frantic eyes and I hesitated. “Please, Kev. You know I need it.”

We both did. As amazing as it felt to be inside her, for us, it wasn’t enough. We needed that extra bite, that extra dose of unusual to get there. Compromising, I kept my pace slow, but I moved harder. I thrust in roughly only to drag out to the very tip and repeat the process, watching her breasts bounce and hearing her whimper on each entry. I used my thumbs and dug them into the soft tissue at the hollows of her hips and watched her writhe in pleasure from the pain.

My heart felt like it was going to beat out of my chest, like it would explode. This sex was different than any other sex we’d shared. The other times were harsh and full of a fast-paced energy that screamed at us to fuck. This, my body sliding in and out of hers as her cries rang out into the room, was different. This, I realized, was the closest I’d come to making love, and I couldn’t have imagined such an intimate moment with anyone other than Ana.

This was us conquering the fear and accepting each other despite the mistake, despite the wrong. This was us basking in our uniqueness and giving it back to each other.

I shifted my hand and rubbed my callused thumb around her clit before flicking it back and forth. “Play with your nipples, Ana. Show me how you like it.”

Her eyes remained glued to mine as her fingers pinched and tugged. I picked up my pace, pushing a little bit harder and shifted her hips up so I penetrated her deeper. I knew I was hurting her, but I knew she liked it.

Her lips parted on a wordless cry and her head pushed back into the pillow as her pussy gripped me in a vice, pulling my own orgasm from me. Letting it take over, I fell to her chest and groaned out my pleasure as I continued to push into her deeper and deeper, trying to reach a new place inside her.

My body was limp and she held me to her chest, her fingers running through my hair, soothing me, bringing me back from the edge. Once the ringing stopped, her words finally registered between cool kisses to my sweaty forehead.

“Thank you.” Kiss. “Thank you so much.” Kiss. “It’s everything I always wanted, and I want it with you.” Kiss. “Don’t let anything change us.” Kiss. “Please.”

Slipping out of her, I pressed a kiss to her chest and then wordlessly got up to dispose of the condom before crawling back in bed to hold her close to me. It wasn’t long before our heavy breathing lulled us to sleep.

The beeping of my alarm woke us. I’d set it so we had plenty of warning before my parents returned home. I shut it off and rolled over to cradle Ana in my arms again.

“I don’t want to leave your arms,” she grumbled into my neck before placing kisses up to my ear.

“I don’t want you to leave either.”

She lifted herself up and hovered over me with a smirk. “One more time before we have to get dressed.” She was insatiable and I loved it.

“Fuck, Ana. You’re going to kill me.”

“Maybe, but what a way to go.”

Chapter Twenty-Four

Ana

Kev was still guarded a month later. We’d been nervous with every new thing we’d tried when we’d first started and then the incident with the belt set us back to the beginning. As we would begin a scene, he’d stuttered over his words when he would give me a command. His hands trembled when he reached out to touch me. I hated it and pushed him to move forward and let the memory of it go.