Fortuity (Transcend 3)

Tears fill her eyes.

“I love you more than I loved Jenna. Not because I didn’t love them with my whole heart. I did. It’s just that my time away with Morgan has taught me one thing. Our capacity to love grows with time. It grows with every new person who touches our lives. So I love you more because my heart is bigger.”

She blinks, setting the tears free.

*

Truth?

I don’t know how this chapter of our story will end. A doctor’s first rule is to do no harm. As Morgan and I drive Gracelyn back to the airport in Chicago, I think of the fun we’ve had. I took a million pictures of them in the tree house. The three of us, hand-in-hand, taking Joby for walks. Eating at Morgan’s favorite restaurants. Game night where Morgan bankrupted Gracelyn and me in Monopoly.

Gracelyn teaching Morgan how to make perfect mashed potatoes and the chewiest chocolate chip cookies.

Morgan practicing her braiding technique on Gracelyn.

Gracelyn painting Morgan’s fingernails and toenails in a bright shade of pink.

The girly giggles.

The endearing smiles.

Just everything.

But … Gracelyn is headed back to San Diego to her job and to wait for her next period and Gabe, when he returns in a week. We agreed that she would ask him how he feels about moving, and I would call him if she needed reinforcement. We agreed we would do no harm to him and his still fragile state, knowing that it will be years before he stops feeling the emptiness of his loss.

I unload her luggage as she and Morgan get out at the terminal drop-off.

“Hug Gabe and Mr. Hans for me.” Morgan hugs her.

“I will. Take care of you and maybe keep an eye on your dad too. I’m going to miss you like crazy.”

Morgan keeps her arms around Gracelyn’s waist while looking up at her. “We’ll see each other soon. Right?”

Gracelyn kisses Morgan’s head. “I hope so. There’s always video chat and TikTok dancing.”

My daughter nods. “Okay. Bye. I’ll get in the car in case my dad wants to kiss you goodbye.”

We grin as she hops into the backseat.

I see the pain and dread on her face, in spite of the brave smile she’s giving me. “What if I’m not …”

I shake my head and cradle her face in my hands. “It changes nothing.”

She nods. “No more letters. I want … I need your voice and this face.” Her hands press to my cheeks, mimicking mine on hers.

Her thumb rubs along my lips, making me grin even more.

“Lots of phone calls. Video chat. And dirty texts.”

A bigger smile chases away her wavering fear. “Definitely.”

“I’m a plane ride away. I’ll grab a flight and be there if you need me.”

“I know.”

We stare at each other, neither one wanting to let go of the other.

“I have a flight to catch. If you’re going to steal a kiss … now’s the time.”

I grab her wrist and move her hand over my mouth, kissing it … kissing down to where she used to be shackled to her past. Then I kiss her lips, knowing young eyes are too snoopy to not be on us. I don’t care.

I promised Morgan honesty. This is it. This is what it looks like to love someone deeply … madly … to the depths of your soul. So much it rips your fucking heart out of your chest to let go. My daughter should never settle for less if I deem some guy worthy of her … twenty years from now.

Gracelyn pulls away, breathless, keeping her eyes closed. “Bye, my love.” She turns, grabs her suitcase, and takes off to the terminal entrance.

I slide my hands in my front pockets and wait.

Give it to me …

At the last second, she glances over her shoulder.

“There it is,” I whisper to myself.

CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR

Gracelyn

I go home.

I don’t know who I’m missing more—Nate and Morgan or Gabe.

Probably Gabe. I’ve been away from him longer.

We don’t video chat because they’re always where the connection is terrible. So other than a few texts, I get a phone call with him and my parents each night. I haven’t told them I went to Nate’s house, and since Gabe hasn’t mentioned it, I know Morgan’s managed to keep it a secret too.

Mr. Hans spends a lot of time eyeing me with an odd look and asking about Chicago. I dodge questions with vague answers and swift subject changes. I fear he’s onto me.

Nate and Morgan video chat with me every day. Then after Morgan goes to bed, Nate calls me. I snuggle under my covers and fall asleep to his soothing voice every night. The next morning, he texts me and asks what’s the last thing I remember him saying. I never remember what he said. I just remember how his voice in my ear made me feel.