Samuel slowly sank back down onto his chair. From hundreds of miles away and not knowing it, Remo had landed another hit.
“It’s still early. We can call the doc and he will get rid of it,” Dad said, face pale and worried when he finally met my gaze.
My stomach tightened and something angry and protective reared its head in my chest. My child.
Mom nodded slowly. “You don’t have to keep it.”
Samuel only looked at me. He knew me. Until recently better than anyone else, but Remo had seen parts of me nobody knew, my darkest parts. “You want to keep it,” he said quietly, uncomprehending.
I touched my stomach. “I will keep this child. I will take care of it and love it and protect it. It’s mine.” And the moment the words left my mouth, I knew it with certainty. This child would be born, and whoever tried to take it from me would see how strong I was.
Silence greeted me. Then Dante nodded once. “It’s your decision.”
“It is,” I said firmly.
Mom got up. It was obvious that she was fighting with herself. I walked up to her because she couldn’t move and touched her shoulders. “We will get through this, right? This baby is innocent. It’s my baby.”
Mom smiled shakily. “You are right, sweetheart.”
Dad got up and touched my cheek. “We will stand by your side.” I could see how much these words cost him. I wasn’t sure if my family could get past the fact that my child was Remo’s child. Would they love it because it was mine or hate it because it was his?
CHAPTER 23
SERAFINA
I sat in front of my vanity and brushed my hair, stroke after stroke, trying to find calm. I could hear the first guests downstairs, could hear laughter and music.
I needed to go down. Taking a deep breath, I stood. I’d chosen a floor-length form-fitting dark blue dress matching the color of Samuel’s shirt. I touched my stomach, still flat, but I knew in a few months I couldn’t wear dresses like this anymore.
Remo’s baby. I closed my eyes. I was happy and sad, terrified and hopeful. What would Remo say if he knew? Would he care at all? I had been a means to an end, a queen in his chess game, and he’d won.
He had let me go as if I was nothing.
I’d heard the rumors of his cage fights. He was back to fighting, back to living his life. I wondered if he’d already moved on to one of the many whores at his disposal? Probably.
I had been stupid.
Sam was right. Remo had twisted my mind so he could control me, and I had let him.
A familiar knock sounded and Samuel stepped in. We hadn’t talked since I’d revealed my pregnancy to my family. It had become obvious that they needed time to let it sink in, time to put on their public masks so our guests wouldn’t find out the truth. Not yet.
He stopped near the door, watching me like I was breaking apart right before his eyes. I turned around myself, showing him my dress. “We match.” I wanted to see his smile, anything but the soul-crushing darkness.
“You are beautiful,” he said, but he didn’t smile. I walked toward him, and as I did his eyes were drawn to my stomach. “Fina, get rid of it.”
I froze. Sam stepped up to me and gripped my arms. “Please, get rid of it. I can’t bear the idea that something belonging to him is growing inside of you.”
“Sam,” I whispered. “This is a baby. It’s innocent. Whatever Remo did, this baby won’t suffer for it.”
Samuel ripped away from me. “But you will! What do you think people will say if you give birth to his spawn? And the thing will remind you of the asshole every fucking day. How will you ever forget if you see the result of Remo’s fucking sins every day?”
I turned away and moved toward the window, clutching the windowsill in an iron grip, trying to hold on to my composure. If I wanted to show up at Dad’s party, I couldn’t lose it now.
Samuel came up behind me and touched my shoulders. “I shouldn’t have said that.”
“It’s okay,” I said. I put my hand over Samuel’s. “I need you at my side, Sam. The baby and I … we both need you. Please.”
Samuel put his chin down on my head and sighed. “I’ll always be there for you.”
We stood like that for a while until I turned and gave Samuel a firm smile. “Let’s go down there and show people that we are strong together.”
Samuel held out his hand, and I took it. We moved downstairs together, and Samuel’s grip on me tightened when the attention shifted to me. People were trying to be discreet about it but failing miserably. Every Underboss was there, even Danilo. He stood off to the side, next to the bar, nursing an amber colored drink. Our eyes met briefly, but then I looked away.