Snow is my brother by choice.
“Come on, man…” He runs his hand through his hair again. “Like it?”
“Looks fine, Snow.” He nods and smiles, happy to have gotten confirmation. “You growing your beard too? I like it.”
Running my hand over my jaw, I shake my head.
Why the fuck has he gotten me thinking about how my fucking beard looks? I don’t give two fucks! Walking over to my bike, the prospect straightens up with his rag in hand. The kid’s done a good job, cleaned and polished my baby real well.
Impressed? Yeah, I am totally impressed, but I don’t tell him that. He doesn’t need to know.
“Pres.” A voice comes from the side. Marley, our Enforcer. “The parents want to see you.”
Fuck!
Fuck!
“Get rid of them,” I throw over my shoulder.
Marley takes a step back, and just when I think he’s going, he stops. “They’ve been coming for months. They will keep coming. Just thought you should know.” He turns and walks off.
“Marley.”
He stops before he gets to the door. Glancing at the prospect who’s still looking down, I walk past him and to Marley. This is not something I want to deal with. I didn’t choose this shit. Tanika had demons of her own, and I wasn’t enough to help her. She killed herself, and I couldn’t save her. No matter what I did.
But fuck it! He’s right, they will keep coming if I don’t see them.
Walking past him and out the front door to the gates where their car has stopped—because they can’t get in any farther unless I allow it—I take a deep breath. I step out to see them. They’re leaning against their car, holding hands, their heads bowed together as they stand there and wait.
I didn’t know Tanika as well as many did, but I felt for her. And I liked her. I don’t like many people. Maybe it was because she was so broken that she dragged me in. I don’t know. But in the end, her demons got the best of her, and she jumped off the bridge, with her best friend, Rochelle, watching her helplessly.
They straighten up when they see me, hands still clasped together as I reach them.
The mother looks so much like Tanika—black hair, her face shaped like a heart with lashes fanning her sad eyes. They could almost be sisters.
“We didn’t think you would come.” She pulls at her dress, and I bite my lip. It’s the same thing Tanika did when I first met her. After that, she threw herself at me, and the memory makes me smile.
“I didn’t intend to.”
“You knew her well those last few months. She was a shell to us. Never home…” the father speaks.
Tanika’s mother wipes at her sad eyes.
“We just wanted to meet you. Rochelle said you helped her. We wanted to thank you in person for doing things we couldn’t do.”
Sliding my hands into my pockets, I nod my head at them. They look past me to the gates that keep them out, then back to me. “You aren’t what we were expecting,” the mother says.
“I never am,” I say, shrugging my shoulders.
“I know your answer will probably be no, but I wanted to ask if you’d like anything of hers? We’ve been going through all her things, and we found this.” She reaches into her pocket and pulls out a small pendant with a heart on the end. Reaching for it, I unlock it, and inside is a picture of her with me kissing her cheek. You can’t see my face as it’s buried in her dark hair, but it’s me.
“They found it on her body that night.” Her mother hiccups as she tries to stop herself from crying.
The loud sound of bikes is heard as a few of my boys drive past us, getting back from their road trip and ready to go out for the night.
“You keep it.” I go to hand it back to her.
She shakes her head. “No, please. You keep it. And thank you. Thank you for meeting with us. And thank you for trying to help.”
I don’t want to tell them that I didn’t do as much as they think I did. Tanika would come here to the clubhouse to get fucked-up. And no matter how hard I did try to stop her, it was her only outlet for something I didn’t fully understand. And as a man, I may never be able to.
Her father reaches out his hand, and I look at it confused. He lowers it as I reach up and shake. “If you ever need anything, come to us. Please.”
I nod, having nothing else to say to him.
No one has ever offered me help without expecting something in return. So I know I won’t take it.
I watch as they leave, knowing full well that will be the last time I see them, and in some way, I hope it helps them heal.