He had loved her, because she was the girl Jon loved, because she was his little brother’s wife, but after speaking with her and feeling their connection grow, he loved Poppy Ellis, the individual she was. How could he not when she had been so important to the one person he cared about the most?
Blake remembered the very first time Jon told him he loved Poppy Mathews at seven years old and that he would marry her. That had been the start of a great romance, one that poems should have been written about. It was the love Jon had for Poppy that made Blake believe in soulmates and love at first sight.
“I didn’t tell you everything, Blake.” Her softly spoken voice drew him out of his thoughts.
“What do you mean?” He still held her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. Their relationship was one of open honesty. He would never hold anything back from her, and she knew he was always here to listen. Jon’s death had brought them together in a way that survivors clung to one another. At least that was how Blake felt.
Poppy turned her whole body toward him. The tension that surrounded her was thick, but he didn’t rush her. Obviously, a serious subject matter had just arose, and she deserved his understanding and undivided attention.
“That night, before the accident, Jon and I were fighting.” She closed her eyes, and her face took on a look of pain. “It was so damn stupid. He went to lunch with a female coworker, and I blew it way out of proportion.”
“Poppy—” She shook her head, and he stopped what he was about to say.
“Our last conversation… I’d been pissed at him, all but accusing him of cheating.” The blue of her eyes seemed more intense with her unshed tears.
Blake felt his throat close with emotion.
“Poppy, you know Jon would never have cheated on you.”
She nodded and wiped her tears away. “Of course I know that. It was my own insecurities and jealousy that made me so angry.” When she lifted her eyes to his, the firelight played off the tears slowly sliding down her cheeks.
“Hey, now.” He brushed them away with his thumb and cupped her cheek. Her skin grew warm from the fire. “This is not your fault.” She started shaking her head, and he cupped the other side of her face with his hand. “Poppy. This is not your fault. Do you understand me? The accident, the fighting, was not a result of you doing anything wrong.”
“I know, it’s just—” She took a deep breath. “—I wonder if I hadn’t kept the fight going, then maybe Jon wouldn’t have been so worried about me and the accident may never have happened.”
“Sweetheart.” Blake ran his thumbs under her eyes. “Things happen, no matter what we do. We can’t control the weather, and we certainly can’t control other people’s actions.” The car that had slammed into them had lost control and hit a patch of black ice. When it hit Jon’s car, it caused it to careen out of control and slam so hard against a telephone pole the car had nearly wrapped around it. Poppy had been lucky she lived that day, but because the driver side had been the one to take the impact, his little brother hadn’t been so fortunate. Blake was just glad Jon’s death had been instant. If Jon had suffered, it would have made the grieving process even more arduous.
“I knew as soon as I woke up in the hospital that I lost everything, that I lost Jon. I felt that emptiness right away.” Hard, wracking sobs left her, and Blake pulled her into his lap. Her whole body shook from the force, and he wished he could take the pain away from her.
“I’m a coward, Blake.”
“Shhh, Poppy.” He cupped the back of her head and whispered things he wished someone would have said to him when he was hurting. “I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere.”
“There is just so much anger inside me.” Her voice was muffled, and when she lifted her red-rimmed eyes, something inside him clenched with torture. Seeing her upset was so much harder than hearing her tears over the phone. “I feel like I’m drowning in it, Blake. When will it go away so I don’t feel like this?”
He searched her face but didn’t know how to answer. “I don’t know, Poppy. I don’t know.” He pulled her into his chest again and rocked her until her sobs stopped and the even sound of her breathing told him she had fallen asleep.Chapter 8Monday morning came and went, and now Blake sat behind his desk Monday evening with a massive headache. He hadn’t gotten much sleep last night, partly due to the storm, but mainly because he couldn’t stop thinking about everything Poppy told him.