A Billionaire for Christmas

Still, Emma is silent.

“Emma?” I ask.

She brightens. Then she turns to Miles. “Oh, my God. You’re a genius, Miles.”

“I do my best, ma’am.”

Then Emma turns to me. “This really is a great idea! We’re eloping to Vegas. Tonight.”

“What?”

“You heard me. Fuck it. My mother wants to hire a wedding planner behind my back? Fine. She can have that wedding on May twenty-fifth. Our real wedding is happening tomorrow. December twenty-fourth.”

“But…” I look at Miles. “Don’t you need like… a venue?”

“Not in Vegas, sir. You just go pull up to the drive-through.”

“Oh.” Emma laughs. “Oh, that’s perfect. I am going to need all the pictures of that. I will teach my mother not to meddle in my life again.”

“Emma,” I say. “You’re not serious, right? You want the big day. You just said so. A drive-through wedding isn’t a big day, babe. It’s… it’s an afterthought.”

“No. Not if we’re the ones who plan it. Look, we could take back the announcement. We could humiliate my mother publicly. Make her look like a fool. And that will certainly teach her a lesson. But the sneakier way to do this is so much better. We get married, she doesn’t get to be there—no one gets to be there. Karen Krakken never gets her day on the society page next to Baby Boston and the Bright Berry Beach billionairess, and you know what the best part is?”

I raise my eyebrows at her. “I’m afraid to ask.”

“We could be back here in time for Christmas Eve dinner and they would never know.” She turns to Miles. “Don’t worry. You and Christopher can stay in Vegas as planned. We’ll take a charter back.”

“Very well, ma’am. Good plan.”

“Good plan? Miles! Dude. This is insanity! Emma is trying to out-boss her bossy mother.”

“And then”—Emma is still on a roll—“then… I’m gonna call up the local paper and make them announce our drive-through Vegas wedding. Ha! Merry Christmas, Mom!”

“Emma… let’s just take a minute—”

But she’s pointing to Miles. “When can we leave?”

“Within the hour, ma’am.”

“Perfect. We’ll pack and meet you at the airport. Let’s do this.” And then she turns to me, wraps her arms around my neck, rises up on her tiptoes, kisses me on the mouth, and says, “This will be the most perfect one-up wedding ever!”

I kiss her back, giving in. “I have no doubt, my bossy bride. No doubt at all.”Chapter EightObviously, we have to travel light since this is a stealth mission, but it’s no big deal. We don’t even need to book a hotel because we’re not going to stay over in Vegas. Just land, get hitched in the most outrageous way possible—maybe not an actual drive-through, but for sure something equally ridiculous—and then meet our charter plane back at the airport by eleven AM so we can make it back to Key West for Christmas Eve dinner by eight PM and no one will even know we left.

Take that, Mom. You bossy-buttinski. You think you can out-boss me? Please. I’m the bossiest bosser ever. Even Jesse has to admit that I can out-boss him any day of the week. My mother has nothing on me. Nothing.

Jesse walks out of the bedroom dragging one wheelie carry-on.

“What did you pack?”

“Toothbrushes, makeup, two t-shirts, two pairs of shorts, and my shaving kit.”

I stare at him, letting the reality of things sink in fully for a moment. “We’re sure?”

“Hey, babe, you’re in charge of the wedding. I follow you in all matrimony matters.”

“Good answer.” I snicker. “OK. So. First, we need to get to the airport.” Both of us look out the front window, where the street party is still in full swing. “We can’t go that way, obviously.” I get out my phone, pull up my Uber app, and then ask for a car. “We’ll sneak around back and meet our Uber there. Oh, look! One is just two minutes away! It’s like fate!” I press the button to call the car. “Let’s go.”

We go out through the back yard and leave through the side gate. But it becomes clear that the only way to get over to the street behind us is through Kraken Karen’s side yard.

“Shit.” I look over my shoulder at the street party. “Do you think the Kraken is still out there? Because we have to sneak past her house.”

Jesse looks lazily at the party, then back at me, and shrugs. “Your plan, Ems. I follow you.”

I huff. “It would not kill you to be a little bossy, ya know?”

“I don’t know where Karen is. But”—he looks past me towards her house—“it’s pretty dark in there. I bet they’re all at the party. Come on, I’ll lead the way since you’re terrified of her.” He takes my hand and starts pulling me along the fence towards the Krakken back yard.

“I’m not terrified of her,” I whisper back as we creep. “I can take Kraken Karen any day of the week.”