“Bullshit,” she yelled and I stiffened at the fury in her voice. “You’re an asshole. You won’t even try. Why? Why did you come back and blow my world apart and give me hope only to tear it apart again. You’re a selfish bastard, Connor. Go. Leave. Run. You’re getting good at that.”
“Alina…”
She shoved at Vic’s hand gripping her arm. “Damn it, let me go. I’m going to be sick.” He instantly let her go. She shoved past him and ran down the hallway and into the washroom.
I didn’t think, I reacted and started after her. “Alina! Fuck.” Deck stepped in my path and I was about to reach for my gun when a knife flew past my head and embedded in the door behind me.
I jerked my eyes to Kai who watched me, his brows lifted as if daring me to make another move.
My head throbbed and I knew I was going to lose it any minute. Fuck, I had to get out of here. “Keep her safe,” I said to Deck.
He sighed. “Jesus, Connor. Let me in. Don’t force my hand.”
What the fuck did he mean by that? “What? Are you going to take me down? Chain me up again? Have some doctor pump me full of sedatives.”
“No. All I’m asking is for you to have blood taken. We start there.”
I moved my hand to my hip, close to my gun as I backed toward the door, because from his comment I wasn’t sure Deck wouldn’t try to stop me. “Don’t hassle Alina again.”
“And what are you going to do about it anyway?” he said. I jerked, mouth pursed. “You’ll be gone. Off someplace pretending you’re dead.”
“I am dead,” I shouted as the control broke and the rage pumped through my veins. “I’m fuckin’ dead, damn it. There’s nothing left of me except raw, jagged pieces of a man I hate.”
“Bullshit!” Deck shouted back at me. “That’s complete bullshit. You’re here because you’re alive and give a shit about Alina. You watch her because you care. And you hate who you are because you refuse to let in who you were.”
I went for him.
My fist connected with his jaw and the sound of my knuckles hitting his bone echoed. He staggered back two steps from the impact but didn’t go down. I had my gun out fired off a shot at the floor near Vic who came toward me. “Back off, Gate.”
Deck held up his hand and Vic stopped and Kai lowered the knife.
Then I heard her. Alina. She stood with one hand settled on the wall her weight leaning into it as if it were what kept her standing. But it was the look in her eyes that made leaving so much easier.
Fear. Devastation. Hurt.
Jesus. She didn’t deserve this.
I backed to the door then flung it open, my gun pointed at Deck.
“It’s over,” I said, more to myself than them.
Because holding a gun on Deck, on Vic, seeing Alina’s pain, it was over. And until that moment, I never realized there’d been hope. But not now.
I’d gone too far and there was no drug to blame. No, this was just me threatening to kill my best friend while the girl I loved watched.Question 10: What would you give up for your best friend?I SAT ON the porch with a half-full mug of steaming coffee in hand, the loveseat swing creaking back and forth as it swayed. After Connor confronted Deck at the bar, I hadn’t seen him in five days, and my stomach had been unsettled ever since. I had a constant fluttering. I’d thrown up three times and I was unable to sleep.
His words continued to haunt me. ‘It’s over’.
Losing him again was too much and I hated that I cared. I should’ve known it would come to this. But giving up on him was never an option for me even though I’d been angry and said those things at the bar. I know if our places were switched, he’d never give up on me.
Just like Deck wouldn’t give up on Connor.
He was confident that Connor would be back, so Vic became my shadow and lived at the house with me. When I went to work, either Deck or Vic remained at Avalanche, making certain Connor didn’t try something. I wasn’t sure what they expected him to do and when I asked Deck the previous day, he told me he thought Connor might try to take me with him.
He also told me Connor needed to be pushed. I didn’t like the sound of that, but Deck promised that they wouldn’t force him. Connor had to get to a point where he was willing to at least take a step toward getting some kind of help.
Deck thought I was the key. From Connor’s obsessive need to watch me and keep me safe, he was confident Connor wouldn’t leave town. Or if he did, he’d be back.