The Artemis Fowl Files (Artemis Fowl 0.50)

DWARFS

Distinguishing features:

Short, round, and hairy

Large tombstone teeth—good for grinding...well, anything really

Unhingable jaws enabling them to excavate tunnels

Sensitive beard hair

Skin capable of acting likesuction cups when dehydrated

Smelly

Character:

Sensitive

Intelligent

Criminal tendencies

Loves:

Gold and precious gems

Tunneling

The dark

Situations to avoid:

Being in a confined space with them when they have been tunneling and have a buildup of trapped air. If they reach for the bum flap on their trousers, get out of there....

TROLLS

Distinguishing features:

Huge—as big as an elephant

Light-sensitive eyes

Hate noise

Hairy, with dreadlocks

Retractable claws

Teeth!—lots and lots of teeth

Tusks like a wild boar (a really wild boar)

Green tongue

Exceptionally strong

Weak point at the base of the skull

Character:

Very, very stupid—trolls have tiny brains

Mean and bad-tempered

Loves:

Eating—anything. A couple of cows would make alight snack

Situations to avoid:

Are you joking? If you even think a troll is near, run like the wind.

GOBLINS

Distinguishing features:

Scaly

Lidless eyes—they lick their eyeballs to keep them moist

Able to throw fireballs

They go on all fours when speed is important

Forked tongue

Less than three feet tall

Slimy, fireproof skin

Character:

Not clever, but cunning

Argumentative

Ambitious

Power-hungry

Loves:

Fire

A good argument

Power

Situations to avoid:

Don’t get in the wayif they’re throwing a fireball.

CENTAURS

Distinguishing features:

Half man, half pony

Hairy—obviously!

Hooves can get very dry

Character:

Extremely intelligent

Vain

Paranoid

Kind

Computer geek

Loves:

Showing off

Inventing

Situations to avoid:

They aren’t verydangerous physically, but they will sulk if you criticizetheir latest invention, mess with their hard drive, or borrowtheir hoof moisturizer.

SPRITES

Distinguishing features:

About three feet tall

Pointy ears

Green skin

Wings

Character:

Average intelligence

Generally happy-go-lucky attitude

Loves:

Flying—more than anything else under or above the earth

Situations to avoid:

Watch out for low-flying sprites—they don’t always look where they’re going.

PIXIES

Distinguishing features:

About three feet tall

Pointy ears

Apart from their ears and their height, pixies look almost human

Character:

Extremely intelligent

No morals

Cunning

Ambitious

Greedy

Loves:

Power and money

Chocolate