The Crush

I watched them talking out the window. Nathan looked tense as he listened to whatever Niles had to say. Tempted to go out there, I refrained.

After a few minutes, they came back inside. I’d known Nathan long enough to see that something Niles had said out there definitely irked him. As soon as I got the chance, I’d have to ask him what happened.

Niles sat down next to Dad, and they started shooting the shit about the game.

I could see Farrah in the dining room setting up the dessert plates. I’d been so preoccupied that I’d neglected to see if she needed anything. No other lazy asses in this house had offered to help.

“What can I do?” I asked, popping my head in.

She didn’t look up at me. “Nothing. Go sit. I’m just warming the pies. I’ll call everyone when dessert is ready.”

Farrah looked around, as if she’d forgotten where she’d put something. She seemed rushed and tense. I wanted to hug her, take all of her stress away. Rather than leave the doorway, I continued to watch her. I don’t think I realized I hadn’t moved until she said, “What?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re looking at me like you want to say something.”

I shook my head. “I’m sorry. No. I’m just…” I said nothing else.

All of the unspoken words continued to bubble in my chest. But if I couldn’t say them earlier in the truck, now was certainly not the right time with Niles in the next room.

Once everyone gathered around the table, it was clear that someone was going to have to stand, since there weren’t enough chairs. Niles was the fifth wheel who’d disrupted our peaceful family gathering of four, but I quietly volunteered by taking my pie to the corner of the room and leaning against the wall. I watched Niles like a hawk as he turned to speak to my father.

“So, Phil, what is it that your company does?”

“I own Muldoon Construction.”

“No shit? You guys handled the renovation of the old strip mall into apartments, right?”

My father nodded proudly. “Yes, indeed we did.”

“My cousin lives there. He’s always complaining about the cheap particleboard in the kitchen.”

Farrah’s eyes narrowed. “Niles…”

What the fuck?

It was a miracle I hadn’t punched him yet.

Dad’s response couldn’t have made me any happier. “Well, you tell your cousin that unless he wants to pay more rent to live in the best section of town, he’d better kiss the ass of that particleboard.”

Niles stuffed his face with apple pie, and thankfully, he shut up after that.

What the hell does she see in this guy?

“Hey, Jace. You mind if I show you that thing with my car I was telling you about?” Nathan suddenly asked.

I squinted before realizing he was bullshitting just to get me alone. Placing my plate on the corner of the table, I said, “Yeah.” I patted my dad on the shoulder. “Be right back.”

“Is it so urgent that you have to leave the table in the middle of dessert, Nathan?” Farrah asked.

“Yeah. I don’t want to forget. Sorry. It’s been bugging me. It won’t take long.”

Once outside, I made sure we stood away from the window so Niles couldn’t see us.

I kept my voice down. “What’s up, man?”

“We have to do something about him.”

“About Niles?”

“Yes.”

“What happened?”

“He’s trying to convince me to go up to North Carolina for Christmas with them because he doesn’t think Farrah will leave me alone here.”

“So just tell him no.”

“The reason he wants to make sure she goes is because he’s planning to propose to her there.”

I suddenly became conscious of the Earth spinning. Running my hand through my hair, I muttered, “Fuck.”

“Jace, be honest with me, okay?”

Swallowing hard, I nodded. “Alright.”

“Are you still in love with my sister? I see the way you look at each other…”

That was a question I hadn’t addressed aloud until now. But I knew the answer. “I never stopped loving her. I only ever tried to forget about it.”

“I just want her to be happy.” His voice cracked. “If I felt he made her happy, I wouldn’t try to fight this. But it just seems like she’s…I don’t know…comatose with him. Just going through the motions. I don’t believe for a second that he truly makes her happy. He gives her a sense of security, maybe. But there’s a difference.”

“I don’t know if Farrah could ever trust me again after what I did, Nathan. You don’t just forget about someone leaving you like that.”

“I know the hand I played in that. I can’t let my sister marry someone she doesn’t love because she’s too damn scared to get her heart broken again.”

The door suddenly opened.

Farrah put her hands on her hips, looking pissed at both of us. As much as I didn’t want her to be mad, the spark in her eyes was better than the emptiness I’d seen before. I’d gladly take any emotion from her right now—even annoyance.