Nothing moved.
Then someone sneezed, and some soot fell into the empty grate, followed by Nanny Ogg and, eventually, by the small, black, and irate figure of Casanunda.
“Yuk,” said Nanny, looking around at the debris. “This really is the pips.”
“You should have let me fight them!”
“There were too many of them, my lad.”
Casanunda threw his sword on the floor in disgust.
“We were just getting to know one another properly and fifty elves burst into the place! Damn! This kind of thing happens to me all the time!”
“That's the best thing about black, it doesn't show the soot,” said Nanny Ogg vaguely, dusting herself off. “They managed it, then. Esme was right. Wonder where she is? Oh, well. Come on.”
“Where're we going?” said the dwarf.
“Down to my cottage.”
“Ah!”
“To get my broomstick,” said Nanny Ogg firmly. “I ain't having the Queen of the Fairies ruling my children. So we'd better get some help. This has gone too far.”
“We could go up into the mountains,” said Casanunda, as they crept down the stairs. “There's thousands of dwarfs up there.”
“No,” said Nanny Ogg. “Esme won't thank me for this, but I'm the one who has to wave the bag o' sweets when she overreaches herself . . . and I'm thinking about someone who really hates the Queen.”
“You won't find anyone who hates her worse than dwarfs do,” said Casanunda.
“Oh, you will,” said Nanny Ogg, “if you knows where to look.”
The elves had been into Nanny Ogg's cottage, too. There weren't two pieces of furniture left whole.
“What they don't take they smash,” said Nanny Ogg.
She stirred the debris with her foot. Glass tinkled.
“That vase was a present from Esme,” she said, to the unfeeling world in general. “Never liked it much.”
“Why'd they do it?” said Casanunda, looking around.
“Oh, they'd smash the world if they thought it'd make a pretty noise,” said Nanny She stepped outside again and felt around under the eaves of the low thatched roof, and pulled out her broomstick with a small grunt of triumph.
“I always shove it up there,” she said, “otherwise the kids nick it and go joy-riding. You ride behind me, and I say this against my better judgement.”
Casanunda shuddered. Dwarfs are generally scared of heights, since they don't often have the opportunity to get used to them.
Nanny scratched her chin, making a sandpapery sound.
“And we'll need a crowbar,” she said. “There'll be one in Jason's forge. Hop on, my lad.”
“I really wasn't expecting this,” said Casanunda, feeling his way on to the broomstick with his eyes shut. “I was looking forward to a convivial evening, just me and you.”
“It is just me and you.”
“Yes, but I hadn't assumed there'd be a broomstick involved.”
The stick left the ground slowly Casanunda clung miserably to the bristles.