Once inside my room, I release his hand, allowing mine to fall back to my side.
He grabs the hem of his shirt and drags it partway up his abdomen before pausing. “Is it okay if I take off my shirt and shorts?”
My mouth dries as I jerk my head into a tight nod.
He yanks the soft cottony material over his head before dropping it carelessly to the floor. The shorts get removed next. Once they are added to the small pile, he stands in front of me wearing nothing more than form-fitting boxers. Even in the shadowy darkness of the room, I’m able to make out the hard ridges and contours of his muscular body.
Unable to help myself, I stand rooted in place, simply drinking him in. Football and a rigorous weightlifting regimen have molded his physique into a thing of beauty. Instead of being bulky like a lineman, he’s long and lean. His body was built for quickness and speed.
As I shake myself out of those thoughts, I realize that he’s studying me with an equal amount of intensity. My muscles tense as air gets trapped in my lungs, making it impossible to breathe.
His gaze is like a physical caress, and my body reacts accordingly. When my nipples tighten, poking through the thin fabric of my tank top, I lift my arms self-consciously to cover them. Before I can fully wrap them around my chest, Colton reaches out, halting the movement. “Don’t. I want to look at you.” There’s a pause as his voice turns rough, sounding as if it’s been scraped from the bottom of the ocean. “I’ve missed this so much.”
Hesitantly, I lower my arms and straighten to my full height, allowing him to look his fill. I’ve never been embarrassed of my body. I’ve spent my entire life in a leotard. I’m used to scathing remarks from teachers. I’ve become almost deaf to the criticism.
But this...
I want Colton to like what he sees. The appreciative gleam filling his eyes tells me that he does.
This time, when he extends his hand, it never occurs to me not to take hold of it. With one tug, he pulls me toward the bed. He climbs in first before turning on his side. Once he’s settled, I crawl in next to him until our bodies are perfectly aligned. His bigger one curling protectively around my smaller one. His arm bands around me, locking me in place. For the first time in what feels like forever, contentment suffuses every fiber of my being.
Now that Colton is holding me in his arms, I realize this is the reason I couldn’t fall asleep. I needed him here with me. Even though I’ve spent all this time fighting against him, trying to break free of the hold he has on me, it turns out that I’ve been battling myself as well. It’s a relief to drop the pretense.
At least for the night.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Colton
Harsh sunlight filters through my eyelids, and I wake with a satisfied stretch. It’s been a while since I’ve felt this well-rested. Like I slept for twenty-four hours straight. As soon as I shift, I realize that I’m not alone. There’s a warm body snuggled up against me.
It takes a moment for my sluggish brain to sift through the events from last night.
Alyssa.
Dinner at my place.
Unable to sleep and shooting her a text.
I crack open an eye only to find her sprawled across my bare chest. There is nothing better than waking up with this girl in my arms. Even though my feelings for her scared the shit out of me, I regret pushing her away sophomore year. I have no idea if it’s possible to get back to a place where she can trust me again, but I’m determined to do everything in my power to make it happen and prove to Alyssa that I can be the man she needs.
All I know is that I’ve got to slow my roll and not come on too strong. If I push too hard, she’ll bolt. And I can’t blame her for that. She handed over her heart for safekeeping, and I stomped it to smithereens.
A strange contentment fills me as I watch her sleep. Even though I want this moment to last forever, I know it won’t. As soon as she wakes, the protective armor she cloaks herself in will fall back into place, and she’ll continue to hold me at arm’s length.
Unable to resist touching her, I stroke my fingers over her golden head. Alyssa has beautiful long hair. I love having it swathed across my body. I love wrapping the thick length around my fist and tugging it. I told myself when we were together that it was pure and simple fucking. She’d always been up for anything. Whatever I wanted to do. However I wanted to use her body, she let me do it. She was always willing to push the limits.