Ruined (Ethan Frost 1)

Without warning, I go careening over the edge of an orgasm so intense, so shattering, that for long moments I lose myself. I forget everything—the pain, the fear, the rage, the devastation—and just feel.

Before the tremors even stop, Ethan is on his knees behind me. He grabs on to my thighs with his huge hands, yanks my legs apart. I’m spread wide open for him now, so wide that I’m off balance and the only things holding me up are the wall in front of me and Ethan behind me.

The aftershocks of ecstasy are still tearing through me, and I’m off-kilter. Vulnerable. And hurt—still so hurt. But before any of the feelings can take a firm hold, Ethan lifts me up onto my tiptoes and shoves his tongue deep inside me.

I scream. Clutch at the wall. Try to hold on to the last broken pieces of myself that I can claim as my own. But Ethan won’t have it. Not now. Not this time.

He wants everything, every little shard that I have left, and he’s not shy about claiming them. Claiming me.

His tongue is everywhere—circling my clit, sliding along my labia, thrusting deep inside me.

His fingers are everywhere—pinching my nipples and my clit, sliding along the sensitive skin at the bends of my knees and elbows, digging into my thighs and grounding me with small pinches of pain.

He’s everywhere—behind me, beside me, inside me so deep that I know I’ll never get him out.

Not now. Not after this.

The pleasure is building again, taking me higher and higher and higher until I can’t think, can’t breathe, can’t do anything but feel. I’m insensate with it, completely overwhelmed. Completely under his spell. Just the way Ethan wants me.

With a twist of his tongue, he sends me tumbling into ecstasy again. And again. And again.

Time loses meaning, everything does, until there’s nothing—no one—but Ethan and me and the cataclysmic heat between us.

I’m holding on to t

he wall now, my fingers seeking purchase, surcease, as my entire body trembles violently. I can’t take much more without breaking, but I don’t want it to be over, either. Don’t want it to end. Not until I feel Ethan inside me one last time.

“Do it,” I choke out. “Damn you. Just do it. ”

Ethan’s only answer is to thrust his tongue even deeper inside me at the same time as he presses his thumb slowly, inexorably, into my anus.

My knees buckle as another climax roars through me. This time not even the wall can hold me up. My body starts to sag, to slide down, but Ethan catches me like he always does. Holds me in place. And sends me careening over the edge one more time.

I’m crying now, hot tears of pleasure and pain rolling down my face as sobs rack my body. It’s too much. Too much. Too much. I can’t take anymore.

Ethan knows—like he always does—and suddenly he’s on his feet again. He turns me to face him and through my tears I see the same ecstasy and agony that I’m feeling reflected back at me from his damn oceanic eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he tells me even as he presses hot kisses against my forehead, my cheeks, my lips. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. ”

“Just do it,” I choke out. “Please. I can’t—”

His mouth takes mine in a kiss so ripe with emotion—with pain and pleasure and everything in between—that all I can do is open myself and take everything he needs to give me.

Then he’s lifting me up, and he’s strong enough that he doesn’t even need the wall to help support me. Instead, he holds tight and growls, “Wrap your arms and legs around me. ”

I do, and that’s when he slides deep inside me with one powerful thrust.

“Oh, God. Baby. Oh, God. ” He buries his face in my neck, and even as pleasure races through me I register the feel of hot tears against my skin.

“Ethan. ” My fingers tangle in his hair, and I try to pull his head up so I can see his eyes. But he refuses to look at me. He’s shaking and shuddering now, so badly that he finally does press me against the wall for added support.

He’s kissing and licking the bend of my neck, sending new sparks of pleasure shooting up and down my spine. But the tremors are still racking his body and I can still feel the tears.

I can’t help it. Destroyed and devastated though I am, I can’t see him like this and not ache. I wrap my arms around him, pull him even closer.

“I love you,” I whisper into his ear, relinquishing the final, broken piece of myself into his care. I can’t stop myself, don’t want to stop myself, even knowing he might very well throw it back in my face before this night is over. “I love you, Ethan Frost, and will until the day I die. ”

“Chloe!” He grabs my face in his hands, his mouth latching onto mine like a dying man who has finally found salvation. Seconds later he starts to come, and I pull him closer, hold him tight, as he empties all that he is inside me.