Since I hadn’t shut the bathroom door, Daisy thought nothing of walking in.
“Molly, do you know where the—”
She took one look at my face and froze. Clearly, she had no idea what to do. We were friendly, but it wasn’t like I told her my problems. She seemed torn between coddling me and running out of the bathroom to get as far away from me as she could. “Are you…okay?”
I sniffled. “I just need a few minutes.”
“Sure, of course. Do you…want me to stay? Is there something you want to talk about?”
I shook my head. “No, I’m sorry. It’s just been a long day. I’ll be out in five.”
“Don’t be silly. Take all the time you need. I’ll cover the desk for as long as it takes. It’s quiet right now, anyway.”
“Thanks, Daisy.”
***
The next morning, I wasn’t ready to go home after my shift ended. I hadn’t been to see my dad in a few days, so after texting Kayla to make sure it was okay, I picked up some bagels and headed to their house.
“Hey, Dad.” I leaned down and kissed his cheek when I arrived. He had a home oxygen system set up now, but the plastic face mask was hanging on the back of the kitchen chair he sat in. I fingered it. “Umm… This works best when it’s on, believe it or not.”
Dad shook his head. “Wiseass. You sound like Kayla. I’m drinking my coffee. I feel fine.”
Every time I came to see him, he looked a little worse. Being a nurse, I was used to seeing sick patients deteriorate, but Dad’s decline was not the norm. The difference between small cell and non-small cell cancers was really staggering. It was almost as if we were watching the rapid spread on the inside happen on the outside, too.
I put the bag of bagels on the table. “I brought your favorite.”
He smiled. “Oh yeah? You remember my favorite?”
“Of course I do. Salt—the more of it, the better. Probably not the best thing to bring you, considering what it can do to your blood pressure.”
My father waved me off. “That’s the least of my worries.”
I dug into the bag. “I’ll make it for you. Cream cheese or butter?”
“Butter, please.”
Kayla came down from upstairs while I was making Dad’s breakfast. We said hello, and she walked over to Dad and kissed him on the forehead. “I’m going to run some errands.”
“Okay, dear.”
“I’ll be back in about an hour. Can you stay that long, Molly?”
My father answered for me with a grumble. “I don’t need a babysitter.”
She rolled her eyes. Clearly this wasn’t the first time he’d given her a hard time about this. “Of course you don’t. But the doctor said you need rest, at least until your blood count is back to normal. So it makes me feel better to know someone is around in case you feel dizzy again.”
“Doctors just cover their asses.”
I chuckled. “I guess you should know.”
After Kayla left, my father and I ate breakfast. We made small talk, and I’d thought I was doing a good job hiding the turmoil I felt inside. But after he finished eating, he leaned back in his chair and squinted at me.
“Are you worried about me, or is something else going on?”
My brows furrowed. “What do you mean?”
He looked down at my hands. “You pick at the cuticle on your thumbs when you’re nervous.”
I totally did, but I didn’t realize my dad knew that. I tucked my thumb into a fist to stop myself and sighed. “It was just a long night.”
“A delivery gone wrong?”
I shook my head. “No, nothing like that.”
“Okay…”
Dad waited. I didn’t want him to think my issue was because of him. I mean, of course that was always in the back of my mind, but that wasn’t what he was seeing on my face today. So I thought it might be best to put his mind at ease.
“It’s a…a man problem.”
Dad sipped his coffee. “Okay. Well, believe it or not, I am one of those, so lay it on me.”
It was hard to explain, and I wasn’t sure my situation was something I wanted to get into with my dad. We’d never discussed my dating life or anything like that. “I’m just struggling with what I think is the right choice for me.”
Dad nodded. “That happens to be a subject I’m an expert on.”
At first I was confused, but then I realized he was referring to my mom and Kayla. I’d only ever looked at what happened from an abandoned child’s side, not from the point of view of a man in a relationship.
“What happened between you and Mom, Dad? I’ve only ever heard it from her.”
My father sighed. “How much time do you have? I think that story could take a while.”
I smiled. “Tell me the abbreviated version.”