I kiss her on the cheek, an odd state of numbness falling over me as I slip into the room. I’m preparing for the worst. My brain in high gear, considering the potential outcome should Hanna lose the baby. I shut those thoughts down because they’re not going to help me. I can lose my shit later, but Hanna needs my support.
Her face is pale, her cheeks tear-stained. But the second she sees me, she reaches out and half-tries to get up off the ultrasound table despite the fact the nurse is attempting to take her blood pressure.
I rush over to her and take her face in my palms. “I’m here. I’ve got you. We’re gonna get through this together. All three of us.” I hope like hell that’s not a lie. The nurse gives up trying to take her blood pressure for a minute while I calm Hanna down, encouraging her to slow her panicked breathing.
Most of what she says is incoherent, which is unnerving, but she keeps telling me how much she wants this baby and she doesn’t want to lose him.
I stay for every part of the exam they’ll allow.
After three hours and a lot of tests, the doctor tell us that Hanna fainted as a result of her gestational hypertension and not eating enough before she went to visit the girls.
The doctor advises modified bed rest, and they keep her overnight to make sure Hanna’s blood pressure isn’t too high, and give her steroids to help mature the baby’s lung, should she go into labor sooner than we’d like, or they’re unable to keep her blood pressure under control. The doctors allow Queenie and King to come into the room, but everyone else has been sent home hours ago, with the promise of text updates.
Queenie and King are only allowed to stay for a few minutes. King whispers in Hanna’s ear, his face a mask of worry as he hugs her and promises to come back in the morning.
Once they leave for home, I settle into the chair beside her bed and take her hand in mine. “You need to sleep.”
“I know. You should go home and get some rest, too. You must be exhausted. And the team has practice in the afternoon.”
“Alex will handle all of that. I’m not going home until you do.” I lace our fingers together and bow my head, kissing the back of her hand.
“That chair is a terrible place to sleep.”
“They’ll bring me a cot if I ask.” I brush a few stray hairs from her forehead. She looks spent, which makes sense since she’s had one hell of a day. “Listen, I know we’re still navigating this relationship and where it’s going, but I don’t love the idea of you being on your own in that house when you’re supposed to be on bed rest and taking it easy. How would you feel about coming to stay with me? After the baby is born, we can reassess and see where things are?” I don’t want to push her into a decision, but the thought of something like this happening and her being alone is untenable.
She’s silent for a few seconds, maybe mulling it over. “I think that’s probably a smart plan.”
I exhale a relieved breath. “I know you don’t need me to take care of you, but being able to ensure you’re safe and okay on a daily basis is going to keep my blood pressure down.”
She chuckles and brings our clasped hands to her belly, settling them there. “I definitely don’t want you in the same boat as me.” Her expression grows serious. “I was scared today, Jake.”
“Me, too.” I trace the contour of her face, the contact as much to console her as it is to ground me. “Let’s try to keep your stress levels to a minimum for the next sixteen weeks, okay?”
“Okay.”
“It’s you and me, Hanna. We’re in this together.” I seal that promise with a kiss.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
Selfless Love
Hanna
I’M RELEASED FROM the hospital the next morning, early enough that no one has had a chance to visit. Jake drives me back to my place and makes me lie down while he packs my essentials. It seems ridiculous to have this house sitting empty when I’ve only been living here for a handful of weeks, but I agree that living on my own is not in either of our best interests.
While I may have felt the need for independence when I first moved to Seattle, in the weeks since I’ve been here, I’ve realized that it had less to do with moving in with Jake and more to do with my fear of things changing too quickly, or the pressure it would put on our relationship. I didn’t want to force closeness before I felt ready. Or become an inconvenience in his life.