Ahead of me, Lauren caught up with her brother’s longer strides. “You can’t just walk away from this conversation.”
He stopped abruptly and turned back on her, crossing his arms. “It’s not going to happen.”
Lauren mirrored him. “Oh, yes it is.”
“It’s not your choice to make.”
She scoffed. “And who made it yours? Or do you think you have more sway than the two of us? Because I’m pretty sure Anna and I are also on the deed.”
“Nothing happens to the land unless all three of us agree.”
“Or unless we vote.”
Mike’s voice shot up. “This isn’t a fucking democracy!”
Lauren’s fury matched her brother’s. “Yeah? I don’t know why you think your say carries more weight in this family than mine and Anna’s. You’re barely even here. You don’t know what this family is—”
Mike’s eyes narrowed into slits. “I have always been there for you.”
“What, with money? Since when is that a cure all? Can you plaster green paper over broken hearts or use it for company? Do enough zeroes cure loneliness, or keep your sister in school, or your mother from depression?”
Mike spun around. “I did what I had to do to keep us going! Where were you when Dad died? Were you making arrangements and comforting Mom and finding out about gravestones and life insurance? No, you were crying in your room!”
Her eyes widened and her face turned splotchy. “You still want credit from ten years ago? I was fourteen!”
My head whipped back and forth as they shouted, but at this point Lauren stormed off. Anna stopped long enough to hiss “Good fucking job” at her brother, before running after Lauren.
We stood alone on the hill. “I’m sorry.” The fog swallowed my words, and I tried again. “I’m sorry. I—I didn’t realize this would happen.
He said nothing.
“So...what happens now?”
He turned to me with a twisted smile. “Why? Want to know if your dig’s actually going through?”
“Mike.” I took a step closer. “That’s not what I meant.”
He took a deep breath and pushed his hands through his hair. “I don’t know. Do I screw up our family forever by refusing to allow the excavation? Or do I sign, and then risk...”
“Risk what?” I asked, when he didn’t go on. “Mike, what’s so wrong with digging at Kilkarten?”
He pinched the skin between his fingers, furrowed his brow and breathed out. His lips parted as he began to say something. I held my breath.
And then he paused and the wrinkles on his forehead disappeared. His eyes widened and focused on me. “There’s one other way.”
I shook my head, not following him.
“You could tell Lauren you’re no longer interested. Then it doesn’t matter whether I sign or not.”
My stomach fell away. “But—then I have no chance at excavating Kilkarten.”
“You never had a chance at it.”
“No, I didn’t, not in the beginning—but now I do.”
We faced off, that awful truth between us.
His jaw tightened. “And if I said I wouldn’t sign? That you’re still not going to excavate, so it doesn’t matter one way or the other?”