The Sinner (The St. Clair Brothers 1)

hat you thought.”

Kylie pulled back and left my arm hanging stupidly in midair. I tucked it into my lap. Her bottom lip trembled. “It's complicated, Seb. Just… trust me. We can't keep seeing each other.” With no further explanation, Kylie stood and I fucking panicked.

I jumped out of the chair and grabbed her arm. “Why are you doing this? What is so bad that you're willing to throw away something we both know is amazing?” She continued to shake her head. I crowded close to whisper in her ear and Kylie’s scent filled my nose. My eyelids drooped and my cock took interest. God I missed her. “Kylie, this isn't like me. I don't beg, and I swear, I've never been interested enough in a woman to do it, but I'm doing it now. For you. Please. I’m begging you not to leave. You're the first, the only, woman I've wanted this way. You're special and I don't know why because I hardly know you. That's what I'm asking for, the chance to know you.”

Kylie's voice was low and cracked periodically, like she was about to break down for real. “You're a good man, Sebastien St. Clair.” She stepped away and I let her go. “Goodbye.”

Once again, I watched Kylie walk out on me.

This time for good.

12

Seb

It took a good three minutes of standing in the hall, going back and forth in my mind, trying to figure out if I was making the right decision, before I finally said, "fuck it" and knocked. Loud footsteps approached from inside and I snorted. Evvy isn’t exactly light on his feet. On the ice maybe, but on land, the guy’s about as graceful as a charging rhino. I was wound so tight, I flinched at the slide of the deadbolt, then cursed myself for being such a pussy. The door opened to reveal my best friend—distant best friend as of late, but still my best friend. I hoped so anyway. Hell, after the way I'd acted the last couple months, I wouldn’t blame Ev for kicking my ass to Vancouver and back.

We must've drifted farther apart than I thought, because from the way Ev’s eyes narrowed and he crossed his arms over his chest, he wasn’t thrilled to see me.

I scuffed my foot on the doormat and ignored the prickly heat in my face. “Hey, Ev. You got a minute?”

Ev blinked and his posture relaxed somewhat. He held the door open and stepped back. “C’mon in.” Ev closed the door and I stood in the center of the room, feeling like the king of all shitheads. “Want a beer?”

Thank fuck for Evvy and his ability to be laid back in a tense situation.

I exhaled. “God yes.”

He laughed and grabbed two from the fridge, popping the caps. Ev returned to the living room and extended one to me. “Have a seat.” I took the beer and sat on one of the leather sofas, while Evvy flopped onto his favorite recliner. The ancient thing creaked under his weight. Held together by duct tape and a prayer, the battered cushion was probably permanently dented in the shape of his asscheeks. “So, what's up?”

Using blunt fingernails, I picked at the pale ale label , not sure where to start. Let’s just say discussing feelings and shit isn’t in my wheelhouse.

“I guess… I mean, honestly? I don't know.” Ev frowned and scratched his stubbled chin as he gave me a blank look. Fuck, I was going to have to say it. Out loud. “I’m sorry,” I blurted. “For acting like such a dick.” Evvy sat back and snapped his mouth shut with an audible click. I didn’t blame him for being shocked as hell. I don’t apologize to anyone, and he knew it. “No, it's true. And I don't want you to say everything is okay or give me an easy out.” I took a sip of beer, placed the bottle on the coffee table, and rested my elbows on my knees, hands laced between them. “I know sometimes I act like a bastard—”

Ev barked out a laugh and shook his head. “Understatement of the year, my friend.”

My lips tugged up and a chuckle rumbled from my chest. “Right? But seriously, these past weeks…” My fingers twitched, needing something to do. I snagged the beer and threw back a long swig. After wiping my mouth on my sleeve, I stared at a random spot on the carpet. A beat later, I took a deep breath and looked back up at Ev. “There's no excuse for my behavior. I just don't want you to think it has anything to do with you, man, because it doesn’t.”

The amused expression slid from Evvy’s face and he shifted to sit on the edge of the cushion. The poor recliner creaked loudly. “Is everything okay? Is it your brother?”

No one knows the ugly truth about the St. Clair brothers. Not Rémy's dark secret, and definitely not mine. Not even Ev. But Ev’s been around long enough to overhear plenty of conversations I had with Rémy and he knew damn well how protective I got.

I tightened my grip around the beer and shook my head. “No. Rémy's fine.”

Evvy frowned, tilted his head to the side, and stared. I started to sweat under the scrutiny. Nervous, I took another long swallow. Eventually, Ev put me out of my misery. “Is it…? Does this have anything to do with that chick? You know, the hot blonde?”

My heart stuttered along with my ability to speak. “You… I don't… I mean…” Fuck it. I slumped back on the sofa. “Shit.”

Fucking Ev. Too goddamn observant. I didn't know whether to throw the bottle at his head and run, or snatch him out of that hideous fucking chair and hug the guy for forcing me to man up and admit what had me twisted tighter than a virgin’s panties at a bukkake. I put the beer back on the table and dragged both hands down my face.

“I have no clue how you do that shit, Evvy. You must be a fucking mind reader. Yeah, it has to do with her.” I expected Ev to proceed by drilling me about Kylie, but he didn't. He just drank his beer and waited for me to elaborate. “Jesus.” I grunted. “You're gonna make me say it, aren't you?”

Evvy grinned. “Yep.”

“Bastard,” I said with zero heat behind it. I sighed and cracked my neck, then proceeded to spill my guts all over Calvin Everette’s living room floor. By the time I finished, Ev was speechless. In fact, he gaped in obvious disbelief. Waiting for Ev to spew a bunch of judgmental shit and rude jokes about me acting like a chick sent my anxiety through the roof. The silence between us grew heavier and thicker by the second until I was so fucking tense, I lashed out. “What, don't have anything to say?”

Ev exhaled loudly and scratched his whiskers again. The battered chair screeched in protest when he leaned all of his weight on one rickety arm and a tuft of fluff popped out of a tiny tear. “Honestly? You’re an unpredictable guy. I’m used to dealing with it. I didn’t think there was anything you could say or do that could shock me. But this? I'm trying to take it all in. It's just, I don’t know, kind of hard to believe.”

I scowled and fought the urge to jump to my feet and start swinging. “What's so hard to believe?” I was pissed. I just bared my goddamn soul and Ev was being an asshole about it. My fingers dug into the cushions as I reined in my temper. An unpleasant realization smacked me upside the head and I bolted upright, bristling with anger. “Oh, I get it. You think it's funny I got dumped, right? That it, Evvy? It’s fucking hilarious, right? You think I got what I had coming to me after treating women like shit all these years?” Ev wasn't wrong about that, but I didn't come here for my best friend to dump all over me.