Found in Us (Lost 2)

"It went bankrupt because of me."

"How so?"

"My brother made some lousy investment decisions over the years. I repeatedly warned him he was going to lose his company if he didn't change strategies, but I might as well have talked to the moon. Eventually he got into deep financial troubles. When the banks refused to bail him, he showed up on my doorstep. And you know what I did? I closed it right back in his face. Told him it served him right."

"Why didn't he borrow money from your mom?"

"Pride was one reason," Parker says. "He didn't want Mum to know. Blakesley Enterprises belonged to my dad. After his death, my uncle, Helen's dad, wanted to step in and help, but Mum refused. She ran the company with some advisors. When Robert got out of college, he started working at the company and was running it after two years. He—how do I put it—wasn't the right person for the job."

"Why didn't you get involved? Since it was your father's company and all."

"I didn't want to. By the time I was out of college, I didn't want anything to do with my brother or my mother, and kept myself out of anything involving them—including the company. I shouldn't have. This was my father's legacy."

Despite the cool appearance, I can see just how much this consumes him. He grabs the pen in front of him; his eyes can't hide the shadow that suddenly creeps over them. I'd like nothing better than to kiss him, take his mind off it so he won't torment himself anymore. But I have a feeling he needs to talk about this and let it all out.

"My brother made a lot of risky investments. In the hands of a more skilled businessman, like James for example, perhaps those investments could have brought him a fortune. But I never thought my brother had the necessary skill, and I had no problem letting him know how I felt. I have no doubt he made some of those decisions specifically because I advised him not to. I told you he was very competitive. He was trying to prove me wrong. "

"That's extremely childish," I say, standing a bit straighter in my seat and massaging my foot. "You make a bet with your brother, if you feel competitive. You don't put your business at risk."

"Clearly you have no idea how far men are willing to go if they let their ego drive them. He and I had had our differences over the years, since we were little. He sided with bullies at school against me. When we grew older, he started making a pass at the girls I liked."

"Did it ever work?"

He smiles sadly. "Just with one. It happened to be the only woman I'd ever been in love with."

I suck in my breath. I hadn't expected him to throw love into the mix.

“So what happened? With your brother and that woman?”

"She ran away with him. I could have forgiven him if he cared about her, but he didn't. He broke up with her soon after."

"So, you never fell in love again?"

Parker looks at me intently. "She tried to sell a sex tape of us to the press after my brother dumped her. I hadn’t even known she’d recorded us. She needed revenge and didn't really care how she'd get it. I kind of gave up on the concept of love afterward."

I gulp. So Helen wasn't exaggerating when she said people hadn't proven to be very trustworthy to him.

His shoulders slump a bit.

"I still don't get how you ended up taking over the company."

"I stepped in shortly before it would have been completely ruined."

"And he was okay with that?" I start playing with the hem of my right sleeve absently.

"About the time the creditors really started to threaten him, he gave up and left.”

Parker pushes himself farther from his desk, as if beckoning me to straddle him. I do just that. I walk over to him and climb in his lap, putting my arms loosely around his neck.

"Mum came to see me after he took off. Begged me to take over the company and save it. I took off for California for a few months instead. By the time I came back and made up my mind to take it over, the company was a wreck. So really, the answer to your question is, I probably took it over out of guilt."

I push a strand of his dark blond hair behind his ear. "No, Parker. It's because you are kind."

He snorts, pushing my hand away. "I just told you I bankrupted my father's company by refusing to help my brother out and then by taking off to California instead of facing my responsibilities, and you think I'm kind? That's an interesting yardstick you're using."

I don't give up. "For one, your brother is a horrible person. Just because he was your brother doesn't mean you had to bail him out. Especially when you'd warned him he was in the wrong. And second, you needed time to think. So what? It was a big decision."

When Parker doesn't say anything, I put my head on his chest and interlace my fingers with his. "You know, there are a lot of people around you who think you are a kind person. Serena, for example."