When Megan has drunk the rest of her bottle, I settle her against my shoulder to burp her. “I think I saw this in a movie.”
“You’re doing great. Also, you deliver babies.”
“Yes.”
“You don’t hold them?”
“I pull them out and hand them to their mom or a nurse, and then I go about the task of making sure Mom doesn’t die.”
“That’s important,” he says, nodding. “I had no idea that babies make you nervous.”
“Well, I’m not as nervous as I was when you first arrived. Thank goodness she’s not your secret baby.”
“I couldn’t have a secret baby in this town.”
We both laugh. “True. There aren’t many secrets around here.”
“She’s asleep,” he says and drags his fingertip down her cheek. “She’s a sweetie.”
“I’m surprised she’s not more fussy. You always hear of them crying all the time unless they’re asleep. That doesn’t sound fun. I always wonder, why would anyone willingly put themselves through that?”
“Is that why you don’t want kids?” he asks.
I pause, thinking about it. This baby is definitely adorable. She’s small, fitting against my chest perfectly, and she smells so good. I could bury my nose in her and stay there all day.
“I mean, she’s going to wake up, right?”
“If all goes well, yes,” he says, laughing again.
“And she’ll cry. And probably need a lot of attention.”
“She’s an infant, so I’d say that’s a safe assumption.”
I nod, still thinking it over. “I guess that doesn’t sound too bad. But I know without a doubt that I don’t want to be pregnant. It goes back to me knowing too much. Most pregnancies are normal, but I see way too many that aren’t. It’s not something I’ve felt the need to experience for myself.”
“Interesting,” he says, sitting back on the sofa and watching me. “I guess I’d never really thought about that.”
“You’re a man. You don’t have to worry about the changes to your body, or how well your body will even deal with being pregnant. And that’s only the beginning. There can be so many different complications, diseases, disorders, and problems that it would take a month to list them all.”
“And you’d worry the entire time.”
“Every minute of it,” I confirm. “And I know, it sounds—”
“Don’t say dumb. You’re not dumb, Hannah.”
“Well, it sounds dumb to me,” I reply with a shrug. “But it is what it is.”
I pull the sleeping baby off of my chest and into my arms, so I can see her sweet face. Her lips are pursed, as if she’s sucking on a nipple in her dream. “Her eyelashes are long. They’re always wasted on babies and men.”
“She looks like her mom,” he says, just as there’s a knock on the door. “Speaking of which, there they are.”
“So soon?”
He tosses me a wide smile and answers the door. “She’s sleeping.”
“Oh, good,” Dan says as they come inside. His wife, whom I immediately recognize, rushes over to check on her.
“Dr. Malone,” she says with a happy smile. “What a surprise.”
“Hi Alice,” I reply and nod to Dan. “I didn’t realize this little bundle belonged to you.”
“You mean you didn’t recognize her?” Dan asks with a smile.
“She was a little smaller and a lot bluer that day,” I reply and smile kindly at Alice. “She’s beautiful and healthy, and I’m so happy for you.”
“She’s here because of you,” Alice says with tears in her eyes and wraps her arms around both of us, hugging us. “You saved us.”
“That’s the job,” I say and pass the baby to her mama. “And I have to tell you, this might be the first time I’ve spent time with a baby that I delivered. It was fun. I had no idea this tiny baby was that Megan.”
“Well, thanks to both of you for taking her so we could have an uninterrupted dinner out,” Dan says, shaking Brad’s hand. “It was nice.”
“My pleasure,” Brad says. He runs out to the garage to get the car seat base, and when they’ve left with the baby, he turns to me with a raised eyebrow. “I didn’t know that you were the doctor who delivered her.”
“I was.”
“That was a shit show.”
“It was.” I nod, not allowed to talk freely with Brad about the medical history. “But as you can see, it all worked out.”
He frowns and looks down, and then without looking me in the eyes, he just pulls me in and hugs me tightly.
“Dan would have lost both of them if it hadn’t been for you, and I just want to say thank you for saving them both. Dan’s a good friend.”
“It’s the job,” I repeat, but hug him back fiercely. “And I’m happy that it all worked out for the best.”
He kisses me head, breathing me in.
“Me too.”
***
My car smells like heaven the next morning.
The aroma of coffee and donuts fills the space around me, and I want to just pull over and eat and drink it all myself.