“I sure do.”

Brandt tuned them out as they bickered. He tuned them out so completely it took, “Whoa, Brandt, you’re gonna miss the turn,” to get his focus back.

At least fifteen pickups were parked at Cord and AJ’s house. Staring at Cord’s big house, Brandt had that same wistful feeling he’d felt at Ben’s. Not wanting a fancy place to hang his hat, but a home, his own home. His trailer wasn’t much more than a place to crash every night.

His brothers were quiet and Brandt wondered if they were thinking the same thing. Landon yelled,

“Up!” and drummed his feet into his carseat.

“We hear ya. I’ll get him since I’m already back here,” Tell said.

After he got out of his truck, Brandt was surprised to see his mother walking toward him. Did that mean his dad had decided to show up at the annual McKay post-Thanksgiving get together? “I didn’t think you guys were comin’ today.”

“Your dad isn’t. I left him at home.” His mother’s eyes darted to where Dalton and Tell were unloading Landon. But she didn’t go over to offer them help.

“You okay?” She actually seemed nervous, which was crazy because she’d been coming to McKay family events for four decades.

Her pale blue eyes shifted to him. Her dark hair, once streaked with silver, was now all silver. Again, it struck him how much she’d aged since Luke’s death. Her smiles were rare these days, too, so when she laughed, Brandt didn’t know how to react.

“Honestly? I’m nervous, even when I know that’s just plain stupid. It’s strange showing up at a McKay family party without your father, but ain’t no one gonna be cryin’ in their beer Casper ain’t here.

Especially not his brothers.”

“Which puts you in an awkward position.”

“Yeah, but it’s not the first time nor will it be the last. Kimi and Carolyn and Vi have always treated me well, even when they can’t stand Casper.” She turned and looked at the house. “Hard to believe how long your father and I have been married. But when his brothers and their wives all started havin’ babies…

I’d come to these things and cry for days afterward because I wanted what they had.”

He knew his mother wasn’t only speaking about kids.

“Then my boys came,” she absentmindedly reached out and stroked Brandt’s coat sleeve, “and I fit in.

I could join in the discussions about toilet training, frogs in the bathtub, and the ranching responsibilities you’d all have to live up to as you grew into men.

“Then in recent years it’s been about grandbabies and I’ve had that feeling of envy all over again. Oh, I know you boys are younger than your McKay cousins and weren’t nowhere near ready to settle down, but I’d hoped Luke and Jessie might…but that never happened. And now we’ve got Landon…”

Feeling helpless, Brandt grabbed her hand because it was so unlike her to babble.

“After Luke died, I didn’t care about anything. Especially not about them and their perfect kids and darling little grandkids and how they didn’t have to deal with the unending pain of losing a child. I became bitter. As bitter as your father. I shut down and your dad got meaner yet. I ain’t gonna make excuses for him, but I will apologize for myself. I haven’t been much of a mother to you boys since we lost Luke, and I should’ve tried harder. I should’ve pulled you boys closer, not pushed away from all of you when we needed each other more than ever—”

“Mom. Stop.” Brandt tugged her into his arms. “Just stop.” She was absolutely breaking his heart.

“No,” Tell said from behind him, “Let her talk if she wants to.”

“We’ll listen to anything she has to say,” Dalton added. “She needs to know that.”

Brandt hadn’t heard his brothers come up behind them, but he was damn happy they were here.

She pushed back from Brandt and wiped her tears. “I’ve been thinking about this a lot over the last month and wanted to talk to you boys yesterday. On Thanksgiving. To let you know how thankful I am for each of you, but…well. You were there. Wasn’t exactly a Norman Rockwell painting, was it?”

None of them could look at each other, which was just weird.

“Sorry.” She used a lace hankie to wipe her nose. “I didn’t mean to blather like a fool and get so weepy.”

A moment of silence passed as they all struggled.

“It’s okay, Mom. Tell cries all the damn time. It’s sort of embarrassin’ if you wanna know the truth,”

Dalton mock-whispered.

Tell probably would’ve shoved him, but Dalton was holding a wide-eyed Landon.

She smiled wanly, shaking her head with that “boys will be boys” look of resignation Brandt recognized. “How long have you been here?”

“An hour.”

“You’ve been sitting in your car in the cold for an hour? Why?”

“Because I didn’t want to go in there by myself.” She sniffed and laughed at the same time. “Stupid, huh?”

“Not stupid. You were just waiting for us, right?”

She nodded and wiped her cheeks.

Brandt was afraid she’d start crying again, and he knew how much that’d embarrass her in front of their McKay relatives. He looked at Dalton. “How about if you let Mom carry Landon inside?”

If he thought his mother was done with tears, he was mistaken. Because for some reason, that made her cry harder.

A few hours later, the noise level in Cord and AJ’s house still rivaled the floor of the New York Stock Exchange.

Kids and dogs running everywhere, inside and out. Men gathered in the den shouting at a football game on TV. Pregnant women in the kitchen. Nursing mothers and babies in the living room. Still more kids racing up and down the stairs. It was pure chaos.

Brandt loved every second of it. He wished Jessie were here because he knew she’d love it too.

“Kane?” Ginger shouted from the living room.

“I’ll get him,” Brandt said. He wandered to the den where his uncles were sacked out in the easy chairs, snoring, while his cousins were crouched on the floor, surrounded by kids, trying to watch the game.

“Kane? Ginger’s lookin’ for you.”

“I’m there.” Immediately Kane pushed to his feet and brushed past Brandt as he lingered in the doorway.

A collective groan arose at a play on the football field.

Tags: Lorelei James Rough Riders Billionaire Romance
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