Before she can open her mouth to tell me no, I leave my bedroom and close the door behind me. I try—I really try—not to think about her naked in my shower, but I still think about her naked in my shower as soon as the water turns on. So I don’t get a hard-on from the images that keep flashing through my mind, I keep myself busy with cleaning up the dishes and putting away shit that’s been left out over the last couple of days. When Courtney comes out of my bedroom wearing my clothes, something in me shifts in a profound way. Everything becomes glaringly clear. I want her, and there is something between us—something huge. I haven’t felt this kind of attraction to a woman ever. I’ve never wanted to know everything about a woman, from the big stuff to the little details.
“Thank you for letting me use your shower.” She carries her wadded-up dress toward the island and tucks it inside her bag before turning to me. “I should go.”
“You gonna be able to get home okay?”
“Yeah, I’ll get a cab.” She smiles, and I find myself walking toward her.
“Have dinner with me.”
“I—” Her brows draw together, and she looks toward Maddi’s door.
“Not tonight,” I say, cutting her off. “Once Maddi’s better. Have dinner with me.”
“I don’t know . . .”
“Just dinner. Casual, as friends.” I know those last two words are a lie, but I don’t feel bad about it. I will gladly lie through my teeth to get her to take a chance on me.
“Okay. Sure,” she agrees. “And if you need anything at all, let me know. My place isn’t far from here, so if you need help, I can be over pretty quickly.”
“Thanks. And thanks again for all your help.” I shove my hands in the front pockets of my slacks so I don’t grab her like I want to.
“It wasn’t a big deal.”
“It was.”
“I just did what anyone else would have done.” She has no idea how untrue that is. While Eva and I were married, she would take off to hang out with her friends whenever Maddi was sick, saying she couldn’t deal because then she’d get sick herself. It used to piss me the fuck off but, like everything else, I ignored it so there wouldn’t be a fight.
I don’t tell Courtney any of that, though. Instead, I move closer to her. “Text when you get home so I know you made it safe.”
“I’m only about a five-minute cab ride. I’ll be okay.”
“Text when you get home,” I repeat.
Her eyes flare with what looks like surprise and appreciation before she nods and picks up her purse, sliding it over her shoulder and then slipping on her heels.
I walk her to the door, then lean down and touch my lips to her cheek before I open it for her. “Have a good night, Courtney.”
“You too, Lucas,” she whispers right before she walks away.
I watch until she’s out of sight before closing the door. I lean my forehead against the frame, really hoping that my gut is right about this woman and that she really is as sweet and perfect as I think she is.
Chapter 5
TAKING CARE OF YOU
COURTNEY
My stomach turns, and I close my eyes, praying the nausea that’s been plaguing me for most of the day will end soon. It’s been three days since I helped Lucas with his daughter. Until today I’ve felt great—better than great. I have been secretly living on cloud nine and walking on air at the idea of seeing Lucas again.
I know it’s too soon to be thinking about spending time with another man, but I want to get to know him. I also want to see him with Madeline again. I don’t think I have ever seen a man so devoted to his child. Watching them together is beautiful. The evening I left his place, I texted when I got home as he’d asked me to. Since then, we’ve shared a few messages. Mostly him updating me about Madeline, who was feeling better the next day, which gives me hope for myself.
I pull my blankets up around my chin and shiver. I woke up this morning feeling a little off, but I didn’t think much about it until I threw up the first time. Now I know feeling “off” was my body’s way of warning me that I was coming down with something. Luckily, it’s Saturday, so I don’t have to worry about calling in to work and letting Abby down. Still, there are a million things I would have liked to get done today. My cell phone beeps with a message, and it takes all my energy to lift my arm out from under my blankets and grab it. When I see I have a text, I swipe my finger across the screen and sigh in disappointment as I read the message from Lucas.