Eli looks at Todd for him to say something. “I think that you should see if you throw up anymore today.”
“But she’s not eating anything,” I tell him. “So there is nothing to throw up.”
Todd takes a big inhale, and he gets up, slapping me on the shoulder. “It’s going to be an interesting nine months.” He laughs, and I just look at Eli. Todd rips something from the machine and hands me the black and white sheet. “That is the first pictures of your children.” I look down, and it looks like two black circles with white dots. “Eli, call me if you have any questions.”
“I have questions.” I almost raise my hand, and Todd stops with his hand on the door. “Should she be on bed rest?”
“That is for her OB to decide, but if everything looks fine, then I don’t think she will be,” he says and rushes out before I have time to ask more questions. I look at Eli, who swings her legs off the table.
“Do you need to throw up?” I ask her and look around to see if I can spot a trash can.
“No,” she tells me and then looks down. “I want to go home,” she tells me, getting up and walking out. She is quiet the whole way home, and when we get home, she just walks up the stairs. I give her that space for three minutes while I walk to the kitchen and grab a water bottle and also a couple of the cookies I know she loves, and I walk upstairs slowly. When I enter the room, I see she isn’t in bed, and the door to the bathroom opens. She walks out with her face stained with tears, her eyes full of water, and the tip of her nose red.
She stands there in the bedroom we share, looking at me, her hands in front of her. “We need to talk,” she says, and for a second, my heart sinks to the floor.
“I brought you water.” I hold up one hand. “And cookies.” I hold up the other hand.
“You don’t have to do this,” she says, and the tears just roll down her cheeks one after another, and after the second one, she gives up trying to catch them.
“I have to take care of you,” I tell her.
“No, that’s the thing. You don’t have to take care of me. I can take care of myself.” I want to interrupt her, but she just keeps going. “I know this isn’t what you signed up for, and I understand that it’s a shock to you as well as to me. And I never ever wanted this to happen,” she says, and I start to walk to her, but she holds up her hands and shakes her head to stop me. “You’re the most amazing father to Aiden, and even though this wasn’t planned”—she puts a hand on her stomach to protect the babies—“I’m not holding you accountable for it.”
“Are you done yet?” I ask her, and she shakes her head.
“I won’t have an abortion,” she sobs. “I didn’t for Aiden, and I won’t for these two.”
“I’m giving you five seconds, and then I’m coming to you, so you better get whatever you need to say out,” I tell her, and I almost hiss it out.
“I’m having the babies,” she says.
“Well, I fucking hope so,” I finally say.
“What?” she whispers, and I turn now and walk into the closet and go to my little hiding spot, grabbing the square box that I bought the day after she moved in.
I walk back into the room, and she is still standing there where I left her. “When I left the boat, I left a piece of my heart with you. I mean, I left more than a piece of me with you. I looked for you and even went so far as to pray to Saint Anthony to find you. When I saw you, my heart started working again. It’s funny,” I say, looking down. “I was just going through the motions of life. Get up, go to work, have dinner with my parents, lunch with Nick. I wasn’t living my life. I was just moving along. But then you came back, and it was so much more. I woke up happy, and I fell in love with you from the minute you said this is our son.”
I get down on one knee in front of her, and she gasps in shock. “I’m not asking you to marry me because we are having twins,” I say, grabbing her hips and pulling them to my face, and I kiss her stomach. “I’m asking you to marry me because I love you more than the world itself. I’m asking you to marry me because, with you, everything is better; I’m asking you to marry me because you are the most amazing mother to our children; I’m asking you to marry me because I know that with you by my side holding my hand, everything is going to be better, and I’m asking you to marry me because I don’t want to think about what my life would be like without you in it. I’m asking you to marry me because, without you, I just exist. I’m asking you to marry me because there is not a day that goes by that I don’t fall more in love with you.”