I nodded. He stood beside my bed, half bent over me. If I’d reached out I could have grabbed his neck and pulled him down. My fingers itched to do just that, but I hadn’t forgotten his rejection not too long ago. He needed to make the next step and I wasn’t sure if coming into my room to wake me from a nightmare counted as one. I wanted it to. I sat up and my blankets fell down to my hips. I wore only a flimsy camisole. Romero’s eyes followed the movement, and lingered on my chest.
“Thanks for waking me. I had a dream about my mother.” I wasn’t sure why I said it. My nightmare was the last thing I wanted to think, much less talk to Romero about. His eyes returned to my face. Sometimes I thought I could drown in them. When he was around I felt so happy and light. Somehow I knew he was the one, the person I was meant to be with. I’d known it pretty much from the beginning. If there was something like fate, then this was it.
Romero brushed a strand of hair from my forehead and I leaned into the touch. Somehow he was closer now. “You miss her.”
I nodded. I did, but her last words haunted me more than her death. Her sadness over the things she’d missed, the longing in her eyes – I didn’t think I could ever forget that. Romero and I locked gazes and just stared at each other. In the dim light spilling from the corridor I could see the conflict in Romero’s eyes. I wanted to lean forward but I stopped myself. I had to be strong, had to have some self-respect.
I was about to say something, anything, to stop the mounting tension but then Romero leaned down and kissed me. I hadn’t expected him to and gasped against his lips, but my surprise lasted only a couple of seconds, then I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him back with everything I had. He put one knee down on my bed beside me and cradled my head. His kiss banished the last of my tiredness and the lingering sadness from my dream. I wasn’t sure how long we kissed, Romero kneeling on the bed and I half-sitting, but I came more alive with every second. Eventually I pulled back, my breathing harsh. There was an insistent pounding between my legs but I knew it would have been wrong to take things further tonight.
Romero stroked my cheek and was about to straighten but I caught his arm. “I don’t want to be alone tonight.”
I waited for protest but it didn’t come. My heart dropped when he walked toward the door. Would he leave without a word? Instead he closed the door silently before he returned to the bed. With every step that he took in my direction, my heart seemed to swell with emotion. Romero removed his gun holster and put it down on the nightstand, then slipped out of his shoes. I scooted to the other side of my bed to make room for him, excitement fluttering in my chest. He didn’t slip under the covers with me as I’d hoped, instead he stretched out on top of it. I peered over my shoulder at him. He looked tired, even more tired than I felt. He smiled. It looked almost resigned, with a hint of regret. He snuck his arm around my waist and hugged me to his body, my back pressed against his chest, with the blankets between us. I wanted that barrier gone but decided to let him have his way for tonight. I’d won a small battle, the war could wait. Despite the material bunched between us I was fairly sure I could feel how much our kiss had affected Romero. Smiling to myself, I closed my eyes. “Thanks for staying with me.”
Romero kissed the back of my head. “Get some sleep. I’ll keep the nightmares away.”
“I know you will,” I whispered.
***
When my alarm woke me the next morning, I was alone in bed. I sat up and pressed the button that let the curtains glide open. Blinding light greeted me and I quickly squeezed my eyes shut. When I’d finally grown used to the brightness I looked around in my room for a sign of Romero’s sleepover but there was nothing. It might as well have been a dream. For a heart-stopping moment I considered just that. I pressed my nose into the pillow and caught his scent. Not a dream. I slipped out of bed. Of course he didn’t stay until the morning. Romero was cautious, one of us had to be. If one of my sisters walked in without knocking, which had happened before, then we could have been in huge trouble. Still it felt like a small rejection that he had left me alone without a word.
Get a grip, Lily.
We had to be careful or I’d be sent home and then we wouldn’t get to spend any time at all together. This was a good beginning.
A beginning for what? I wasn’t that naïve to believe that my father would accept Romero as a potential candidate for marriage. I wasn’t even sure if Romero considered me as someone he’d want to marry. But I was getting ahead of myself. I wanted to take risks, enjoy life and be happy. This night with Romero was a step in the right direction.
I rushed through my shower but took extra care with my make-up and hair. Then I headed downstairs. I could hear my sisters already laughing in the kitchen and followed the sound. They stood at the kitchen counter, coffee cups in their hands. Nobody else was there but the big wooden table was set for six people, so the men would hopefully join us later. Trying to hide my disappointment that Romero wasn’t there yet, I walked toward them. Aria poured me a cup of coffee and handed it to me with a worried look. “Didn’t you sleep again last night?”