Anastasia gripped my upper arms, nails digging into my skin, and pushed me a few inches away before she leaned just close enough so nobody would hear her words. “I don’t want to run away,” she whispered, then loudly. “I couldn’t be happier.” She gave her best Grace Kelly smile into the round of gathered guests, looking like this was the moment of her life.
I stared, unable to comprehend what was going on. Was Anastasia putting up a show? Was she worried about someone overhearing them?
But when I stepped back to allow the next people in line to congratulate Anastasia and Cosimo, I allowed myself a closer look at Trish. She wasn’t putting up an Academy Award worthy performance. There weren’t the telltale signs of lines around her eyes when she was forcing a smile. This was real. Growl started to lead me away, but I kept glancing back at my former friend and my former fiancé. They looked happy. Nobody had forced Anastasia. She really wanted to marry him.
Nobody could help falling in love, right? If Anastasia had told me, I would have tried to convince my father of letting her marry him. I would have wanted Anastasia to be happy, and I’d never even cared about my fiancé.
How could Anastasia have let this happen? How long had this been going on? But even now, I didn’t want to believe that she had known before the party. Maybe she had found out afterward, when it was too late. I allowed myself one last glance at Anastasia before I turned away. She didn’t want anything to do with me tonight, and I suspected that wasn’t just because other people were around. She had a perfect future ahead of her, the one she’d always wanted. She wouldn’t risk it for me.
I emptied my glass and put it on a tray a server was carrying past. Suddenly I felt tired, and not just from alcohol. This evening was like a nightmare I would never wake out off.
Growl stopped in a corner of the room and leaned against the wall. I glanced up at him. He seemed to be done with this party too.
“Can’t we just leave?” I asked.
Growl shook his head. “Do you really want to show them how much this is bothering you? Show them your strength. Don’t cower.”
“I’m not cowering,” I hissed, then sighed. “But I feel drained. I’m not strong. I don’t care if they think I’m weak.” It wasn’t true and I’d later regret my lack of control, but right now I just wanted to escape.
“Never show those people weakness,” Growl said in a low voice, leaning down until we were very close. “You are stronger than you think. No woman has ever given me such a hard time like you do every day. If you can act strong around me, you can be strong around those weaklings. They are nothing.”
I blinked up at his amber eyes. For the first time I actually considered grabbing his face and kissing him. I wanted to do it in front of everyone. And that, too, scared me. I nodded instead. “You are right.” I lowered my eyes, unable to stand his closeness any longer. I caught a few people watching us with open mouths. Apparently they were waiting eagerly for a scene between Growl and me. They’d probably be horribly disappointed if this evening didn’t end with me being beaten to a bloody mess by Growl.
I glared at them and they actually looked away.
“That look is good. Show them who you are.”
“If I only knew,” I whispered. Across the room I suddenly spotted Trish and relief flooded me. Trish had always been the kinder of my two best friends. Growl followed my gaze. “Go ahead and talk to her. She’s your friend, right?”
“How do you know?”
“I saw you at Falcone’s party together.”
“Ok,” I said distractedly, already thinking of how best to go about talking to Trish. I couldn’t risk scaring her away.
“And don’t do anything stupid,” Growl said when I was already a few steps away.
“I won’t.”
I hurried past people who openly stared and pointed at me, who whispered my name like a curse, and even laughed at me, but I ignored them.
All that mattered was talking to Trish and find out as much as I could.
Trish spotted me when I was still a good distance away and for a moment I was sure she’d turn around and run, but she squared her shoulders and waited for me. I was grateful for that small act of bravery on her part, especially considering the many eyes that followed my every move. When I arrived in front of her, we both didn’t do anything for a few heartbeats. Then Trish awkwardly patted my arm and I stiffened under the forced gesture. Any hope I’d had left for my friendship with Trish vanished then too.