Fragile Longing

I waited until Sofia was out of sight before I followed her. I didn’t want to make Samuel suspicious. Of course, he narrowed his eyes at me in distrust when I appeared on the lower deck. Sofia was already back in the water and talking to Anna. I could imagine who they’d be talking about. Another reason for me to be wary. Maybe Sofia trusted Anna not to blabber to Dante or Valentina, but I didn’t want to take the risk. Dante hadn’t been my biggest fan since I’d challenged his decisions in the months after Serafina’s escape with Remo.

“Took you two awfully long to return,” Samuel said, climbing out of the lake. He stopped close in front of me. “What the fuck happened up there?” he asked in a low voice.

“Nothing,” I said with a hard smile. What happened between Sofia and me wasn’t his business. He was too pushy.

“I doubt you’d be happy if I went off into the dark woods with your sister.”

I leaned forward. “So far, you hardly notice her existence, so anything else would be a fucking improvement, Mione.”

His lips curled. “Stay away from Sofia until the wedding. Our family doesn’t need another pregnancy out of wedlock.”

“You don’t seem to have much faith in your sister.”

His eyes flashed with rage, but he didn’t say anything.

I doubted Sofia would have gone further than kissing. She sought my closeness, but she wouldn’t risk more. Yet, I understood Samuel. He’d put all his trust in his twin and she’d thrown it in his face.

“Maybe we should have another talk when we’ve calmed down,” I said eventually. I didn’t want a war between Samuel and me, especially because Emma’s well-being would soon be in his hands.

“Tomorrow morning. I want to work out at the lake. You can join me at sunrise.”

I nodded my consent, then with a last glance at Sofia, who was watching me and her brother, I went back to the lodge.I couldn’t sleep, tossing and turning all night long. I still cringed when I thought of how Danilo had reacted to me flashing my boobs at him. Why had I thought it would be a good idea? I’d tried to act like Anna, or how I thought Anna might act, but I obviously hadn’t pulled it off with the necessary confidence.

I was such an idiot, thinking Danilo would swoon because he saw me topless. He wasn’t a teenager. He was a grown man and had seen enough breasts in his life.

Sighing, I sat up, staring into the dark of the room. The nights out here in the woods were darker than in the city, and with it being a new moon hardly any light came through the windows, but the hints of gray lit up the sky. It wouldn’t be long until sunrise.

Eventually, I slipped out of my bed. There was no way I’d fall asleep again anyway. I opened my window wide, inhaling the crisp early morning air. Outside, the birds were waking up, their morning song soothing in its own way. I leaned against the window ledge and enjoyed the view over the tree-lined lake. From this vantage point, it looked like a huge mirror, still except for a few gentle ripples where fish burst through the surface. The sun rose behind the tree line, turning the horizon gray rather than yellow and orange. Footsteps crunched outside. I peered out of the window, searching for the source of the sounds. Samuel wouldn’t leave without saying goodbye, and I doubted Danilo would, either—at least not without saying goodbye to his sister.

Samuel and Danilo came into view, dressed in gym shorts and tight t-shirts. I hid behind the curtains so they wouldn’t detect me, but I still got a good look at them. They talked for a couple of minutes before they started jogging and disappeared in the forest. I took a shower and dressed in another beautiful halter summer dress. When I emerged from the bathroom, Danilo and Samuel were back from their run and were working out on the lower deck by the lake.

For a few minutes, I watched them doing push-ups and crunches before I decided to stop the stalking and head downstairs. The house was quiet, except for the chirping of the birds that drifted through the open windows. I made myself a black tea, a Darjeeling, my favorite—with milk and sugar naturally. The terrace door was ajar, letting the morning air in. It was cool and crisp. I tiptoed closer to the terrace door, peering outside. I couldn’t see much from my position, so I crept out onto the patio with my teacup. Danilo and Samuel were still busy with their workout. I curled up in the lounge shell, even though I couldn’t see them.

I sipped at my tea and read the messages I’d gotten from friends at school as well as Mom. Soon, I heard them coming closer.