I don’t want to leave this cocoon of happiness he’s surrounded me in. Wasn’t it just a couple hours ago when I was sitting in my car, super bitter that he’d ruined my night of getting my fix of this? I almost laugh, thinking about how nothing any of the Doms at the club could have done would’ve held a candle to what I feel right now. I bet this high will last far longer than a week. But at the same time, I don’t think I want to wait even that long to get my next dose of Nate Black.
I see him tilt my head back and look deep into my eyes, but I can’t hear what he’s saying. I’m not in there, my consciousness still floating just above us. Yet I take notice when his face starts to look worried. I see myself blink at him, a smile curling just the corners of my lips, but that does little to soothe his furrowed brow and the way his biceps are starting to bunch as he holds me tighter.
I sigh, knowing I should go back, knowing I should soothe him, since he’s never experienced this before. I should tell him how proud I am to have been his first sub, how amazing it is that his instincts told him exactly what to do concerning aftercare, since I hadn’t really explained thoroughly how to do it after I told him what it was.
With one last moment hovering above our bodies, I take a mental snapshot to keep inside my mind and heart forever, and I know this image will be the one I compare every experience moving forward to.
Back in my body, I blink several times and take a cleansing breath in then out, relaxing even further against Nathaniel’s expansive chest.
“Evie, please say something. Are you all—”
I purr against him. “Never better,” I whisper, wanting him to go back to the softly murmured words against my hair.
“Fuck, you scared me. I thought… I thought I’d been too rough and–”
“Shhh,” I soothe, not caring that I’m essentially shushing my Dom. But he needs the assurance. He needs to know he did nothing wrong. “Subspace.”
His biceps relax, and it makes me sink away from him a little as he peers down at me, surprise covering his face. “Subspace? I… I got you to subspace? Without even anything… special?” he asks, his eyes looking back and forth between mine, and I smile.
“But it was special, Mr. Black.” I try to lift my arm to boop him on the nose, but the limb is too heavy. “You’re special.”
He must see the sincerity in my eyes, because a boyish smile spreads across his face, making him look younger than what his very manly body was just capable of doing to me. “You’re special to me too, Evelyn,” he murmurs, and then he lifts me halfway to meet his lowering face, and he kisses me with such sweetness it does something funny to my heart.
Never have I felt anything I’ve ever done as a submissive in my heart before. The satisfaction it gives me is always felt in my gut… while it quiets my anxious mind… experiencing the pleasure throughout my body, and maybe a little in my soul, just knowing I’ve finally discovered who I am meant to be. But I’ve never felt any of it in my heart before. Not until this man holding me looked into my eyes and asked for my help. Not until he told me to my face that he thought I was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. And not until this man kissed me like his life depended on it.
Suddenly, I’m moving, and Nathaniel standing up with me still cradled in his arms brings me out of my thoughts. I give in to it, enjoying not having to use any brainpower, continuing to submit myself to his whims as he does with me what he pleases.
“Let’s get cleaned up, shall we?” he murmurs as he enters the bathroom and flips on the light. He’s not asking me, not forcing me to make a decision. He’s just talking out loud in that deliciously deep voice of his, and I nuzzle against him. He sits on the side of my huge tub, the first upgrade I ever made to my house, since the one that was in here when I bought the place was tiny and rusted. This one is a giant garden tub with jets, and he perches me on his lap, one arm still around me as he uses the other to turn on the faucet and get the temperature to his liking.
While the tub fills, he just holds me, rubbing his big calloused hand up and down my naked back, lulling me deeper into my tranquil state. I feel boneless, more relaxed than I’ve ever felt in my life, and the only thing I’m super aware of is how wonderful his cologne smells where my face is buried in his neck.