Violet tries to close the door in my face. I use my shoulder and my foot to keep it open.
“Really?” Violet gives me a look of resentment as she drops her shoulders. “You really don’t know how to take no for an answer, do you?”
“I’m not going away until we talk,” I tell her. “Or would you rather have this conversation at work?”
She puts her hands on her hips. “So, what did your brothers think about that, huh? I bet you got scolded.”
“I don’t care about them. I care about you. That’s why I’m here.”
“Oh, really? You care about me?” She points her fingers at her chest, then waves her hands. “Don’t worry. I can handle your brothers.”
“I said they’re not why I’m here.”
“Why are you here, then, Asher?” Her hands go back to her hips. “Because you weren’t able to have your fun earlier? Because you can’t get enough of fucking me?”
I frown. “That’s not what I said.”
“What exactly can’t you get enough of, then?” She crosses her arms beneath her breasts. “Go on. Tell me.”
“You,” I tell her. “All of you.”
Her eyebrows go up. “All of me? Really?”
I pinch the bridge of my nose as I try to get a hold of my temper. Why is Violet being so difficult?
I inhale then exhale. “Violet…”
“Why don’t you just admit it, Asher? That all you want from me is sex?”
My temper slips. I shake my head.
“You know what? If you don’t want to believe me, there’s nothing I can do. If you want to make fun of me, fine. But I’m not going to put up with any of this.”
I step back.
Violet snorts. “Oh, now you’re leaving?”
I meet her gaze. “I thought you wanted me to leave.”
“I thought you wanted to talk.”
“I did, but you’re clearly not in the mood. All you want to do is pick a fight.”
“Really?” Violet steps forward. “So I’m the bad guy here, am I? I’m the crazy bitch?”
I shrug. “You did stick your knee into my balls.”
She shakes her head. “Unbelievable.”
For once, we agree. This whole conversation, if it can even be called one, is ridiculous.
I walk away.
“That’s right, Asher Hawthorne,” Violet tells me. “Leave. That’s what you’re good at, right? You leave your date at a party so she doesn’t have a ride home.”
I stop in my tracks and roll my eyes. I guess she’ll never forgive me for that.
“And then you leave the women you sleep with behind on the bed right after you get your pants back on. And you never look back. You just throw them away and forget they ever existed.”
I turn around. “But I didn’t do that to you, did I?”
Violet doesn’t answer.
“You know I didn’t, but it doesn’t mean anything to you.”
“I don’t know what it means,” she says. “Tell me what it means, Asher. That’s all I’m asking.”
“No. That’s not all you’re asking. You want me to give you a ring.”
“I never said that.”
“You want me to say I’m in love with you and I can’t live without you. Isn’t that right?”
Violet purses her lips and says nothing. She doesn’t have to. I know I’m right. I also know I can’t say those words. Not yet.
I shake my head. “Even if I say those words, you’re not going to believe me anyway, are you?”
Violet meets my gaze. There isn’t any trace of anger in her eyes now. Just pain.
A lump forms in my throat. What? Is she going to cry again? But I have a feeling that this time, she isn’t going to let me comfort her.
“That’s the thing with faith, Asher,” she says in a breaking voice. “It has to be earned. And no, you haven’t earned it.”
So that’s what this all comes to? That’s her decision? That she doesn’t want to have anything to do with me anymore? Then I guess I have no choice but to respect it.
I nod. “Fine. Just remember that I’m not the one who threw what we had away.”
I turn away, but instead of going to my apartment, I walk past Violet to the elevator. I’m not staying here tonight, maybe not for a while. She can cry all she wants. She can break all the stuff in her apartment, but I don’t want to hear any of it. I don’t want to know.
If she wants nothing to do with me, then this time, for once, I’m going to leave her alone.Chapter Twenty-TwoViolet
I close the door behind me and lean on it.
For a moment, I just stay there. I don’t have the strength to move. My mind, which has been filled with all sorts of chaotic notions, suddenly feels empty. My body feels numb. My heart feels like it’s no longer in my chest, like it’s been shattered into a million pieces and those fragments have started to evaporate one by one.