“I hope you’re right.”
“Are you sure this is what you want, Autumn? I mean, I know this isn’t what you had planned when you escaped your clan.”
“No, it isn’t. It’s even better. I was so scared. I had no idea where I was going or what I was going to do when I got there. Then, you showed up, and I forgot all about anything else but being with you. I think this is how fate works.”
“I think so too, but just in case you need me to say it, I know you are capable of so much more than just being the mother of a bunch of wolf-bear babies. Once we are through all this pregnancy stuff, I want you to pursue whatever it is you imagined yourself doing as an adult.”
“I don’t know what that is. I was still young when my father promised me to Trevor, so I only thought I’d ever be the Alpha’s wife. I never stopped to consider I could be something else.”
“Well, stop to consider it now. You’ll figure it out. There are a lot of women in this pack that are just like the ones in your clan. They don’t envision themselves as anything more than just the wives that support their shifter husbands. I want you to be what you want.”
“I’m sure I’ll figure it out. Who knows. Maybe a wife and mother are all I was intended to be.”
“Maybe, but I doubt it. You are a strong woman and capable of so much more than just rearing children and cooking dinner.”
Rather than answering, she rose up onto her tiptoes and kissed him on the lips. The days to come would reveal whether the people in this clan chose to accept or reject her. He was hoping they would see what a beautiful person she was, but you just never knew how they would perceive an outsider. No doubt they were already whispering about who she might be, but he had purposely kept her away from them, as he knew they would smell her the instant she was in their midst.
“Foster doesn’t have a problem with us, so we just have to win over the pack now.”
“Oh, piece of cake,” she said sarcastically.
“All that matters is that we are going to be okay. I may never be Alpha, but I’m cool with that. I found something so much better. I love you, Autumn.”
“I love you too, Malcolm.”
For the first time in a while, it seemed like things might finally be okay. It was like the song said. You don’t always get what you want, but sometimes, you get what you need. This was definitely what he had needed.CHAPTER THIRTY-ONEAutumn-13
“It all looks good,” the doctor said a few days later when Autumn made it into this office for a checkup.
“That’s good to hear. Can you tell what it is?”
“I wish I could, but they are jumbled up in there so tight that it’s hard to say for sure.”
“They?”
“I take it this is your first ultrasound?”
“Yes,” Autumn replied.
“I’d say there are at least six, but it’s hard to tell with all the tangled arms and legs and stacked heartbeats.”
“Can you tell what they are at all?”
“You mean the sex?”
“No. I mean, are they bears or wolves?’
“I wish I could say, but it’s just too hard to tell right now. They are pretty packed in there. You’ll know in another month or so. I’d be prepared for a decent size litter, though.”
“Thanks,” Autumn said, finding no comfort in his words. Despite Malcolm telling her what Foster had said and knowing he didn’t care what they had or how many, she still felt out of sorts about all of this. It felt like she was in limbo, but she suspected that was how a lot of new mothers felt.
The two of them left the doctor, hand in hand. Though Malcolm had told her repeatedly that he didn’t care about being the Alpha, she wasn’t sure that she could accept that. She felt like she had come along and ruined the plans he had for achieving his goals, and it wasn’t a nice feeling. It didn’t matter how many times he told her differently. It was just something she would probably always wonder if he really meant.
“Well, it looks like we are going to have a houseful soon,” he told her as they drove back home.
“Sounds like.”
“I wish we could plan better, but all we can do is hope for the best. I can get more cribs in once you’ve given birth if I need to do that. The pack keeps a storage room of them for such an occasion. I just hope there are still plenty when you give birth. With the push to get the pack numbers up, it’s possible that many of them might already be claimed.”