Stepping on the deck, I glanced up at the house on the bluff. It had remained dark long after I came back, but now I could see the bright light on the top floor. Zachary was back home and in his studio, no doubt losing himself in his work. I wondered if he was still upset, or if our argument would be locked away in a corner of his mind, practically forgotten. If it was the latter, I wouldn’t even enter his thoughts again until he emerged from his studio; if I entered them then. I had no idea what would happen. He was, I knew, capable of cutting off his feelings when he chose. Pain rippled in my chest as I thought about him choosing to cut me off for good.
Beside me, Dixie whined, wanting to go for a walk. She wasn’t happy when I snapped on her lead before we descended to the beach. I couldn’t risk her taking off in the direction of Zachary’s house. I purposely led her in the opposite direction, ignoring her gentle pulls to head toward the light on the bluff. “Not tonight, girl,” I whispered, patting her on the head. “We’re on our own.”
I swallowed the lump in my throat as I wondered if we would be on our own from now on. In my need to help Zachary, to reach out and show him how much I cared, I might have, in fact, pushed him away. Tears stung my eyes as I realized I wasn’t sure if he would return to me.
I tossed and turned in my bed. Twice I got up and looked toward the house. Zachary’s light burned all night. Sleep only came in small spurts; the next morning I was groggy and desperate for coffee. With a groan, I realized my cream was in Zachary’s refrigerator and I would have to drink it black, as well as go into town and get some supplies. As predicted the skies were heavy, a dull gray blanket covering the world, so I decided to go in early and get my errands done before the rain came.
My phone rang with Karen’s ringtone and I grabbed it off the counter, sitting on the sofa as I answered.
“Hi.”
“Hey, stranger. How are you?”
“Good. You?”
“I’m fine. Everything okay there for you? You haven’t called in a few days and your texts were rather short.”
My eyes drifted to the window and the dark sky. “Um, yeah. Just been busy.”
“Are you writing?”
“Trying.”
Karen’s voice sounded worried. “Megan, are you okay? You sound strange. Is Dixie okay?”
I cleared my throat, tugging on my ear in worry. How could I tell her what was happening? I had no idea how she’d react if I told her all that had happened since I arrived. I chose the easier route and fibbed a little. “Yeah, she’s fine. I’m just fighting another headache. The weather’s been quite bad. You know how it affects me.”
“I know. Here as well—such strange weather for this time of year. Don’t you have your meds?”
“No, I forgot them.”
“Why don’t you talk to the pharmacist in town and maybe they can contact your home pharmacy and do a refill for you?”
“That’s a good idea. I’ll go in today. I need cream anyway.”
“Megan, are you sure you’re okay?”
“I’m fine. Really.”
“Do you need anything?”
I drew in a shaky breath. I needed Zachary. “No,” I whispered. “Really, I’m okay. I’ll call in a couple days once the weather breaks and I feel better.”
“Promise?”
“Yes.”
“If you don’t, I’ll come there and check on you. You know I will.”
I smiled at her bossiness. She was a good friend and I knew she was worried. I cleared my throat. “I will. I’ll get some pills, so I can sleep and feel better. I’ll call you in a couple of days.”
“Okay.”
I hung up and walked over to the window again, leaning my forehead to the cool glass. My breath caught when I spied Zachary on the beach, standing with his back to me, as Elliott ran around. Moments passed while I stared, transfixed, at his distant figure, the long overcoat billowing out behind him. I reached for the glass door, yearning to go to him and beg him to talk to me. I wanted to wind my arms around him and feel his coat wrapping me close to his warmth. I longed to hear his steady heartbeat under my ear as he held me to him, nuzzling my hair with his lips. A tear ran down my cheek as I thought about what his low voice would sound like as he whispered he had missed me, that everything would be okay now, and he wasn’t letting me go.
None of that happened, though. Without so much as a backward glance, he whistled for Elliott and together they disappeared from sight.