“No, you did the right thing. I’m on my way. Don’t let her leave, Tami. I’ll handle all the arrangements.”
I hung up, dropping my phone, the sound of it hitting the table, a dull thud breaking the roar in my head. I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up into Graham’s concerned face.
“Richard, I’m sorry.”
“I have to . . .” My voice trailed off.
“Let me drive you.”
I felt odd. Off balance. My mind was chaotic, my stomach in knots, and my eyes burned. One thought clarified, her name burning in my brain. “Katharine.”
“She needs you. I’ll take you to her.”
I nodded. “Yes.”At the home, I didn’t hesitate, rushing through the hallways. I saw Tami outside Penny’s room, the door closed.
“Is she in there?”
“Yes.”
“What do you need?”
“I need to know if there was anything arranged, pre-planning, what her wishes were for when she passed?”
“I know she wanted to be cremated. I don’t think Katharine had made any pre-arrangements.” I ran my hand over the back of my neck. “I have no experience with this, Tami.”
Graham’s voice came from behind me. “Let me help, Richard.”
I turned in surprise. I thought he had dropped me off and left.
He extended his hand to Tami, introducing himself. She smiled in acknowledgement. He turned back to me.
“Go to your wife. I have a good friend who has a string of funeral homes. I’ll contact him and start things for you—Tami can advise me.”
She nodded. “Of course.” She laid her hand on my arm. “When you’re ready, I’ll get Joey and take him to the lounge. He is staying here with us.”
“All right.”
“I’ll help Mr. Gavin as best I can.”
“I’d appreciate it—so will Katy.”
Graham smiled. “So rarely you call her that. Go—she needs you.”
I slipped into the room, quietly pushing the door shut. The room seemed so wrong. There was no music, no Penny sitting at one of her canvasses, humming away. Even Joey was silent, huddled on his perch, his head buried in his wing. The curtains were drawn, the room dimmed in sadness.
Katharine was a huddled figure sitting beside Penny’s bed, holding her hand. I moved beside her, allowing myself a moment to gaze down at the woman who had changed my life. Penny looked as if she was asleep, her face peaceful. She would no longer be confused or agitated, no longer searching for something she couldn’t remember.
No longer able to tell me stories of the woman who was now grieving for her.
I lowered myself beside my wife, covering the hand clutching Penny’s with mine. “Katharine,” I murmured.
She didn’t move. She remained frozen, her face blank, not speaking.
I slid my arm around her stiff shoulders, bringing her close. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I know how much you loved her.”
“I just left,” she whispered. “I was halfway home, and they called. I shouldn’t have left.”
“You didn’t know.”
“She said she was tired and wanted to rest. She didn’t want to paint. She asked me to turn off the music. I should have known something was wrong,” she insisted.
“Don’t do this to yourself.”
“I should have been with her when she—”
“You were with her. You know how she felt about this, sweetheart. She said it all the time—when she was ready, she was going. You were here, the person she loved the most—the person she would want to be the last one she saw, and she was ready.” I ran my hand over her hair. “She’s been ready for a while, baby. I think she was waiting to make sure you were going to be okay.”
“I didn’t say goodbye.”
I tugged her head to my shoulder. “Did you kiss her?”
“Yes.”
“Did she tweak your nose?”
“Yes.”
“Then you said goodbye. That’s how you two did it. You didn’t need words, any more than you had to tell her you loved her. She knew, sweetheart. She always knew.”
“I don’t . . . I don’t know what to do now.”
Her entire body shuddered, and unable to take her intensifying pain, I stood, lifted her, sitting back down before she could protest. She still clutched Penny’s hand, and I could feel her trembling.
“Let me help, sweetheart. Graham is here, too. We’ll figure out what we need to do.”
Her head fell to my chest, and I felt the wet of her tears. I pressed a kiss to her head, holding her until I felt her body relax and she released Penny’s hand, gently letting it rest on the quilt. We sat in silence as I stroked my hand up and down her back.
There was a knock at the door, and I called out for them to enter. Graham came in, crouching beside us.
“Katy, dear girl, I am so sorry.”
Her voice was a mere whisper. “Thank you.”
“Laura is here. We would like to help you and Richard with the arrangements, if you are willing.”
She nodded, another shiver running down her spine.