It turns me on, so fucking badly, watching her touch herself like this. I don’t want to scare her, and any movement I make might interrupt her, but damn, my cock is hard watching her. She looks so beautiful with her eyes closed and her mouth barely parted, whimpering as she comes.
Finally, her hand stills and when she moves her hands out from under the blanket, they pick the book back up, sighing as she catches her breath.
Only then do I step in through the door, clearing my throat, loving that my little virgin is so filthy and able to pleasure herself whenever she so desires.
“Afternoon, Bella.”
“Oh, hi...” She fumbles with the book, flipping it right side up. Her cheeks are bright red, but I don’t mind. It’s cute to see her so flustered.
I raise an eye at the bare-chested man on the cover, already knowing the answer to my question. “You like romance?”
She bites back a smile. “I like the idea of getting swept off my feet.”
I nod, stepping toward her. “Can we talk?”
She sets the book aside and adjusts in the chair as I sit opposite her.
“I’m surprised you want to speak with me at all,” She bites her nail, not meeting my gaze.
“Look at me, Bella.”
She shakes her head.
“Please?”
She covers her face with her hand, refusing to meet my gaze.
“Listen,” I try. “We all make mistakes.”
“This wasn’t a mistake,” she says to her lap. “I don’t know why you’d even care about me after I ran like I did in the storm, acting so foolishly.”
“You thought I screwed over your father and you care about him, Bella, and how he might feel.”
She finally drops her hands and looks up at me. “But what about how you might feel, Ronan?” She blinks back tears. “I never considered that.”
“But now?” I ask, needing to know the truth. “Do you care how I might feel now?”
She nods. “I care. So much.” Then a tear spills across her cheek and it kills me to watch her in pain.
I reach for her tender hand, pulling her to my lap. “Shh, Bella, it’s alright.”
“Is it?” She cries into my shoulder. “I know you’re in pain, and I’m not just meaning your wounds from the wolves. I know you lost your mother. I figured it out, though it is obvious in a thousand ways. The library books and the delicate tea set and the stained-glass windows. Her touch is everywhere in this home. It’s beautiful.”
I stiffen—the memories still so raw— but with her in my arms, it’s impossible to stay ridged.
She makes me soft in all the right ways and hard in all the others.
“I did lose her. That’s why I moved here. She loved this house and left it to me, though I don’t deserve it.”
Bella cups my cheek in her small palm. “Why is that, Ronan?”
“Because she was dying, and I didn’t come see her in time. She died, and I was off in France, not at her bedside. My priorities...” I run a hand through my hair, ashamed of the man I’ve been. “My priorities were fucked up, and I never got to tell her how much I loved her.”
“She must have known, Ronan.”
I smirk, not believing her. “Why do you think that?”
“Because she left you this house. This gorgeous home that has her fingerprints all over it. She could have given it to her husband, but she gave it to you. She wanted you with her, even in death.”
“Does it work like that, you think? That my wrongs can be made right with simple words? By forgiving myself?”
“I think it works however you like, but beating yourself up for a past mistake isn’t going to help you move on. Forget the past. What sort of man do you want to be now?”
“Yesterday you called me a beast. Maybe I’m not a man at all.”
A flicker of a smile crosses her face. “Maybe you’re not. But you know, being a beast isn’t the worst thing in the world.”
“No?”
She shakes her head. “In fact, you are a beast, wild and untamed, and it makes you very appealing, if I do say so myself.”
“That’s not who I am, though, entirely,” I tell her, shaking my head.
“What do you mean?”
“You have tamed me, Bella.”
“Truly?” She looks at me with so much wonder, so much sincerity, it hurts. I could never lie to this woman and I would never want to.
“Heart and soul.”
“What is left then, to keep you as a beast? Surely something?” she asks with the most tender smile I’ve ever seen.
My smile is no longer tender. It is hungry.
I pull her closer, so she can straddle me properly. So, my rock-hard cock can grind against her cunt.
“You’re right, Bella. In the bedroom, my beauty, that is where I ravish my prey.”
“But we aren’t in the bedroom, beast. We’re in the library.”