More Than Me

“Do we have to go? Why can’t we stay here, get naked and...?” His hand covered my mouth, as his chest deflated.

“Corazon, please. I have been heading up this charity event for the past five years and it is imperative I show up to greet the donors and give the speech. Trust me, I want to strip you right here and now and plant my face in your pussy, but duty calls.”

“Then let’s go and get back so you can make me scream your name.” I stand on my tiptoes and kiss him before heading out the door. I could feel myself fidgeting and my nerves building as we got closer to the hotel where the event was being held, but I refused to make a big deal of it. Immediately upon entering the ballroom, Hector was greeted and treated as royalty. He never took his hands off me. Introduced me to everyone as his fiancée. The first time he said it, I was sipping champagne and almost choked. The night was going well. I learned a lot about him including how he donates a million dollars every year to breast cancer research. He throws this fundraiser every year to raise money for veterans dealing with PTSD and have nowhere to stay. It’s fair to say I fell more in love with him.

Deciding I needed a break to go to the ladies’ room, I leaned over as he was talking to the patron and told him so. “Of course, Corazon. Let me escort you.” he makes to follow me, but I stop him.

“No, babe. Stay and talk. I can make it there on my own.” His eyebrows went up as he gave me the ‘yea, that’s not going to happen’ look. “Hector, I will be fine. I promise.” I kissed his cheek before walking away. It was when I was finishing in the ladies’ room that everything, I thought about my relationship with Hector changed. I had just flushed the toilet when these women walked in.

“Did you see Hector tonight?” the first one said.

“Girl, yes. He looks so sexy in all white.” the second one responds.

“I know right. I have been dying to get my hands on that Spanish stallion. Can you imagine the horse rod he is hiding in his pants?”

“Right. And what’s with that piece of trash he brought with him? Did you hear him introducing her as his fiancée? What could she possibly have to offer him?” My stomach drops as every high school experience comes barreling toward me at once. “I mean, did you see her hair? Who did her makeup? A kindergartner?” she laughs, her voice evil and filled with contempt.

“He must be desperate. A man like him needs a woman with connections. A woman who can handle his lifestyle. His...world. She looks so out of place here, it's almost pathetic.”

“Oh trust, after this, he won’t be able to ignore how wrong for him she is.”

“Good. Then I can make my move. Are you ready to get back?”

“Yea. How does my makeup look?”

“Perfect.” they exit the bathroom and I exit my dream of having found my forever. Ever since then, I have been avoiding answering his marriage proposal. But I can’t bring myself to stay away from him. My heart couldn’t handle it. But the truth is, my life is a bit more complicated anyway.

When I was younger, my parents were, the ones everyone in the neighborhood looked up to. They were sweet, kind, helpful and anyone who knew them, knew how much they loved each other. Over time however, my mom began to change. Nothing major at first. Just subtle things. Like a curse word here or there, or a sudden flip out and then she would be back to normal. We were concerned and my dad took her to a lot of hospitals before one diagnosed her with bipolar. They said we should prepare ourselves for life to change. They were not kidding.

She would go from being happy to pissed and downright violent in a matter of seconds. My grandparents wanted my dad to admit her to an institution, but my dad, the loyal man he was, wouldn’t hear of it. So, we learned to cope. We made sure she took her medicine, put away sharp objects and continued to try to have a life. Well, until a year ago when my father died of a heart attack. Talk about overwhelmed. I don’t think I even properly grieved for him. No. I was so busy trying to keep my mom from going off the deep end with my dad gone that my life became.... a sad, chaotic, hopeless mess. If it weren't for AvaLynn, I don't know where I would be. She is the best friend any girl could ask for. She used to come to my house and stay the night on the nights I went home, so I didn’t have to be in the house with my mom alone. Sometimes she would bring me dinner and just sit as I cried, wondering how this became my life when I had so many goals and plans. Telling me the whole time that I would get through this and she will always be here for me.