It was too close, too much like a married couple since there was only a thin door separating the two rooms. “Calen, this is the best solution, don’t you think?” Rebecca carried on as if he hadn’t interrupted her. “Right now, my grandson’s needs and his best interests are the only things that matter. We, adults, are just going to have to compromise. Isn’t that right cupcake?” She walked over to the baby and squeezed his cheek playfully, and my heart twisted when my son chortled and reached out for his grandma.
I never thought he’d have this. My own mother wouldn’t get near him, not that I’d let her, and I see now how my plans to keep him and I sequestered from the world wasn’t good for him. I’d started taking him outside, sure, but my plan was to keep him at home with me as much as possible for fear of what mom might do somewhere along the way.
Now seeing how lively and happy he was with two complete strangers made me see the error of my ways. My son was starving for affection, pretty much the same way I had been after my dad died. The realization made me feel awful. It felt like I was as much of an abuser as my mother had been to me.
My ears started buzzing, and I was sure that I was going to pass out any second from the wave of nausea that overcame me. I closed my eyes and opened them again just as quickly only to find Calen watching me.* * *CALEN* * *What game is she playing now? She’s putting it on kind of thick since mom came up with her nonsensical idea. It didn’t cross my mind to let her stay. I had planned to let her feed my son his last meal of the day later on this evening, and then kick her out. She could come back in the morning to feed him and take her ass somewhere for the next few hours until he grew hungry again.
It’s not like he was just on the tit; he was already eating solids as well. Maybe it was time to wean him. I’ll be sure to check with the pediatrician I have lined up. The sooner I get her out of our lives, the better. Now, mom had gone and thrown sand in my eye with her suggestion.
There was no point in arguing with her, I’m sure, and she did have a point, right now our only focus should be my son and what’s best for him. “Oh dear, is the pantry stocked? I know how much you hate eating at home alone, Calen, so I’m sure it isn’t. Better have Betsy go to the store, or should we have it delivered?” She didn’t wait for an answer, just continued steamrolling right over me.
“Yes, that sounds best. Come on, Giselle, you’d know better than I what foods you like for the baby. Calen, we’ll be using the computer in your office. Come along, dear, dinner will be here before you know it, and since you’re going to be staying here, you need to stock up as well. You’re still nursing, aren’t you?”
“That’s one of the things I regret not doing for Calen when he was born. Back then, breastfeeding wasn’t as prevalent as it is these days, not in our circles anyway. Now it’s all the rage. Maybe if I’d done that, he’d have more sense, what do you think?” That’s my mother, way to take my side. “Thanks, mom.” I ignored the two of them and left the room in the opposite direction to show my son the gardens and explain to him the play area I was going to have erected for him out there.
I refuse to think about the relief I feel at mom’s suggestion. I can roll with the punches, and now that I think about it, having Giselle’s disloyal ass near is maybe a good thing. Who knows what the hell schemes and plots she’d come up with when I’m not looking. No, this way is better; this way I can keep an eye on her, make sure she doesn’t pull another runner.
Not that I care. As long as she doesn’t take my son anywhere, she can walk her ass off the face of the earth for all I care. These up and down moods are going to play hell with my equilibrium. Better deal with her one way or the other before I make myself crazy.GiselleI feel like I’ve just been run over by a freight train. One minute I was evading Calen’s nasty glares, and the next, I was sitting beside his mom at the huge mahogany desk in his home office slash study. My face heated as I recalled the numerous times Calen had taken me on this very desk, which seemed to be one of the only things he hadn’t gotten rid of when he changed everything else in the house.