I call Allecto.
Despite the relatively early hour, she answers quickly. “Do you need out?”
Guilt swarms. Of course she would assume that’s why I’m calling—that I’ve killed Malone and need an escape. “No, I’m fine.”
Allecto blows out a long breath. “You are hell on my blood pressure, you know that?”
“I’m sorry.” And I am. I never really thought I’d end up with a family of sorts in the Underworld, but that’s exactly what’s happened. Their presence in my life doesn’t negate what I lost, but I can’t deny that they have enriched my life and given me more love than I thought possible. Allecto will always be there when I need her, and as much as I need her right now, I really don’t relish the coming “I told you so” she’ll no doubt deliver. “I, uh, need some advice.”
“End the assignation early and come back to the Underworld today. There, see how easy that was?”
Against all reason, I laugh. “Shouldn’t you wait to hear the situation before you start offering advice?”
“No, because I know you. This ends one of two ways. Either you kill her and have to leave the city to avoid her people strapping you to a pyre and setting you on fire, or you can’t go through with it and you end up mired in misplaced guilt and bullshit self-loathing.” She softens her tone. “I know you’re grieving your mother, but this isn’t the way to do it, Aurora.”
I close my eyes. It would be so much easier if the only reason I was calling was to request an exit. She’s right; it’s the smartest course of action. But I’ve never been smart when it comes to Malone, and I only seem to get more foolish as time goes on. “I can handle this.”
“Is that why you’re on the phone with me right now? Because you’re handling it so well?
I glare at the ceiling. “She deserves to die.”
Allecto makes the jump with me without hesitation. “We’ve all done shit that could be argued we deserve to die for. You know my past isn’t free of sins. No one in the Underworld is—including you.”
“It was one tiny fire.”
“Aurora, the only reason that asshole isn’t dead is because his brother hauled him out a window. He still suffered two broken legs from the fall.”
I can’t help my satisfied smile. “Maybe he shouldn’t have fucked with Tink, then.” Not that she knew what I’d done. No one but Allecto did, and only because I needed her security clearance to get the relevant information on the man who’d tried to rough up Tink in one of the private rooms. He hadn’t gotten far before security stepped in, but Hades chose not to do anything beyond banish him from the neutral territory. That wasn’t enough of a punishment for me.
“My point,” Allecto continues, “is that Malone was perfectly within her rights as challenger to do what she did. It doesn’t make it less shitty, and it doesn’t make you less hurt by it, but no one in that territory sees things the way you do.”
“We’ve gone over this before.” My voice catches. “My mother is dead because of her.”
“Yes. And I’m sorry for that, but it doesn’t make a damn bit of sense to throw away your life for something that happened twenty years ago.” She pauses. “I know it doesn’t feel like twenty years ago, not with what happened last week, but that just confirms that you need to be here, with your people, not off on a reckless path of revenge.”
“If I wanted a lecture, I would have called Hades.”
“Great idea. Let’s loop Hades into this.” Her tone goes dangerous. “Hades who does not know about the decision you made regarding your mother.”
Guilt flares. “If he knew, he would have said no.”
“Yeah, he would have.” She huffs out a breath. “What happened? Obviously, something changed, or you wouldn’t be calling me right now.”
Now that I have her on the phone, I’m not sure I can verbalize it. It feels like too much a betrayal to my mother. I swallow hard. ”She’s not what I expected.”
“Considering you expected her to be a fire-breathing dragon, I’m not surprised.”
“I’ve read her file.”
“We all have. Stop stalling, and spit it out.”
“She’s just so human at times; not like a monster at all. It’s messing with my head.”
Allecto’s silent for a long time. Long enough that I have to bite my bottom lip to keep myself from babbling. Finally, she says, “It almost sounds as if you like her.”
“Don’t be absurd.”
“That’s not a no.”
“It’s also not a yes.”
She waits a beat. “That isn’t a no, either.”
I drag my hand over my face. “Liking her would be unforgivable. You know that. After everything she did, I need to hate her. I do hate her. She took everything from me, and she deserves to see consequences because of that.”