Chapter One
Dawn
I make my way toward Mark with Reagan’s words, “He assumes you’re his while you’re standing here wondering if he’s yours. Talk to him,” bouncing around in my head. Does he really already think I’m his? Sure, I want to be, but like I told her, we’ve never talked about it. I’m not even sure how we ended up where we are. We just kind of started hanging out with everyone as a group, and before we knew it, we were hanging out just the two of us. Hell, we didn’t even start sleeping together until a few months ago. Things are always easy and fun. I just assumed that’s what we were. A good time. Now, I’m not so sure. I know what I want. What my heart wants. But Mark is one of those guys. You know the type. The one that every woman is drawn to. He has that “bad boy” vibe with his tattoos adorning his arms and back. He’s not the type to stick with one woman. Then again, from what Kendall has told me, neither was Ridge or even Tyler for that matter. Now look at them.
Family men.
I can’t help but smile as I think about Mark and his group of friends. They’re the poster image for badassery, but when it comes to the women and now kids in their lives, they’re big softies. It’s endearing.
It’s sexy as hell.
I stop next to Mark, and he immediately slides his arm around my waist and pulls me close. “It’s hard to believe she’s already a year old,” I say, observing as Everly laughs at Knox. He’s dancing around being goofy, and she’s loving every minute of it.
“Right, and those two,”—he points to Tyler and Reagan’s twin boys—“they’re going to be next. Time is passing us by.” He laughs.
He’s right. Time is flying by, and as I stand here watching our friends and their kids, I know that’s what I want. I want kids of my own, and a husband. My gut twists because I don’t know if he does. I need to just ask him. After all, communication is key to every relationship. Right?
Before I can reply, Knox makes a beeline for us and wraps his arms around my legs. I lift him into my arms and settle him on my hip. He rests his head on my shoulder and my heart melts. This little guy is so full of love.
“What are you doing, birthday girl?” Mark smiles down at Everly, who pulls on his pants leg. He lifts her effortlessly and holds her in his arms. “I think you need to tell your daddy it’s time for cake,” he whispers, loud enough for me to hear. He winks at me then addresses Knox. “Look at you moving in on my girl.” He reaches out and tickles his belly, which causes Knox to wiggle in my arms.
“No.” He chuckles. Mark eases up and Knox wiggles to get down. He rushes across the room to his dad, who swings him in his arms upside down, pulling a deep belly laugh from him before settling him on his hip.
“Are you tired, sweetie?” I ask Everly. Reaching over, I push her brown locks out of her eyes.
“I think we better get to the cake and presents before this little one passes out,” Kendall says, appearing beside us. At the sound of her mom’s voice, her eyes open a little wider and she turns toward the sound. She immediately holds her arms out for Kendall, who takes her from Mark after he kisses her on the cheek and whispers another “Happy Birthday” to her.
By the time Everly opens her gifts and smashes a handful of cake in her face as we sing “Happy Birthday,” she’s done. It’s not just her. All the kids seem to be cranky and ready for a nap. When Everly rubs her eyes and gets cake in them, she starts to cry. Daddy to the rescue. Ridge scoops her up and cradles her in his arms.
“You ready to head out?” Mark asks, his voice low and only for me. All the kids are exhausted, and I’m sure Ridge and Kendall are ready to have their house to themselves.
“Yeah. We heading to my place?”
“Thought we could go to mine.” He playfully wags his eyebrows and it’s such a contrast from his usual intense stare. That’s something I’ve noticed he saves for those closest to him.
“We can do that,” I agree, stepping a little closer to him. “I was hoping we could talk.”
His eyes, full of intensity, are back and focused on me. “Everything okay?” His concern is evident in the tone of his voice.
“Yes.” I smile reassuringly.
“Oh, I get it.” He smiles. “I like the way you think,” he says with a wink. “Talking.” He wags his eyebrows again. “Sounds like a grand idea.”
Even though he’s not even close, I can’t help but smile at him. Mark is so laid-back, nothing seems to ruffle his feathers. That’s why I’m not worried about breaking the news to him that me wanting to “talk” means I actually want to talk. Although, his double meaning has some merit as well. Maybe we can do my version of talking, and if all goes well, move onto his. That is if he still wants me around. He could have a different idea of where this is going, and once I tell him I want more, that I want it all, that could be the end of this.
The end of us.
“Let’s make our rounds,” he says, placing his hand on the small of my back and leading me around the room. We stop and say goodbye to Seth and Kent first, then make our way to Tyler, Reagan, and the twins.
“Uncle Mark has to go.” He lifts Ben into his arms and hugs him close. And I know what he’s thinking. We could have lost him.
“My turn,” I say, reaching for Ben. He comes willingly into my arms, and just like Mark did, I snuggle him. I’m not related to these boys by blood, but I couldn’t love them anymore if I were. “Aunt Dawn is going to miss you,” I tell him, kissing his chubby little cheek.
“Hey, we want some of that,” Mark taunts, holding
Beck.
Leaning into them, I kiss Beck on the cheek, making him giggle. “I’ll miss you too,” I coo at him.
“What? Uncle Mark can’t get any loving?” Mark teases.
Leaning in, I kiss his cheek. The twins laugh from the four of us being gathered so close together. Ben reaches out and tugs on Beck’s shirt and they cackle with laughter. I’m not sure why they find that so funny, but baby laughter is infectious, especially from these two after the last few months of worrying about Ben and his heart condition.
“That’ll do for now,” Mark whispers huskily, once again just for me.
The combination of his words and the deep timbre of his voice in my ear causes a shiver to race through me. “All right, we’ll see you soon.” I give Ben another hug and tickle Beck’s side before Mark and I pass them back to Tyler and Reagan.
“Hey, we’re going to start poker night back up,” Tyler tells Mark.
“And,” Reagan chimes in, “we’re starting a girls’ night.”
“Count me in. Just let me know when and where.”
“What exactly does this girls’ night consist of?” Tyler asks as we walk away.
“You leaving?” Kendall asks as we approach her.
“Yeah, this little cutie has had a big day.” I run my hand over Everly’s baby-fine hair where she’s resting against her daddy’s shoulder.
“Thanks for coming,” Ridge says.
“No place we’d rather be, brother,” Mark replies.
“Hey, buddy, can Aunt Dawn have a hug?” I ask Knox, who is watching us with tired eyes.
He holds his arms out for me and I take him from Kendall. He rests his head against my shoulder and snuggles close. I hold him a little tighter. He’s growing up too fast. I glance at my best friend and her smile is wide as she watches her son in my arms.
Mark leans in close to Knox. “You moving in on my girl, little man?”
“Mine,” Knox says, tucking his arms into himself.
Mark’s eyes flash to me. “You’re the only one I’m willing to share her with,” he says, his voice strong. Confident.
The war that’s been raging inside of me since my talk with Reagan calms a little. Sure, he could be saying that for Knox’s benefit, but the intensity of his gaze tells me that’s not the case.
“I’ll see you later, buddy.” I give Knox another gentle squeeze. “I’ll give you back to Mommy.” At the sound of me referring to her as a mommy, Kendall’s eyes light up. It’s as if she still can’t believe that she holds that title for this little guy.
“Bump it.” Mark holds his fist out for Knox, and he doesn’t leave him hanging. He presents his little tightened fist to Mark, and they bump. “And you.” Mark leans in and kisses Everly on the cheek. “Happy Birthday, Princess Everly.” His voice is soft. When he backs away, I lean in and do the same.
The only girl of our tight-knit group and she has the guys wrapped around her little finger, and she has no idea. Although, they’re soft for the boys as well.
“Thanks for coming,” Kendall says again. “I’ll see you at work Monday.”
“Ugh,” I groan and she laughs.
“Tell me about it. The weekends seem to fly by.”
“I’ll be there.” With one last wave to everyone, we’re out the door. Mark’s arm settles around my waist as we make our way to his truck. He opens the door for me and I yelp in surprise when he grips my hips and lifts me into his truck.
I’m sitting sideways, and he steps in close. My thighs open for him, welcoming him closer. I want him as close to me as I can get him. All the time. His lips crash into mine in a searing kiss. The kiss is electric, not that I expect it to be otherwise. That’s how it’s always been between us. My mind swirls as all thoughts leave me, his kisses intoxicating. “Talking,” he mumbles against my lips. He kisses me quickly, just a peck on the corner of my mouth, before pulling away and shutting my door.
Once we’re on the road headed toward his place, he reaches over and laces his fingers through mine. That’s not something he would do if we were just casual, right? I mean, he didn’t start being openly affectionate until a few months ago, after we slept together for the first time. I bite back a groan and stare out the window. I hate that I’m analyzing every step, every form of contact between us. My stupid heart had to go and fall in love with him, and won’t let my mind shut off.
I want him to say we’re more. That this is beyond the usual for him. I don’t expect him to profess his love to me, but knowing it’s above just being casual would be nice. Then again, despite what he says, if he’s willing to continue down this path, regardless of how he wants to label us, I know I will follow along behind him. Even knowing the pain that will come when it does end. If that’s the case, I’ll still follow him. The pain of losing him is worth any amount of time spent with him.
He stays quiet as he pulls onto his street and then into his driveway. He releases his hold on my hand and climbs out of the truck. Taking a deep breath, I reach for the handle at the same time Mark pulls the door open. Hands on my hips, he lifts me from the truck. Holding me suspended in air, he kisses me softly before placing me on my feet. Tears prick my eyes. He’s so damn sweet, and always tender and patient. A complete contrast to his outside appearance. Hand in hand, we enter his house. Still neither of us say a word.
The room is shadowed as day turns to night. The evening glow of the sun peeks through the blinds, creating a romantic feel. When Mark doesn’t switch on the lights, I turn to look at him. He’s standing next to me, watching and waiting for what, I’m not sure. I take off my coat and hang it on the hook by the door. He does the same, never taking his eyes off me. Reaching out, he cradles my face in his palm. His calloused fingers are familiar against my skin. Slowly he leans down. Closer and closer, inch by torturous slow inch, his lips descend on mine.
At the first touch, I melt into him. Nothing in this world compares to Mark’s kisses. His touch is tender and his lips are soft. My hands grip his shirt, pulling him closer. I need him closer. I need there to be no space between us.
Dropping his hands, they settle on my hips, and I step into him. When his grip tightens and I’m lifted off my feet, I instinctively wrap my legs around his waist. A deep growl emits from somewhere deep in his chest, and I know there will be no talking. You would think with the growl that I’m in for it, but I know better than that. He’s always so gentle with me, as if he’s afraid he’s going to hurt me.
Touching.
Caressing.
Feeling.
That’s how this night is going to go.
Chapter Two
Mark
She wants to talk, and we will. I’m dreading it, but I’ve never been one to shy away from the hard stuff. I face life head-on and take each day as it comes. However, right now, all I want to do is cherish her. I have no idea what she wants to talk about, but from the sound of her voice and the hollowed look in her eyes when she asked me if we could talk, I’m almost certain I’m not going to like what she has to say.
I don’t really know how we got here. How we got to the point where we spend all of our spare time together. I think about her when she’s not with me, and I can’t keep my hands off her when she is. Tonight is no exception.
Our kiss is soft and slow. Which is what she deserves. She’s so damn tiny I’m always afraid I’m going to break her. My six-foot-four frame towers over her five-foot-four one. She’s a full foot shorter than me and is like a pixie. My pixie.
Needing her closer, I grip her hips and lift her feet off the floor. My intention was to be able to deepen the kiss, but my pixie takes it a step further and wraps her legs around my waist. When she tilts her hips and rubs her pussy over my cock, fire burns deep inside me. Need like I’ve never felt thrashes through my veins, and suddenly I can’t get close enough. My hands slide down to her ass and I grip her cheeks, one in each hand, as my tongue pushes past her lips. She moans, rocking her hips again, causing my cock to throb painfully behind my zipp
er.
Stroke after stroke, my tongue explores her mouth as I get lost in her taste. I’m in such a fog, lost in her, I don’t realize what I’m doing until a whimper escapes her. Pulling back, I rest my forehead against hers. “I’m sorry,” I pant as I fight to catch my breath. That’s what she does to me.
“Stop.” She gulps as she too works on catching her breath.
“I was rough with you.” Rough doesn’t really describe the death grip I had on her ass and the way I was grinding her against my cock. I’m always careful with her, never wanting to hurt her. I lost control and there is no excuse for that.
“Marcus,” she whispers. Her lips find their way to my neck, driving me wild.
The sweet sound of my full name rolling off her lips twists me up inside. No one calls me that except for my mom, and dad when he’s pissed. When Dawn does it, well, it lights me on fire. I can’t explain it and I don’t pretend to try.
“What, baby?” I ask, trying to maintain my composure.
She continues to kiss my neck, her lips finding their way to my ear. She nips at my lobe before whispering huskily, “Fuck me.”
Her whispered plea is hot lava coursing through my veins. Keeping a tight grip on her ass with one hand, the other reaches back and turns the deadbolt on the front door. Then we’re moving. She doesn’t stop her assault on my neck as she licks and sucks, igniting a fire inside me I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to tame.