“I’m confident they will be. Kiefer, why don’t you walk me out to my car?”
Ashley led the way to her front door. Kiefer followed his mother out. He checked the area as they walked toward her car. He nodded at the security guard standing near the front corner of the building.
“She’s a smart girl, Kiefer.” His mother patted his arm. “Try not to worry so.”
“Ashley’s like you. She takes chances that she shouldn’t.”
“You can only do what you can do. I know you feel guilty that you didn’t do anything when I was beaten. But you aren’t the one who should feel that way. I’m the one who should carry that burden. I had no business bringing home that man. I overstepped. I put you in danger.”
“Mom—”
“No, you hear me out. No child should witness that. It created a vein of distrust in you. I watched you become wary of people. When you finally did let someone in, of all things, she made you distrust more. I’m sorry for that. But not all people are bad. You must remember that. Have a little faith in Ashley and ease up on yourself.” His mother settled behind the wheel of her car. “You deserve to be happy. Give yourself a chance.”
“We’re just friends, Mom.”
His mother smiled. “Friends don’t look at each other the way you two did in the hall today.”
“Just don’t build it up into something it isn’t.”
She patted his hand, which was resting on the door window. “And you should recognize when you have someone worth fighting for.”
Kiefer returned to Ashley’s apartment to find her in the kitchen, cooking supper. “I’m sorry if I overreacted.”
She turned to him. “I understand. Really, I do.”
“I hear a ‘but’ in there.”
“Yeah. You’re going to have to learn to control your protective instinct.” Ashley turned the stove off and came to him, wrapping her arms around his waist.
“I can make no promises.” He pulled her into a hug.
“I’m not asking for any. Just asking you to try.”
“That I can do.”
She kissed his chin. “I think your mother knows there’s something going on between us.”
“I think she does too.” He grinned. “You made it pretty obvious that you were glad to see me this afternoon.”
“Me? You’re the one who looked happy to see me.”
Kiefer squeezed her butt. “I was. I am now.” He kissed her deeply, walking her back against the wall. His mouth went to her neck. “Almost as sweet as Marsha Hardy’s cherry cobbler.”
“What about supper?” Ashley asked.
He started removing her clothes. “I’m interested in dessert.”
CHAPTER EIGHT
A WEEK LATER Kiefer was dressing for the day when Ashley said, “I’ll be late tonight. I’ve got a council subcommittee meeting until ten.”
“I’ll pick you up.”
“Kiefer, I understand your concern for me. I truly do, but you can’t watch over me 24-7. I don’t want it and you have a job to do. I’ll be fine.”
“I’m sure you will be but I’d like to do it anyway.”
“I’ve been taking care of myself for years. I’m not going back to the way it was when I was a kid. Lighten up.”
Wasn’t that what his mother had told him? “Okay. I’ll see you at my place?”
“No, back here. I have an early meeting with local businesspeople tomorrow.”
He would feel better about her coming to his place but didn’t push it.
Kiefer saw nothing of Ashley during the day. He kept an eye out for her car but it was never in the parking lot. His day was busy and apparently hers was as well. After closing the clinic, he climbed the stairs to her place. He missed the noise and smell of Ashley cooking their dinner, and more than that her waiting with a smile. He had it bad. Worse than ever. To have been so determined to just have a good time and not get attached, he’d failed miserably. He’d fallen in love with the one woman who could drive him crazy emotionally and physically.
In love! After Brittney he’d sworn never to go there again. But he was completely absorbed with Ashley.
Time clicked slowly by as he waited for her to return. Having alerted the night security man that Ashley would be coming in late, he watched the evening shows, listening for a car. When the nightly news started and it was half an hour past time for Ashley to come home, he called her. Her phone went to voice mail.
Kiefer paced the floor, stopping long enough to look out the window, hoping to see car headlights. Taking a shower, he tried to convince himself that when he’d finished Ashley would be there. She wasn’t. He’d left his cell phone on the bathroom counter in case she called. Before he dried off, he checked to see if she had. No luck.
Still searching for light crossing the windows signaling Ashley’s return, fear became a tighter knot in his chest. His imagination had him seeing Marko and his gang driving Ashley off the road. After an hour and a half the sound of a car door closing told him Ashley was home. He waited on the landing of her front door when she started up the stairs.
“I expected you ages ago. Where have you been?” he demanded, hands balled tight at his sides.
Even in the dim light he saw her body language change, stiffen. Become defensive. “We were in a deep discussion and a couple of us went out for coffee after the meeting.”
“Why didn’t you call?” He was coming on too strong but didn’t know how to stop the raging emotions boiling in him.
“I tried. My phone battery died,” she said over her shoulder as she passed him on her way through the door.
“Something could have happened to you. I didn’t know where you were.”
She turned to face him. “Yes, it could have but it didn’t. I came and went without any problem before I knew you. I can take care of myself now as well.”
“Yes, but that’s before Marko started making threats.”
“Look.” She lifted her hands, letting her purse and the papers she carried fall to the floor. “I’m home safe.”
He’d pushed too far and now she was pushing back. Worry and anxiety had done a number on him. Didn’t she understand his distress at not knowing where she was?
“Kiefer, I don’t think this is going to work. I can’t take you hovering over me. Being on call to you. You reprimanding me when I don’t show up on your timetable. I need the space and you can’t seem to give it.”
Had someone punched him in the stomach? He couldn’t breathe. “Why? Because you can’t understand that after what has happened, you need to be careful?” he spit. He hadn’t talked to his ex-wife with such harshness even when he’d caught her kissing his best friend. Didn’t Ashley understand that all this anger came from being concerned about her?
“No, because all you can think about is being that kid who didn’t protect his mother. So now you overreact when you think someone might be in danger.”
“Might? Like someone being shot at? That’s a real danger. At least everyone but you thinks so.”
She paused for a moment. “I know, I shouldn’t ignore what happened. That’s why I haven’t made more of a fuss about the security men being here at night. But what I can’t live with is this hypervigilance from you about where I am and when I’m coming home. I had enough of that during my ch
ildhood.”
“But you’ve gone overboard the other way. Your parents convinced you that someone was out to get you at every turn. Now you believe no one will harm you. You take chances. Like facing up to Marko. Coming home at a late hour by yourself as if no one would be waiting to do you harm. You’ve been lucky so far. All I’m asking for is a simple phone call to let me know you aren’t in a ditch somewhere.”
“Not being a little overdramatic, are you? You think everyone is out to get me because the man your mother trusted turned on her. Your wife and friend betrayed you. You have to trust in people and believe in the best in them. My parents couldn’t do it and I hated that.”
“Trust. Is that what you were doing when you lied to your friends about being shot? Refused to tell your parents? If you would do that to the people you’re closest to, how do I know I can trust you to act safely?”
“I would never purposely hurt you by putting myself in danger. I need you to trust me to make my own choices. I know you have a hard time with that and you have a good reason.”
“But you’re not being safe.”
She took a step toward him. “How can you say that?”
“Because you’re so caught up in doing and fixing for everyone else that you can’t see what you should be doing for yourself. It’s like you think that if you keep busy, pushing for an improvement here and rebuilding there, you won’t have to think about what could happen or did happen. You want things to be perfect so another little girl won’t be hurt. The world has depraved people in it, Ashley. You can’t save everyone. Even Marko you’re trying to save by not wanting to get police help. Some people are just bad.”
She stepped toward him. “Like the guy that beat your mother. Your ex-wife. You want to carry the burden of hurt and guilt where they are concerned. You need to face that they were just bad people also. It seems like you might have the same problem as I do.”
That statement hit home. “This isn’t about what happened to my mother or with my ex-wife and what she did to me.” He pointed to her and then to his chest. “This is about you and me. Why can’t I get through to you? I’m not just worried about what happened tonight but your attitude about being aware of what is happening. It’s as if you can’t accept that someone has tried to do you harm. You seem to have gone into a mental shell where you’re pretending you’re unshakable. You’re denying reality. Is that what you did after Lizzy went missing? Did you zone out so that you could deal with it? Look at you—you still wear your guilt around your neck.”