Something metallic clattered within the mower. Edgar paused and stared down at the machine for a moment before looking behind him.
“Keep moving, ye gobshite. A little farther. Don’t get suspicious,” Niamh murmured, riveted to Edgar.
“What are you hoping for?” Austin whispered.
“Just wait,” she said.
Another object clattered through the mower, followed by a third, pinging and clacking around the parts before rattling out the back and flying up at Edgar’s body. More followed, sounding like metal popcorn popping. The vampire yelped and then jumped before pushing the handle forward again, staring at the grass in front of the mower.
Niamh began to chuckle. “Janey Mack. Only he would keep going.”
A flurry of pings and pops now, more foreign objects rolling through the cutters and gears of the lawn mower. The sun caught their exit, glittering on metal, before what looked like a host of little spikes stabbed into Edgar’s legs.
He screamed and jumped, dancing in place like someone was shooting at his feet. He pushed the lawn mower forward again, sending another score of metal projectiles through the machine and at him. He shrank back from the onslaught but didn’t move to the side to get out of the way, opening himself up for some body shots, the small slices of metal stabbing into his stomach and upper arms.
“Nooo!” he howled, his face pointed toward the sky, but he persisted in pushing forward, doing nothing to stopper the flow.
The absurdity of the scene, and Niamh’s helpless laugher, brought forth chuckles from Austin.
In the house, he felt Jess run toward the back door, anxiety pooling within her. Someone (or several someones) was on her heels, though he couldn’t feel who. While he did have a magical connection of sorts to the other protectors, he barely felt them when he tried and not at all when he didn’t, and he didn’t have much of the ability to sense who moved around Ivy House. He wondered if that trait was only granted to people who actually lived on or near the property. He was fine doing without.
Finally stopped for a moment, Edgar plucked one of the items from his person and studied it for a moment. He slipped it into his pocket and looked down at his legs, the lawn mower idling, the rotors surely still turning in that older machine. In a feat of perseverance or stupidity or both, Edgar slowly grabbed the handle and bent to push it forward.
“He’s going ta keep going, the donkey.” Niamh leaned forward, shaking with laughter. “What is he at? He’s a fair queer one, all right.”
“What’s in the grass?”
“Nails.” She guffawed into her cupped hand. “I half hammered a bunch of nails into the ground.”
“Why?” he asked Niamh, utterly bewildered. Or maybe he was asking the question of the cosmos.
“Just to keep him on his toes, sure. ’Tis good to have some wee danger in our everyday lives.”
More spikes rolled through the machine. The vampire yelled, dancing again, but continued to push the mower, crying out with each new onslaught. Austin couldn’t look away.
Jess ran out from the back door and into the grass, headed for Edgar.
Austin was moving before he’d consciously thought of it, exploding out of the bushes and running to cut her off.
“No, no, Jessie.” Edgar put out his hand, still pushing the mower, amazingly enough. He looked like he was tap-dancing. “This is a dangerous job. Don’t approach.”
Austin caught Jess when she was within feet of Edgar, ripping her up off the ground and holding her against his chest to stop her from going any farther. She twisted within his grasp, trying to see Edgar. Ulric and Jasper flanked Austin, faces hard as they scanned Edgar’s shimmering body, specks of shining metal amid seeping black blood.
“Oh, gross, vampires bleed black?” Jess said, clearly unable to help herself. A beautiful blush seeped into her cheeks. “I mean…”
“What is the meaning of this?” Earl jogged out next. “Edgar, what is happening? Has the lawn mower attacked you? Why are you screaming?”
“It’s…” Edgar finally shut off the mower and then looked down at his legs, one hand still on the handle. “I’m not sure. It seems there is something in the grass. Have no fear, Jessie. I will root them all up and throw them away so no one will step on them. I’d hate for someone to be enjoying the lovely day and get one of these stuck in their feet.”
“There has to be an easier way to root up whatever they are,” Ulric said, a smile spreading across his face.
“They’re nails,” Niamh said, catching up. She pointed at the ground in front of the mower. “Look like ’em, anyway. I wonder how those got there…”
Austin glanced at her. She put her finger to the side of her neck and pulled it across her throat. “Snitches get stitches,” she mouthed. She clearly did not care about his higher status within the Ivy House council.